Well, I see a lot of reviews are just straight forward and talk about the product. Well, I hope you are in the mood for a bit of humorous story as an intro to my review, because, dammit, this is my review, and my watch is at story time o'clock.

Let's start off by saying that my timing couldn't have been worse to discover my backdoor.

I had finally scraped up enough money to live away from roommates, and had realized that I had the space necessary to indulge in one of my more hidden fantasies.

I had been curious as to what crossing over the ultimate male macho no-no line would feel like. Letting myself accept it took a little getting used to. While I was definitely not gay, it was hard to deny that the little bit of experimentation at the backdoor by myself was definitely fun.

Reading up on it, I heard all the warnings we are familiar with: Don't put food up there, don't put sharp stuff up there, and don't put anything up there that doesn't have a flared base. I violated quite a few of those guidelines before I decided I didn't want to BE a humorous x-ray, and invest in some actual toys

Keeping all this in mind, my eyes were bigger than my stomach when I went to go order my tools. I wanted the widest I could get, so I got the XL butt plug (from somewhere else, I'm so sorry EdenFantasys). However, a few weeks into this, I discovered something: I needed something to loosen me up. So I purchased an inflatable one to prep me for my monstrous challenge.

And that is how I spent most of my nights: cleaning out, inflating, then bearing down on the XL Butt Plug.

It was disheartening to see little to no progress being made, although I did get to the point that I could sit my entire 220lb. body on it. That taught me that I needed some rigidity to my toy in order to see progress.

Enter my blushing bride. Nervous at how she might react if she saw this hobby of mine, I quickly threw away all my equipment up to that point.

Fast forward to six months, and my old curiosities had gotten to me. I had told my wife that I was very interested in her buying a (large) strap-on and doing me whenever she wanted to. Unfortunately, she is very much on the conservative side of things sexual. She has been inside of a sex store three times. All three times, she has emerged with the most innocuous items possible. A strap-on is a long ways off.

Finally, frustrated with how unadventurous she is, I asked her if it would be ok to get back into self-anal until "she is ready to participate with me". She agreed, although she still didn't (and still doesn't) understand the appeal of anything to do with the hiney.

So now, armed with a hall pass, and having learned the lessons of the past, I decided that I needed something on the extreme end of things, but I also learned that I needed something that would open me up gradually, and be firm, yet flexible.

The Cowboy fits the bill: small for initial penetration, widening slowly, smooth when lubricated, non-porous , flared so it won't slip in, flexible to handle the various turns, and long to give me a challenge.

As with all silicone toys, I was mindful to not use silicone based lube (but use a LOT of lube when you do, you are going to need it!).

After really cleaning myself out (REALLY cleaning myself out), I was ready to try it out.

After learning a bit of muscle control, and proper positioning, I was able to get the first 3 nodules in before I felt anything that was obviously not easily insertable. Comfortably large on initial penetration, it quickly grew into a challenge as it seeks to navigate the various twists and turns of the human intestinal system.

From there on in, it has been a constant fight; One that I am currently in the middle of. My current record is 4 nodules (approx. 10.25").

I expect to insert further as I stretch things out; It's slow going, but I should be able to get it done. The tapered form means that even though I have experience, I can use this to work on opening things up even further and deeper; if I were less experienced, it would help me out, as the only difference would be having to start further up the probe. If you are only going to get one item for deep anal work, I'd suggest this one.

So, I can't speak as a conquering hero, but rather, as someone who is in process to get this thing further in.

It is a great toy if you are wanting to open yourself up further. It will advance as you are comfortable, and does not stretch things in funny ways. It is firm, yet yielding enough to be flexible, and you can very clearly measure your progress via the number of balls inserted.

Okay, just as an FYI for those who contacted me, let me just say: no, I am not secretly gay, and I really don't care how big your unit stacks up to the Cowboy. Thanks for thinking of me though.

I've identified why I'm interested in ramming something that is an anal 18-wheeler, compared to most people's comfortable sedans: it's like how some people stretch their earlobes, although if I did this in public, I'd probably be arrested.

So since then, I have pushed the envelope further . . . At first, three was comfortable and four felt like I was about to push it to my throat. Since then, four is now comfortable; and tonight, I finally got past five, although it did feel like my intestinal system was now going to include a four-pound hunk of silicone.

It has held up well. I was correct in that it is extremely good for people trying to make sure their proctologist can stick the camera inside with nothing but a slight tap. However, the thickness of the base will make one wonder if he'll need a wide-angle lens.

Two thumbs up. Or the arm, depending on how much you can stretch.