Rumor has it that we sea creatures can have a funky odor but I'm proud to say my flexible squishy flesh has no smell at all. There are a few things I'm allergic to, which include larger critters to myself who want to eat me (yeah you're on the list too) as well as any forms of silicone or oil lubricants. Those oil spills have disastrous effects on our pure skin. Water is my friend!

A day in the life of Mr. Tentacle:







So word has gotten around that living on land can really have its ups and downs. Let me tell ya that living under the sea is no real picnic either. Why just yesterday I had two life threatening calls! Firstly, it was Mr. Shark who lives a couple of waves away, set eyes on me. He thought I'd make a tasty snack. In my panic to escape with all my suckers intact, I came face to face with one of those large things that cast nets to entrap marine life. I believe they call them fishing trawlers. So not only do I have to keep a close eye out for those I must live amongst but I must avoid humans who wish to serve me up as food or enslave me for their dirty sexual pleasure.



I haven't got tickets on myself or anything but I am one of the most beautiful species you'll find under the water. With my different shades of smooth blue and some deep purple I bear a slight resemblance to a NZ paua shell. Down my front curve and up over my back towards my tip are two rows of the finest suckers you'll ever feel. They are a pale iridescent green color which will glow easily in the shady depths of the salty sea. It's no wonder everyone wants a piece of me when they capture a glimpse of my glowing glory!







I guess I can't really blame humans for craving my delicious size of 6” in length when stretched out and a girth that gradually grows from 3” at my tip to almost 9” around my base. And you better believe I know how to use every inch to tease the ladies. Not only am I shaped somewhat like a cow horn, but when looking at me from the back I lean slightly more to the right as my tip curves back towards the left. I'm highly flexible with still being able to keep my divine shape.



Normally I'd just take a leisurely bathe in this big ocean I call home if I become filthy. But because some humans insist on plucking me from the depths of my serene watery surroundings, I will require a little more care on your behalf. Just remember one thing: Your other ‘toys' WILL be jealous of my sexy looks, shape and the way I am able to totally satisfy you like no other!

So when you've had your filthy way with me and have recovered from the extreme orgasmic pleasures I delivered, please remember to give me a small pampering of anti-bacterial soap and WARM water, people! If you're not 100% happy with my cleanliness at this stage, I can be sterilized by placing me in the top shelf of your dishwasher (without soap thanks), 10% bleach solution or you could even boil me alive for a few minutes. I promise I will forgive you for this kind of extreme torture.



My parents package us Tentacles, worthy of selling, up in a small clear plastic bag with a piece of paper with the family name and logo on it. It doesn't have any care instructions on it but that's why I'm telling you myself. This bag doesn't allow me much room to move or express myself, but it does prevent any other items in your shipment from contaminating my good looks.

My large size is gradual, so anyone can be pleasured no matter where you are on your toy journey. I'm also happy to tease and please any sex. Although I don't have a flared base as such, my size is rather girthy and would take some effort to fully disappear if you wish to try me anally. My hook like tip is able to hit those secret g-spots while my suckers tantalise the vaginal walls as you thrust.

The Tentacle is such a unique piece of art. Even if it doesn't work perfectly for you as a dildo, you could display it as a conversation starter. I love this one mostly for the look. It does work well as a dildo; i'ts just not my favorite functional, insertable toy.

Even with saying that, I'm giving the Tentacle 5 stars.

I still love my Tentacle, but I believe my love with him is more visual. Each night I fall asleep admiring him glowing brightly within my display cabinet. I'm impressed at how much light he receives through the glass, even though he is behind a number of other dildos. It picks up the light easily and goes on to glow for ages after dark.

Sure is a cute critter!