Twenty-two years old, over-sensitive clit, under-sensitive everything else, and never had a real orgasm.

What a frustrating and unfulfilled existence, right?

So two and a half weeks ago my girlfriend and I went to get me a “helper”.

Having never bought a toy before, there I am standing in front of the displays, looking like a deer in the headlights and faced with a rather daunting decision. With no frame of reference and unable to choose, my girlfriend took the liberty of picking Teagan's™ Jelly Bendies™ Teaser for me.

Fast-forward to later that night… I should mention I was a virgin, so it was a little surprising when I was straddling my girlfriend and the vibrator was suddenly shoved inside me. I suppose it’s a good thing I need little to no lube, otherwise the 1 5/8 inch diameter could have caused some damage.

Thrusting was a bit uncomfortable, probably because I was still adjusting, and it was pretty painful every time it hit my cervix. Quite a bit of experimenting later, and still nothing mildly orgasmic for me.

In all honesty, I much preferred my girlfriend's fingers over the Teaser.

Last week I got close from rocking the head against my g-spot, but after 10 minutes of teetering on the edge I still couldn’t manage to orgasm, which was completely maddening.

Pros:
- The large realistic head feels pretty good inside, but only when rotated or rocked.
- The overall feel is pretty firm due to the inner vertebrae.
Cons:
- The first thing that became apparent is just how loud the vibration is, which sounded like a small engine on high and easily heard from outside my bedroom.
- The bendable vertebrae which is supposed to ” bend and shape however you want and it will stay that way until you change it”. It only bends at about 45 degrees in any direction, and straightens out as soon as you start to insert it.
- The vertebrae makes a very loud squeaking noise at random times when thrust, and hearing "Oh baby yes!" *squeak squeak squeakkkkk*... is rather unsexy XD
- The controls are adjusted by twisting the base. Unfortunately it twists rather easily, and the vibrating turned on and off randomly.
- After only a few uses, the jelly started to pull away from the base, which didn’t seem to be glued down very well to begin with. This also made me really hesitant to put it anywhere near water, even though it’s labeled as waterproof.
- The “textural nubs” start to get uncomfortable quite quickly.
- When fully inserting, the head/nubs feels like it catches on something, then pushes past. It’s a really disturbing feeling so I stopped inserting it past half way.
- The jelly smell it quite strong, and after holding it, my skin acquired the same odor. Even several cleanings haven’t reduced the smell much.
- The surface gets pretty tacky and linty, and don't even think about putting it near your mouth.
- Apparently I’m not exactly gentle with the toy, and I managed to break the vibrating function after maybe the third use.

Care: The Teaser is made out of a jelly material, which is soft and porous, so it cannot be disinfected, and it has a shorter lifespan than silicone or vinyl. Jelly toys should be cleaned with warm water and mild soap or toy cleaner, and should be stored in a cool, dry place.

Water or silicone lubricants are compatible with the jelly material, but avoid use oil-based which will damage the vibrator. It is advised to use latex condoms with this vibrator because jelly often contains phthalates, a chemical which is potentially harmful.

Power: Runs on 2 AA batteries, so I recommend using rechargeable.

P.S.: With 7 insertable inches and a 5 inch circumference, I really don’t recommend it for virgins or as a starter vibrator. Although it only weighs 0.5lb, it’s solid and has some heft to it (I smacked my girlfriend in the arm with it a few times), so it could also be used to beat someone up with.