When you think of worms, you don't usually think of something quite so cute. You probably don't think of something so large either. At 8 inches in width and with a 2 inch diameter, this not-so-little vibrator is quite the package. And if you think you recognize the workmanship of this toy, you do. I Rub My Wormie is a cousin to the I Rub my Duckie line making it a wonderfully discreet toy.

I was very excited to try my Wormie when he arrived at my door. I struggled through the plastic blister packaging (which I think ought to be outlawed), all the while the Wormie gazed at me invitingly from his perch on a log against a backdrop of leaves. "Your leaf or mine?" he asked unabashedly. Mine it was.

The package contained a lot of useful information. It recommends a water-based lube and explains that the Wormie's skin is "Soft2Touch" technology which contains no PVC, Latex or Pthalates. The packaging claimed the I Rub My Wormie to be the world's most powerful waterproof massager and heralded the neck’s "ergonomic bend to reach those (G)reat spots." The paperboard also folded out to reveal more information. So far, I was impressed by the high quality and lack of harmful chemicals in the Wormie.

I tried this waterproof vibrator in the shower first but found insertion to be impossible. Why, I wondered, would they recommend water based lube for a waterproof toy? Wouldn't the lubricant simply wash away? And it did. I suspect the Soft2Touch skin, which is velvety, is silicone.

I also tried the Wormie dry, without the lube rinsing away this time. Still, I could barely insert the Wormie's large head and soon gave up after I had applied so much lube that I nearly couldn't grasp the toy. This brings me to my first issue with the Wormie: he simply is not insertable and it makes little sense to market this toy as a G-spot one. I really feel that the Wormie might be a better vaginal toy if the head were the same size as the body, the neck had less of an angle or if the neck were a flexible joint.

The size issue is a shame because the Wormie's body seems like it would be perfect for insertion. For the sake of experimentation, I did try the Wormie backwards, using his head as a handle but it's not ideal because then the switches and battery case are inside the vagina.

The Wormie stood up to the water test well, however. The battery cap was very snug and I felt it was a quality waterproof toy.

I moved on and began to use the Wormie as a clitoral stimulator and was very happy. This vibrator has 2 settings and I found them to be fairly powerful making the Wormie perhaps the strongest vibe in my collection. It better be considering it takes 2 C batteries; I had to buy them especially for the Wormie as none were included. I would perhaps like a third setting as the lower setting was just shy of what I wanted and the higher one was too much; it made my hand uncomfortable.
The Wormie did bring me to orgasm more than once with a little pressure and vibration on the lower setting. I think this toy provided better vibration than most of the toys I have tried because I had to rely less on pressure than I usually do.

I felt that the Wormie was loud. On high, it could definitely be heard through a closed door and would make someone wonder "What is that sound?" It's more conspicuous on the lower level, though. At some points, I could even hear the batteries

My last complaint is with the battery cover and switches. During my playtime, I found myself accidentally unscrewing the cover or turning the toy off on several occasions. This is very frustrating. Furthermore, I sometimes struggled to turn on the Wormie because of his awkward controls. I think a digital button would be better than the switch beneath the Wormie's skin.

I Rub My Wormie is not perfect. The noise level, controls and size of the head could be improved. Because of the Wormie's faults, I did not enjoy it as I believe it was intended to be used. However, I did thoroughly enjoy this vibrator as a clit stimulator and it earns high ranks from me because of that.

With the Wormie's head between my legs, I rubbed the toy against my labia and clit. The dozens of little feet pressed against my skin added something a little bit more to my experience, something I had not expected. For clit play, the larger head really hit the spot and added a nice amount of pressure which some smaller toys do not provide. I also liked being able to grasp the Wormie at his tail while the motor was near the neck; the vibrations weren't centered on my hand and making me uncomfortable like eggs.

Although I still find the Wormie to be adorable, and sufficiently powerful, I must admit that I haven't reached for him much after writing my initial review. He performs well as a clitoral vibrator and offers many different textures from his back, head, and feet, but he's just not the bed toy for the job.

At this point I prefer my Laya Spot which isn't nearly as bulky as this guy ,and is quieter too. The Wormie isn't as versatile as other toys. He makes a great pet for anyone needing a discreet pleasure pal (as long as noise isn't an issue), but as my tastes have evolved, he's not the best solution for me.