Pipedream made a real pipenightmare!

This was a toy that I pined for. I patiently sat by the mailbox, lube in hand, ready to love it...and then when it arrived... boy, what a let down.

The entire Icicles line of handblown glass massagers had such beautiful marketing and packaging that one couldn't help but be mislead into thinking this was going to be an exotic, one-of-kind pleasure piece...but like an ugly, underwater bait-n-switch, it was nothing more than a light, colorless, cheap glass novelty that went straight into storage.

The color is no where as saturated as it is in all of the photography- and while I'm not one to refuse a toy a try because of color, it was almost a surprise, and I thought I had received the wrong color because it's a milky-pink at best. So, bummer.

The toy, in comparison to the others in the line, was supposed to be one of the larger pieces, and while its girth is substantial, I was surprised at how small it was in person. Not to mention very lightweight and lacking a lot of what I like in heavy glass pieces. Double bummer.

...And then the cool detail and ridges and bumps that should leave you with the feeling of being pleasured by a kinky, soft, mer-man squid-paw was a joke. The details were equally small in distinction and got lost in all of my soft tissue and nerves. It had about as much variety internally as a french tickler condom. Triple bummer... enough.

I washed it off and played with the idea of making it a paperweight for a while, but after the high expectations and the subsequent let down, I was so off-put by this toy (and a little betrayed), I tucked it away. Now it will only see the light of day if I need an "alternative" weapon in a post-apocalyptic civil war to creep out the opposition with.