Back Story: I absolutely had to have this cock ring when I saw! ‘Sex with Sharks’ has been a running joke with me and a few of my friends since the mid 90’s. This joke eventually made its way into becoming a song, the title of an album, and artwork for t-shirts and buttons for my band, as well as being my email address. So I had no choice when I saw a Shark cock ring, I was simply obligated to get it! That being said, without the back story, I still would have wanted this cock ring when I first saw it. It is just too cool!

Packaging: The cock ring came packaged in a small Ziploc style baggy, inside a small glossy box. The fact that it came in a Ziploc style baggy immediately made think of Cheech dressed as a drug dealer in the bathroom of some concert in Still Smokin’, saying something like, “look man, I got some sharks” (my immature imagination has no ‘off’ switch).

The box has a picture of a blond haired surfer dude, with ripped abs, who really looks like he stepped out of a 90’s Vivid DVD. He is wearing “Jams”, standing in front of a blurred blue sky setting, holding a surf board, and the Shark cock ring is just floating over top of this picture.

I know, it makes no sense, but what the hell are you supposed to put on the box of a shark-looking cock ring. If you make it too cool, it will look like a horror movie cover and not a sex toy. So even though I don’t get it, I understand.

Construction: This cock ring is made out of TPR silicone, so don’t use silicone based lube with this cock ring. Do you remember what happened to the Wicked Witch of the West who was also made out of silicone? That’s right, Dorothy tried to sex her up with all that silicone lube. And just like with this little Sharky’s Machine - cock ring, there will immediately be lots of overly dramatic and violent melting going on (or at least some mild melting, which might occur gradually).

So anyway… this cock ring’s construction and makeup are pretty solid. It is a good bit stretchier than it seems like it ought to be, which is definitely a plus! It is however, NOT stretchy enough to go around your cock AND balls. Upon my initial examination, I was predicting that this ring was going to grip and pull hair; I am happy to report that it did not!

Cleaning: As far as cleaning goes, I just threw this little shark into the bucket of raw meat and blood that we keep beside our bed. However, I am sure that a little bit of soap and water would also do the trick. Since there is no way to sterilize it, or use a condom with it, it is definitely not a good toy for sharing.

The cock ring was sitting around for a little bit, waiting for a chance to prove itself. I had started joking around about it, referring to my wife and I using this cock ring as a “shark attack”. One day we even had a lengthy joke conversation in text messages that started out with me telling her that her horoscope said that she should avoid the water today, because there was a shark attack in her future. So, during some afternoon delight, the shark attack finally occurred.

After deciding to try out the shark cock ring, I acted helpless so that my wife would take care of business (I like it when she does that). She got me in the mood, applied some lube, and then fed my cock through the shark’s mouth. It went on pretty easy, and it did not grip and pull out my hair which I was worried it might do. Then we got down to ‘gettin down’!

The shark was initially a little tight. Once we got down to business, it got a little tighter. The base of the ring was a bit thick, so while being used, the ring kind of rolled up backwards and became tight. This happened as soon as we began. It turned into a bit of a barrier. It kept me from going in maybe a half an inch because the ring was all bunched at the base of my cock.

I don’t really think that the shark’s teethy / nubby thingys, really added to any pleasure that my wife was experiencing. She described the feeling of the shark against her as “Pokey and Burny”.

I am assuming it was restricting blood flow and doing what cock rings normally do, but it facilitated an extremely unusual orgasm for me. When I got off, it came out of nowhere. Normally you can feel, the build up, it getting closer, the point of no return, and then the ejaculation. While wearing this shark, I experienced absolutely NO build up at all. We were movin right along and then out of nowhere, BANG! This was not bad, but it was a little confusing.

In my opinion, the bottom line on this toy is form over function. I would definitely recommend this toy if you getting together a whole bunch of stuff for a crazy sex-in-a-hotel-weekend=marathon, since it’s cheap and fun. But if you’re just searching for a good cock ring to enhance sex on a regular basis, I would recommend that you pass over the shark. For me, the crazy stuff always catches my eye and we had so much fun talking about it and trying it out that I in no way regret picking this up. It wasn’t a great sex toy, but it was a great adventure.

Click here to see some pictures that I posted on my bloggy blog!

I thought I would give this ol' Shark one more chance, and sadly enough my opinion of it has not changed at all (but has been reaffirmed). Yes it is fun, but the second time around the novelty of it has worn off. You are then left with an average cock ring, that feels pretty uncomfortable for whomever is on the receiving end of the "Shark Attack'!