Though I've been told many times to do so, I've never went and blown my own 11" penis...until today.

Whatever you want to call it, Novelty, Scherzartikel, or Giocattolo, the blow up playful penis centerpiece, when displayed proudly and prominently at the center of your party table, tells people that you have a large inflatable penis that you are not afraid to show off.

Made from PVC and Chinese industrialism, the blow up playful penis smells exactly like some of my favorite things: water wings, blow up dolls, and inflatable future.

For yours and its safety, the blow up playful penis centerpiece comes wrapped in its own plastic bag to act as a reminder to use protection if you are going to be partying with new people.

One of the first things I noticed about this product is the space for a hole at the very tip of the head. This gave me an idea: with some fishing line and some eyelets screwed into the ceiling, I have this attached to the door so that when people come through the door to wish everyone in my apartment “Happy Holidays”, they know exactly how happy I am to see them; Cal Exotics' blow up playful penis centerpiece rises up and down whenever anyone comes through the door.

One of my favorite features of this product is the weighted base. Cal Exotics' blow up playful penis centerpiece is for novelty only. I would definitely NOT recommend using this for anything intimate or exploratory.

With all of the holiday parties passed, it’s still not too early to plan for your parties in the New Year! Don’t forget to include your new inflatable friend with the constipated face at each and every party in 2010! Put a big black hat and beard on it for Presidents’ Day. For Valentine’s Day, give it a heart on its shaft.