I’ve long had fantasies of completely anonymous sex, but haven’t really followed through with any of them. I don’t know where to find a gloryhole. The reality of blowing a bunch of strangers is far less appealing than the idea of it is. I’m concerned enough about STDs to make complete powerlessness in a room with a bunch of random guys something I’d prefer to avoid.

I’ve ignored those fantasies and have continued to persevere with my vanilla, non-anonymous sex, life occasionally adding a bit of spice with my dilettante adventures into light BDSM. That’s where Pipedreams’ Fetish Fantasies Spandex Open-Mouth Hood comes into play.

It’s remarkable how a few square inches of spandex can satisfy all of my fantasies of anonymous sex without any real effort on my part. With that hood on, I became any woman. My partner became any man. I became so wrapped up in my head that my reality could be anything that I wanted it to be.

The hood’s construction is solid. The seams are tight and the edges are finished, ensuring that there would be no chafing or irritation from the material. The hood’s main seam runs from the top of your forehead, down your nose and over your mouth. You can feel the seam on your face, but the softness of the material and the finished edges make it completely non-irritating.

The hole for the mouth is finished with the same stitching used on the other edges. The hole is soft and the finishing well made. There should be no problems with chaffing or irritation around the wearer’s mouth. There should also be no concerns about anything or anyone that may be going into the wearer’s mouth being rubbed the wrong way.

It’s really important to note that the hood does not render the wearer unable to see. Light gets in. It’s possible to distinguish some shapes. If you’d like to have an idea of what the visibility is like, put one layer of a black bathing suit up to your eyes and look through. Chances are that you’d be able to navigate your way through a well-lit room without stumbling. You would also probably be able to identify people, although the physical details would be somewhat fuzzy.

Even though the hood does not prevent the wearer from seeing, it can very much enhance the use of blindfolds. This came as a total surprise to me, but who am I to look a gift horse in the mouth?

I had a blindfold that I had been unable to use because the elastic strap kept on slipping off. It wouldn’t stay put on my hair, and it kept on sliding over my ears. With the hood on, the blindfold fits perfectly. Not having hair or ears to compete with, it now stays in one place on my head. It also exploits the fact that the hood had already darkened out some light and finishes the job by eliminating my sight completely.

The only things that I wasn’t crazy about had nothing to do with this hood in particular. I suspect it’s common to all hoods. It can get kind of warm under the spandex. It’s not a big deal, but I wouldn’t suggest you expect to come out of the hood as fabulous and put together as you did entering it.

If your nose has a tendency to run, you might find that there’s some snot build up as well. Yes, it’s gross. I know. It’s also important to mention for the more squeamish among us. If you’ve got a cock in your mouth and you’re going to town on it, your nose might start running. If it does, the hood will catch the nasal drip. That means you’ll have a snotty little wet spot right above your mouth. No big deal.

As it does, the mention of snot leads us to the topic of cleaning. It’s easy. Wash the hood by hand or throw it in the washer on the gentle cycle. Dry on low heat or hang up to dry.