It's a bird! It's a plane! It's . . . a dildo! It's an awesome dildo at that. This is where I state the obvious uses for this type of device. You can insert this phallic shaped object into the vagina or anus for sexual stimulation. Bet you didn't know that, huh? Moving on . . .

You like that realistic feel but realistic dildos creep you out? (I'm right there with ya on that one.) Are you a toy snob, such as myself, who refuses to play with anything that's porous? (I hate germs and always want to share the love.) Do you sometimes wish that silicone dildos weren't so floppy? Well, ladies and gents, meet the Tantus O2 Cush.

It's fun for those with girl and boy parts. It's also fun for those out there who have girl parts but like to mix it up by wielding boy parts. It plays well with everyone out there, but it prefers those who can appreciate it's impressive stature. It takes its job as insertable object very seriously and backs that up with a more mass than your average players. It may not be the most intimidating bad boy on the block by any means, but it'll leave you fulfilled if you know what I mean.

Flying solo? No problems here! It enjoys small gatherings. It doesn't consider three to be a crowd either. It's more than willing to saddle up in that harness and go for a spin. It also enjoys adventures into the anal abyss! It must have been a boy scout because it comes prepared with a flared base just for these occasions. Play to your heart's content! It's not going anywhere and is comfy and cozy no matter what the situation.

Sometimes dildos are, for back of a better word, floppy. Someone must have handed this one one of those magical enhancement pills because it's always rises to the challenge! Not too firm, not to soft, a little squishy, but ready for action. It's insides are stiff and ready for a challenge, but the outside shows some love and doesn't want to hurt anyone. Being thick-skinned is usually a bad thing, but not in this case. Especially when that skin is soft and cuddly. It's just like the real deal.

And who doesn't love the velvety feel of silicone? I popped this baby out of the box and felt the need to fondle it for hours, but it had some other ideas and I couldn't resist. It told me we should invite some lube along (it prefers water-based) and things went on without a hitch. Sometimes it's a little unsure without its trusty sidekick around. I was a little concerned about its ridges, but it was all smooth sailing if you catch my drift. I thought it would be a little bit of oww, but it was a whole lot of ooh and ahh! That's something right up everyone's alley, and thigh for that matter.

Oh baby! You mean you brought me a whole 7" of fun? Yes, yes you did! What? A whole 1 3/4" of diameter, too? I'm speechless! It's just what I've always wanted! You know me so well with my love for impressive things and that filled my cup right up. To the brim, even. You know my limits well, love. There's nothing slim about what you give me, but I understand why others might think you're a little too much to handle.

To me, you're the best of both worlds. You feel so genuine and real, yet you wrap all that up in a pretty package. That's what makes you a diamond in the rough. So many others try, but they just don't do it as well as you do. We're into the same things, it seems. You turned form and function into the best of friends. Even though you seem like a softy on the outside, your inner beauty shines through and adds to it all. Could you be any more perfect in that sense? We can run away together. I saved a spot for you in my bag because I want you with me always and you're always ready for adventure, but we must keep this a secret. Others might catch on to what we have here and raise an eyebrow.

The first time we met you took my breath away. I had expectations, I must admit. Others had spoken so highly of you. I take their words with a grain of salt, but you never disappointed me. I was impressed by how well you seemed to know the ins and outs of me. We were so comfortable with each other even though it was our first time and we were still strangers. Again, you just seemed so real. So genuine. We were made for each other, you know. You became my obsession. I was done with all of the others who had tried to win me over. There was always something missing. Ever since, it's been just me and you. You're an endless fountain of pleasure and the most valuable part of my midnight rendezvous. I don't know what I would do with out you. It's as if you complete me.

You treat others just as you treat me. They're glad to have met you and tell me that I'm a lucky girl to have you by my side. You never turn down an invitation and pull it off well. You're always the one to cooperate. You and the harness have become the best of friends and for this I am glad. I was so tired of others who would disagree and refuse to compromise. You pull of everything so well and know how much this means to me. I'm forever grateful for your faithful service.

Bathtime is always fun with you. We love mixing it up. You're always down for toy wipes, antibacterial cleansers, or a nice jump in the hot tub that I call boiling water. It's the best way to make sure you're clean enough to play with others. Can I thank you enough for being silicone? Probably not, but I'll try my best. You're so strong, so resilient, and I know we'll be together for a long time.

I know you and water-based lubes are best friends. You can't stand to be around silicone lubes because you're so much alike that it's not the best for you. Keep on getting your groove on with your friend because I don't want to put you through a difficult situation that would hurt you.

Unlike all the others made of silicone that I've met out there that get attracted to things I don't enjoy, lint and dust just pass you by. You know how much I dislike them and I'm glad you feel the same way. It's comforting because I know we can go anywhere without them getting involved. You love to hang out just about anywhere which is great.

You're one of a kind. You're an original. Your other siblings bearing the O2 line are really amazing. There's something out there for everyone. You're all so unique and genuine. You can get along with just about anyone. I'm glad Tantus raised you the way they did.