There are days when a stroker or pocket pussy just won’t do, sometimes you want a more realistic solo session; this is where a more life size toy is needed. Y'all know, something that can be used hands free without worry about stuffing a stroker in the couch cushions. Something to leave your hands free for other simulations like spanking that ass a few times (something that is not allowed in our bedroom) or a mock threesome with your partner.

Enter the Noches Latinas Big Ass and Vagina, part of the Latin Nights line from Doc Johnson. A realistic looking toy with two usable holes, two rather large (for a toy) butt cheeks for hand gripping pleasure and an included egg vibrator. "Big ass"...Uh ya, this is one big hunk of UR3, 14 pounds worth of it. When the shipping box showed up I was very surprised at the weight and size. My first thought was "Where the hell am I going to store this?" This is not something that will fit in a drawer or under the pillow. After opening the shipping box though, all thoughts of storage were gone as I gazed at the fine ass, skillfully molded pussy and anus beckoning to me. Just look for yourself, inviting is it not?



The first thing you want to do when you get ready to use this is to wash off the factory applied powdered lube, this keeps the UR3 feeling great and helps prevent hair and dust bunnies from attaching. This will also warm up the material for a more realistic feel. You might think the powdered lube will work for use but honestly I find it better to wash it off. After she is warmed up find a good water based lube and decide which hole to start with. You may also want to install the egg vibe in the back side of the toy. Among the weight reducing holes, there is a hole for the egg. This has been molded off to the side of the vagina/anus passage. The egg has steady vibes that are adjustable from low to high, these vibes are not earth shaking by any means but do add to the experience. The vibes are quiet when installed in the toy but may be heard if not. You will need two AA batteries for the egg vibe.



The vagina and anus share the same ribbed passage, all but the longest guys will be able to use this toy as the passage goes all the way through the toy, diameter is not an issue here. The anal passage enters the top of the vaginal passage about two inches in. You can feel the junction when using the vaginal passage but it feels pretty good. There is plenty of distance between orifices so tearing should not be an issue. One thing I did not care for is the orientation of the anal passage when the toy is lying flat, it is almost impossible to enter the anus in a standing/doggie style position. Even when you lay on it the angle is just not right. Not that it cannot be used; it just takes some creative thinking. I would say that for most guys this will get more vaginal use than anal. I like to place a butt plug or second vibe in the anus for the added stimuli or just finger it during use.

I can't say that the anus or vagina feel "Real" to my penis but the material does a fine job at mimicking skin, especially when warm and feels quite good nonetheless. Furthermore, the look of the realistic molding more than makes up for the unrealistic inside texture and lack of a heart beat. I was surprised by the ribbing inside this toy, a lot of textures in UR3 are not felt very well by me but this one I felt every rib.

As you can imagine, cleaning can be a bit of a chore. I found the tub to be the best place for cleaning, it will fit in a bathroom sink but it's just easier to use the tub. The passage is easy to clean since the material is so soft, just use your fingers to work the antibacterial soap or toy cleaner in. Then heft the toy up to the faucet to rinse. Pat dry with a towel, allow the passages to dry and apply the included powered lube to keep it feeling great. UR3 is porous so no sharing without a condom please.

Storage is a hard one with this toy, it's just so big. I have to store mine in the garage for fear my kids will see the box.

You might want something to place the toy on for use due to the weight and floppiness of the material. It can be used say with you lying on your back, one of the best ways to use the anus, but it is not the funnest thing to try. No, this is a toy best used on a bed, counter or chair/couch. If you happen to have a Liberator Ramp or wedge, these will come in handy. One of the best ways I have found to use this toy is on my Wedge; this makes the angle better and raises the toy up off the bed.

A couple of pics, one of the floppiness and one with it on the Liberator Wedge:






I am really enjoying this toy, the passages feel great and the realistic molding is just awesome. I have no big complaints about it and highly recommend it. The weight keeps it in place during use and the size adds a nice cushion to heavy pounding. The ass cheeks even give a nice shake when spanked.