Sex toys for educational purposes?

Contributor: spiceboy spiceboy
In an old interview with Eden Fantasys founder Fred Petrenko he says that he doesn't see sex toys as educational, but that's actually my primary experience with them. I've always been uncomfortable with the notion of discovering your body with a partner, especially with someone who is more experienced and set on "molding" or "training" their partner to satisfy their desires. Sex toys are a safe, comfortable way to help you understand your body in your own time.

Did anyone else use sex toys as educational tools before getting comfortable with partners?
12/27/2011
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Contributor: Cherrylane Cherrylane
Quote:
Originally posted by spiceboy
In an old interview with Eden Fantasys founder Fred Petrenko he says that he doesn't see sex toys as educational, but that's actually my primary experience with them. I've always been uncomfortable with the notion of discovering your body ... more
I think it depends on what you mean by educational.

And it depends on what sort of toys you're using.

Personally, I do not find vibrators educational in terms of finding out what you like/ "knowing your body" because no person will ever be able to replicate that feeling. It's sexual, satisfying and useful, but independent.

certain types of dildos and penetration devices could definitely be educational. However, I still don't feel it's as educational as "discovering yourself with a partner." If your partner is open and supportive and wants you to truly discover your body, they will not try and "mold" you any more than you will try and get them to do just what you want and like. The best way to learn what you like with sex is to have sex, imo. I don't like to be fucked in the same way I like to be fingered.

But as a "i'm going to get comfortable with sexual feelings and my body independent of someone regardless of whether it's really relevant to how sex will actually play out" sort of way, then yes. They're very helpful.
12/27/2011
Contributor: spiceboy spiceboy
Quote:
Originally posted by Cherrylane
I think it depends on what you mean by educational.

And it depends on what sort of toys you're using.

Personally, I do not find vibrators educational in terms of finding out what you like/ "knowing your body" because no ... more
You're right, toys offer a unique experience that doesn't imitate sex with a partner, but I meant educational in a more general sense. I think discoveries like where your g spot is and what angles, sensations, and positions you like are good to make on your own; the confidence that comes with understanding your body will enhance the way you experience sex with a partner, and there's less nervousness about not knowing what to expect.

I agree that the best way to learn what you like with sex is to have sex, but I disagree that sex with a partner has to be the most important expression of sex, and it's certainly not the only expression of sex! You can learn just as much by having sex with yourself! Whether you like internal or external stimulation or a combination of the two, what sizes require more lubrication for insertion, or what speed of thrusting you prefer can all be translated to sex with a partner.

The emotional aspects of sexuality complicate things! I'm not saying everyone needs to figure things out on their own—some would rather be taught or shown by someone else and find it easier or sexier—but it sure can't hurt to have a little experience! For me, emotional resistance to sex and intimacy made it essential for me to understand what I was doing before letting anyone else get close.
12/27/2011
Contributor: Cherry21 Cherry21
Quote:
Originally posted by spiceboy
In an old interview with Eden Fantasys founder Fred Petrenko he says that he doesn't see sex toys as educational, but that's actually my primary experience with them. I've always been uncomfortable with the notion of discovering your body ... more
yes and no. some may be good for themselves, but I don't ever really use my toys without my guy, so...
12/27/2011
Contributor: hey steady hey steady
Quote:
Originally posted by spiceboy
In an old interview with Eden Fantasys founder Fred Petrenko he says that he doesn't see sex toys as educational, but that's actually my primary experience with them. I've always been uncomfortable with the notion of discovering your body ... more
No on the contrary in fact! Was over thirty when my partner brought me my first vibrator and it has taken me a while to adapt myself to it's use...however when I get it right, my god I wish I had discovered them earlier x
12/27/2011
Contributor: tammyandy69 tammyandy69
Quote:
Originally posted by spiceboy
In an old interview with Eden Fantasys founder Fred Petrenko he says that he doesn't see sex toys as educational, but that's actually my primary experience with them. I've always been uncomfortable with the notion of discovering your body ... more
I would have to disagrea about toys not being educational. Here I am 46 year old female that is with a man 6yrs younger then me. He knows more about my body then I do. He is teaching me things and how to do things with toys and with him. Every new toy is a new experience, and the larning comes from how many ways you can work the toy, were always learning.
01/05/2012
Contributor: Rin (aka Nire) Rin (aka Nire)
I've made tons of progress learning about my own sexuality through toys, so I definitely think of them as having educational applications, even if you don't set out with the intention of learning.

Though truthfully, when I clicked on this thread I was half-expecting to be talking about sex toys being used for demonstrations in sex-ed classes - which could potentially be seen as wildly inappropriate, but also hilarious and awesome.
01/05/2012