The New Intimacy

Losing Your Virginity More than Once?

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Contributor: ~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
I was watching something The Glades with my boyfriend a few days ago. There was scene where the main character (a guy) asks this girl if she has lost her virginity. She replys "Sure plenty of times". She isn't implying that she is a slut, just that she feels that sex with certain people after her first was like losing it again.

Do you believe in this?

I didn't until I gave it some more thought. Having sex with my current partner was kind of like losing my virginity again. It was an all new complete surrender of my trust. It had been so long since I had that with a new person, and it was a totally unreal sexual experience that I had never had with anyone for our first time, or at all. It's like, everyone else didn't compare.
07/13/2010
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Contributor: bzzingbee bzzingbee
While I wouldn't ever consider myself a true virgin after the real first time, I definitely agree that sex with a new partner for the first time can be just as exciting and scary. And it can be just as big of a deal too, kind of like a milestone in your relationship.
07/13/2010
Contributor: Annemarie Annemarie
Quote:
Originally posted by bzzingbee
While I wouldn't ever consider myself a true virgin after the real first time, I definitely agree that sex with a new partner for the first time can be just as exciting and scary. And it can be just as big of a deal too, kind of like a ... more
Especially if you know the partner is going to be someone you'll remember forever (like a future long-term relationship).

I can kinda see it, yeah. But still, it's limited to like two other chances, maybe. Not bazillions.
07/13/2010
Contributor: Chilipepper Chilipepper
I considered myself a virgin twice. The Real First Time when I lost it at 18. And the second time after not having any sex at all for over ten years; I was a tight Neo-Virgin that time.

It was with the same guy both times. He did ask 'How many times do I have to take your virginity??'
07/13/2010
Contributor: Alicia Alicia
I never really considered it like that. But, I have felt like I've had my first orgasm a few times. Like there was the kind I had with the first guy. It wasn't all that strong but it was there. Then I dated this other guy and it was like "oh THAT is what it is supposed to feel like!" and then I met my husband and it was like "ok forget that last one THIS is what it's supposed to feel like!!"
07/13/2010
Contributor: Kim! Kim!
I've never really looked at it as losing my virginity multiple times. It was more of a learning about sex and learning about what I like during sexy through the years. The first guy we did it once and it was like eh, I am not sure that I get the hype. The next it was like okay, this is sorta great, I don't mind it. Then I got to the HOLY CRAP THIS IS AMAZING NOW I REALLY GET THE HYPE! level with number three.
Later on with the first person I actually fell truly and deeply in love with someone everything felt really new and amazing and then I really got it. It's too bad that he was in love with someone else who wouldn't have him. Now my relationship is still fairly new, but I wonder what it's like for him. He says he really likes my openness and willingness to explore so this must be a new thing to him.
07/13/2010
Contributor: Blinker Blinker
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
I was watching something The Glades with my boyfriend a few days ago. There was scene where the main character (a guy) asks this girl if she has lost her virginity. She replys "Sure plenty of times". She isn't implying that she is a ... more
I've never given thought to losing my virginity. I never really thought about it as a big deal. I was just horny and wanted to have sex so I did.

I guess when I finally consumated my relationship with my guy now it was more like losing my virginity because I completely gave myself to him and just became his and only his. Thinking baout other guys that I've slept with now it's like...Why did I bother? I have mixed feelings on this I guess.
07/13/2010
Contributor: gone77 gone77
I guess it really depends on the individual's definition of virginity. If they wanna say they've lost their virginity multiple times, more power to them. They had just better be ready to explain it over and over again if they plan on telling people this. lol
07/13/2010
Contributor: Blinker Blinker
Quote:
Originally posted by gone77
I guess it really depends on the individual's definition of virginity. If they wanna say they've lost their virginity multiple times, more power to them. They had just better be ready to explain it over and over again if they plan on telling ... more
Lol that's a good point.

Of course there's this medical thing to "revirginize" yourself, and lots of women get the procdeure done as a gift to their husbands-to-be. I think it's a little extreme and downright PAINFUL to think about, but, to each their own!
07/13/2010
Contributor: *Ashley* *Ashley*
Reminds me of that Madonna song 'like a virgin'

But I agree, to a degree. I wouldn't walk around telling everyone who asks that I am a virgin. But on the other hand I do believe in reclaimed virginity. For those who lost it in some accident (falling down) or was taken unwilling. Even the ones who fell like it was a mistake losing it to begin with and then saves themselves for marriage.

I guess there are different ways you can look at it.
07/13/2010
Contributor: Gary Gary
Quote:
Originally posted by *Ashley*
Reminds me of that Madonna song 'like a virgin'

But I agree, to a degree. I wouldn't walk around telling everyone who asks that I am a virgin. But on the other hand I do believe in reclaimed virginity. For those who lost it in ... more
This thread reminded me of that one girl on True Blood.
07/15/2010
Contributor: Chilipepper Chilipepper
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
This thread reminded me of that one girl on True Blood.
Or 'Monster Squad', when they had to have a female virgin recite some German ritual to banish the monsters ... and the chosen girl wasn't ...

"You're not a virgin?!?!"
"I didn't think that time would count!"
07/15/2010
Contributor: AussieSarah AussieSarah
When i read the title i initially thought you must mean vaginal, anal and maybe even oral...... but oh how wrong i was

I think you only really are a virgin once before your first sexual intercourse...although i think i could be convinced to say there could be twice (vaginal and anal) because they are two completely different things to me and anal takes a lot more trust and more to 'let go of' to your partner
07/16/2010
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
"I lost my virginity a year before I lost my virginity" - Eddie Izzard

If you don't know who Eddie Izzard is, check'm out!
07/16/2010
Contributor: Gary Gary
Quote:
Originally posted by Chilipepper
Or 'Monster Squad', when they had to have a female virgin recite some German ritual to banish the monsters ... and the chosen girl wasn't ...

"You're not a virgin?!?!"
"I didn't think that time would count!"
Oh Yeah! I love that movie!
07/16/2010
Contributor: Ladyblu Ladyblu
I have a friend, who stopped having sex, and kind of decided she doesn't want that in her life. She doesn't call herself a virgin, but is now saving herself until marriage, which I think is her way of wanting to feel like one again, because sex really isn't something she wanted in her life, and lost it in a way of life she doesn't really like or want to be a part of anymore. So in a weird way, she's a mental virgin which is the same for her and I'm glad it works.

I for one am glad that I haven't had that be a descriptor of me in quite some time, and isn't something I want to go back to. I might have the feeling of a new experience or wonderment, but I don't attribute it to virginity in my own mind.
07/17/2010
Contributor: Velocity Velocity
I very much think you can lose it again. Just not physically. I feel as though it is a mental place holder.

I know that when I first had sex with my current partner it was like nothing I've ever experienced. I actually love and care for him and to join in that moment felt totally new.
07/12/2012
Contributor: ViVix ViVix
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
I was watching something The Glades with my boyfriend a few days ago. There was scene where the main character (a guy) asks this girl if she has lost her virginity. She replys "Sure plenty of times". She isn't implying that she is a ... more
I can see where the emotions may be the same, but I think the only thing that would bother me is if someone advertised themselves as a virgin regardless of partners (yes, I do know a girl like this).
07/23/2012
Contributor: clockwork451 clockwork451
I remember the first time I heard about that revirginization surgery I was horrified. Some people...
07/23/2012
Contributor: heather-mooney heather-mooney
I don't think so. Virginity doesn't have to be this weird ritualistic thing that has such a stigma around it. Sex with some people can be more/just as meaningful as with other people, but I don't think labeling it as such is very helpful.
07/23/2012