No Miracle Here - All I Got Was a Sore Dick

It's a sad day when a new toy turns out to be not as good as you hoped for. It is even worse when you can't even get anything out of it. This toy can be used as a clit stimulator for a woman, so for some people it may be worth it, but not for me. Maybe someone else will take this design and make it work. I like the concept for this toy but its execution is a fail.
Published:
Pros
Usable for a man and woman
Attachments easy to put on and take off
Strong vibrations
Cons
Too big, so you won't feel a thing!
Painful ridges inside
Rating by reviewer:
1
useful review

Use

The His Miracle Massager is an interesting toy. Being a guy and seeing girlfriends go crazy from using vibrating toys, I wanted something similar too! This product looks perfect, like it would be usable for him and her at a low price. The toy comes with two attachments, a round nub for the woman and a sleeve for the man. I tried both attachments and the vibrations are powerful.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Couples
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • On a bed only

Material / Texture

The material feels like rubber. It's hard - but it is not supposed to be soft, it is supposed to vibrate. Both attachments transmitted the vibrations just fine. The nub is smooth with a small hole on the tip and a seam horizontally around the nub. The masturbator attachment has these pointy ridges. I tried to lube up everything and thrust a bit. Ouch!

Shape / Design / Size / Fit

The design is great. Attachments go on and off easily, the controls work, the cord is only a couple of feet long but it's long enough.

The problem with this toy is the size. The masturbator sleeve is way, way, WAY too big. I always thought I have a fairly decent-sized penis. The really small Tenga Flip Air Lite was too small for me which made me feel like a super stud! But when I put this on, I thought, "Wait, do I have a micro-dick? Is everybody walking around with 10-inch monster dicks?"

Here's a comparison picture, with a Tenga 3D Spiral on the left and a Fleshlight Girls on the right. Notice how the opening is so big compared to them.


How ridiculous is that? I question if California Exotics has ever seen a penis before or tested this device. I did manage to squeeze it firmly with both hands to get it to actually touch my dick, and the sensations were okay, but then the ridges and the pressure felt like I was strangling my dick. It was horrible!

Functions / Performance / Controls

The vibrations are strong, the controls are easy to get to, and the noise level is fairly low. I did the "next-room test," and with the door shut, you have to really lean against the door and try to hear the buzzing on the other side, or you can't hear it at all.

Care and Maintenance

This toy is easy to take care of. Run water over the nub and into the sleeve to clean it out. I did not orgasm into the sleeve but it is large enough for you to kinda scrub the inside if you ever need to. The pieces fit very simply into the plastic holder it came with.
    • Easy to clean
    • Easy to store

Packaging

The packaging is great: easy to open so you can plug in and go right away. The instructions stated it should not be used for more than about 15 minutes at a time. I haven't tested it for a long period of time, but if you like long sessions, I wouldn't push it.
    • Good for storage
    • Very informative

Personal comments

I was hoping for a cheap alternative to the Cobra Libre. I read some great reviews so I thought this would be a good purchase. I was wrong. This is my first review because I just had to warn people of how this product doesn't work on men, so others won't make the same mistake I did. I really like most of Eden's offerings but this was immensely disappointing.

Experience

I really gave this a fair shot. I was excited to get this as it is something different from your average masturbation sleeve. I lubed it up and got hard, put it over my dick, and found that my dick doesn't touch the sides. I have a normal-sized dick, so come on, how can this be so far off? I can squeeze it to make it tight, but that feels weird, and I tried to thrust gently and the ridges hurt me. It's useless for a man - it just doesn't work!

The nub part for women may work fantastically so the toy itself may not be worthless, but unless you can modify it or invent some weird technique to make it work, for a man this is a waste.
This content is the opinion of the submitting contributor and is not endorsed by EdenFantasys.com

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This review was edited by
  • Girly Juice Contributor: Girly Juice
  • Rank:
    5.8 / 10
  • Edited reviews: 207
Comments
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  • Contributor: allgood1
    very helpfull thank you
  • Contributor: S&Gangel
    thanks, quite interesting
  • Contributor: Trysexual
    I was very disappointed too. For me it fit snug, but didn't feel good and the damn thing is very loud too. The sleeve is a poor design. Thanks for the review. Just goes to show you can't always trust 5 star ratings.
  • Contributor: Passionate Mandi
    nice review!
  • Contributor: SabrinaKay
    ty
  • Contributor: edeneve
    thanks for the review
  • Contributor: loveme9
    Thanks for the review .
  • Contributor: Thomas90
    Good review! Shame you didnt get on with the product too well though
  • Contributor: srexom
    thanks for the review.
  • Contributor: drav
    thanks for the review!
  • Contributor: SecretKinksters
    Thanks for the comparison pic!! nice review.
  • Contributor: babymario
    thanks for the info
  • Contributor: Lowl
    thanx
  • Contributor: Denise Ellis Lougheed
    thxs
  • Contributor: Sempifi99
    Thanks for the review, I think I will be avoiding this one.
  • Contributor: froggie117
    Thanks for the review...was hoping for something new and fun for my husband...guess I will keep looking.
  • Contributor: Chastity Darling
    This review made me giggle. Thanks.
  • Contributor: Rhazya
    Loved this review, very informative and made me laugh.
  • Contributor: Badmew
    thanks for taking the time to review!
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