Smelly Jelly, Sucky Yucky, Fuzz Buzz

For my first clit pump, I was extremely disappointed. For $12.99, you get what you pay for. The design is a patched up mess, the jelly smell was atrocious and the bullet was weak. It's also hard to clean but easy to break. I read other reviews on this and thought it would be worth a shot, but for me it rates far below standard and mostly seems like a waste of $13.00.
Published:
Pros
Might get some use out of the bullet
Cons
Smells horrible (Jelly), broke easily, hard to clean
Rating by reviewer:
1
extremely useful review

Use

This product is best used to create suction to the clitoral area and vibrate stimulators on the clit. It can also be used for other parts of the body like the nipple area or other places where you can create suction.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Couples
    • Solo
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Anywhere
  • Body / part areas
    [ ? ]
    What areas on the body can this product be used / what areas does it stimulate best?
    • Clitoris
    • Nipples

Material / Texture

I received this as my first jelly toy along with a G fun as a free gift in my order. The G fun is also made of jelly. When I first opened my package from Eden, there was a distinct sour type of smell in the box. It wasn't very strong, until I actually opened up the box for this toy and found where the smell was coming from. It was a very strong, rancid smell, the kind that reminds me of when you have opened up a container of orange juice that is past expiration or the smell of the lettuce that has turned brown and gooey in your fridge. Yes, it was THAT bad. While other people might be okay with it, I have a very heightened sense of smell which made my gag reflexes want to get all worked up. Since I had never dealt with a jelly toy before, I thought maybe this was a fluke and opened the G fun toy to see how it smelled. The G fun was not as strong but it was the same smell. I could not handle it.

As such, I washed it (see care/maintenance below for that fiasco). Even after washing it and leaving it out to dry, I still couldn't get rid of the smell, not even a little bit. Because my sense of smell is heightened, when I am in the dark or when my eyesight is weakened (as is the usual situation during sexual play for me), my sense of smell takes over. It's the first thing that strikes me. So while I was willing to still try it out for other purposes, I already had an aversion to this toy that was hard for me to overcome while using it. Due to the smell alone, there was no way I was going to taste it.

I normally use TPR or silicone toys for my flexible toys, and I can state that as for the texture of the material, it was a little harder than the silicone toys while still being a bit flexible. This helped a bit with the suction because the lips part of it formed a more strong foundation for the seal of the suction. However, this also was the reason, in my opinion, why the vibrations were not as good, because the three little tongue protrusions in the middle of the lips did not wiggle very much when the vibrator was on which is different from my other toys where vibrations make little protrusions wiggle like crazy.
    • Bumpy
    • Strong odor

Design / Shape / Size

First of all, the item I got was not exactly what is shown in the pictures on Eden. The video that has been uploaded gives a better showing of the design of the toy. The reason I note this is because of the design flaws in the "updated" product.

The product consists of 6 basic parts: the pump, the cord, the mouth (bullet casing), the tongues, the bullet and the controller. Most of it is seen in the Eden pictures, except the tongues. The tongues were added to the product as an improved feature. There were two ways to tell as I found these pictures with the addition of the tongues online:


As well as noticing on my box that a sticker was stuck on mine to show the additional feature:



Why is this important? Because the tongue addition basically looked as if it were superglued into the toy.

How did I discover this? When I tried this on my clit for the first time, I got it suctioned around my clit and turned on the vibes. Due to the fact that the little tongues stick out to far, they were smashed against my clit and didn't vibrate like they should. I looked again and discovered that the tongues were not being touched by the bullet vibe. As such, the tongues were not getting the action from the bullet that they should have gotten. I tried to push the bullet farther towards the tongues part, but the bullet would not budge. Instead the tongues part got sucked up further into the mouth towards the bullet but then the tongues were at a very strange angle that crossed over the lips of the mouth and interfered with suction.

So in order to get rid of that extra suction between the bullet and the tongues, I had to take the bullet out. Design flaw number two, the bullet is nearly impossible to remove! As I was trying to get the bullet out, pushing on one end and pulling it out on the other, the suction of the tongues was lost because the seal of the tongues to the inner lining of the mouth broke. I finally got the bullet out, but the tongues were now half detached from the mouth.



Then as I was trying to clean it up and put it back together, the seal from the tube to the mouth also broke and now the tubing does not stay in very well.

    • Whimsical / artistic

Functions / Performance / Controls

Another thing about the little tongue protrusions sticking out too far so that they were smushed up against my nipple or my clit was that the vibes didn't travel well to the clit or nipple. As such, they didn't give the sensation of "lapping" like tongues but just gave the buzzing feeling of the bullet. I could have gotten the same feeling by simply rubbing the bullet over my nipple or clit. Frankly, it did nothing to enhance the toy at all for me.

The controller is a flimsy piece of plastic that can easily break, and the vibrations were just set from soft to hard on a dial wheel. Even at full speed, the vibrations were not very exciting. Also due to the thickness of the toy (where the bullet is stuck), the vibrations do not travel well to the other parts of the product.

As far as waterproof, it states right on the box that it is 100% waterproof. This is absolutely not true. The power controller itself is flimsy plastic that would be flooded immediately if any water were even accidentally spilled on it. I would not recommend it for use in the shower or the bath at all.
    • Hard to figure out
    • Not discreet at all
    • Not enough variety

Care and Maintenance

This toy is made out of jelly. As such it is porous and should not be shared. As stated on Eden's Guide to Materials, you can use water or silicone lubricants on it. I only used a water lubricant.

As it is porous, the best way to clean is with warm water and a toy cleaner. Now, my actual experience in cleaning this toy was a bit of a challenge.

First, I wanted to clean the whole toy and to do so, there are several parts to this toy: 1) the pump bulb, 2) the pump tube, 3) the suction cup lips, 4) the tongues, 5) the bullet and 6) the wires and controller. As the bullet was stuck in the suction cup lips part and the bullet had a wire to the controller, I couldn't just stick the whole thing in the sink or under water to clean.

Second, due to the smell, I wanted to clean this toy to try and get rid of the disgusting odor as I have a hard time enjoying myself if my nose is offended. So I tried some warm water and my toy cleaner. It was nice and clean but still smelled awful. It then says not to use strong soaps, so I used a very mild smelling antibacterial soap. While my hands smelled nice and clean, the toy did not. I used a more fragrant soap and my hands smelled great, the toy still smelled like rancid oranges.

So after the first use, I cleaned it again. That was when the tongues started to come unglued to the inside of the mouth. It was then that I had to work at taking out the bullet to clean as well, which is nearly as impossible to put back in as it was to remove it. It was also when I was trying to take the tubing out that I broke the glued seal on that as well.

After the second try at this product failed miserably, I look at cleaning it again, but since the seal broke on the tongues and the tubing, I gave up as I would also have to take the bullet out again and once was enough for me. Instead I ripped out the tongues to give you a better picture of the superglue addition of the tongues in the mouth.


    • Difficult to store
    • Hard to clean
    • High maintenance

Packaging

The box is simply as shown. No instructions, no information other than simple use. And the box shows the old version before the tongues with a simple sticker put on the box showing the improvement of the product. Very cheap and cheesy. The box does show a half undressed woman as well as a picture of the product so it is not discreet at all.
    • Minimal
    • Not discreet
    • Recyclable

Experience

After putting it all back together, I gave it another try a few days later. The suction was now even worse as it was hard to get the tube to stay connected with the mouth. When I finally got suction on, I turned on the vibes which now also felt weaker than before. I ended up climaxing, which got sucked up past the tongues because the seal had been broken. It pretty much felt like the tongues were just shoved up in there between the bullet and my clit. Not really any fun. Will be throwing this one away immediately after this review.
This content is the opinion of the submitting contributor and is not endorsed by EdenFantasys.com

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This review was edited by
  • Kindred Contributor: Kindred
  • Rank:
    6.7 / 10
  • Edited reviews: 1214
Comments
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  • Contributor: Kissy
    Yikes! I am staying far away from this one! Thanks for the write up on this one!
  • Contributor: Masen'sChick
    That sucks that this didnt work out for you.
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