The New Intimacy

Embarrassing Moments

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Contributor: MissStormRyder MissStormRyder
A few years ago around Christmas I was going through a breakup with my boyfriend. Every year on the 24th my family and family friends gather for little party and gift exchange that year I had to work til 5:00pm so I was in a rush to get home and changed for the party. When I arrived at home I found a package at my door....no card...no note, just a nicely wrapped package. So I picked it up figuring it was from a friend and dashed to get ready for the evenings fun. Just why I took this package with me I still don't know?
After a few hours of making merry at the party we began the gift exchange. Everyone was opening their gifts when my cousin noticed the package I had found at my door and asked about it..I told her the story and she told me to go ahead and open it..I thought..hey why not? So I did..And what do I find??
A rather large dildo with a short note from my ex.."Since you won't be getting a real cock for a while you can go fuck yourself with this one!" the note said...
Now it wouldn't have been so bad if it were just me and my friends but my parents and grandparents were there...Poor grandma!! Everyone got a good laugh out of it...and I can't say it was the worst gift ever...I still have it and yes,..I did go fuck myself with it...quite often!! LoL


Anyone got an embarrassing story like this???
10/04/2011
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Contributor: Rin (aka Nire) Rin (aka Nire)
Geeze... Not a bad gift, but the intent was quite mean-spirited! *imaginary pelting of mean guy with a rock*

Anyhoo, I think the closest I've ever come was the day I was masturbating while watching porn on my computer, which is in the basement. My dad comes in through the back door when he gets home, so I figured I'd just unlock the laundry room door to be safe, and that I'd be done and unlock it long before he got home.

Figures he'd get off work early that day, doesn't it? Before I'm done I hear him trying to turn the knob, and then knocking on it. Managed to finish in two seconds flat and then hurriedly pull my pants up and switch websites before unlocking the door. I covered up saying that I'd been fiddling with the doorknob and hadn't realized I'd left it locked. He seemed annoyed, but didn't question it further. Nowadays I probably would've said I was changing my shirt real quick or something - a lot more believable, since my basement gets pretty warm.

Not that he'd blame me for watching porn, but I'd be a little too embarrassed to tell him I'd just been masturbating, y'know?
10/04/2011
Contributor: The-IT-Guy-And-My-Secretary The-IT-Guy-And-My-Secretary
Quote:
Originally posted by MissStormRyder
A few years ago around Christmas I was going through a breakup with my boyfriend. Every year on the 24th my family and family friends gather for little party and gift exchange that year I had to work til 5:00pm so I was in a rush to get home and ... more
Maybe it just because im a guy but I would have taken some epoxy and epoxied the dildo onto the hood of that assholes car. Bet he will think thats hilarious. (Fucking jerkoff)
10/04/2011
Contributor: wrecklesswords wrecklesswords
haha, oh my, I can't think of anything quite that bad other than the first time my gf and I ever had sex before we got together. We had sex on my couch, and her fingernails were a bit long so I bled a little on the couch. The next day, some of my friends came over and one of their faces just went 'O.O' and she said "dear god it looks like someone got murdered here!"

I had honestly done my best to get the stain out with what I had at my house at the time. That night I bought some more stain remover and got the rest of it out.
10/04/2011