This toy, which shall remain nameless due to an incredibly embarrassing name, looks totally cute. You could leave this thing out and no one would know it had been in your vagina the night before. You can see that as a plus or a minus depending on whether or not you have friends that tend to pick up random things in your house and play with them (and who wouldn't be happy playing with things that had been in or near your vagina).

It's small and hard. The coating is a lovely soft-touch plastic. I love that stuff. It feels velvety and smooth and when lubed up it doesn't catch, but still gives you some friction. There are no buttons, which adds to the discreet factor, and there is only one speed: Too low. The vibrations do have some oomph behind them, but they're not very powerful. Let me explain. It's kind of rumbly, so the vibrations carry well, but it's just not powerful enough for that to make much of a difference. The on/off control is the big bulb end. You twist it. It's a little strange and it's fairly easy to turn it off right in the middle of shenanigans. A pain in the butt.

It also vibrates at the thin end. I suppose that's the right call, when I think about it, but somehow I hoped the big end vibrated. It would have made it easier to use on the wife and maybe a bit more interesting.

It's waterproof, so it's easy to clean, runs on one AAA battery (possibly explaining the underpowering) and is generally well constructed. It feels really nice in the hand.

So, basically, it's a bit small to insert, a bit short and oddly shaped for a clit vibe, a touch underpowered for either, and the power switch is a little awkward.

But it's cute and it feels nice.

This toy came out, we cooed over the cuteness, we put a battery in it, got a touch confused about turning it on, got more confused about which end vibrated, tried it out and just about immediately relegated it to cold storage with the other misfit toys. It didn't want to be a dentist, but it didn't want to please her vagina either. The vibrations are pretty high quality, I'll give it that, no annoying buzziness, but just not enough power.

The wife is a bit of a power queen, but not extreme. It's not as if we need a Hitachi to get her off, but she does like some firm stimulation. This does not provide that.