The New Intimacy

Does it annoy you when people review toys not designed for their sex?

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Contributor: Incendiaire Incendiaire
I'm thinking mostly here about male toys, specifically things along the line of prostate massagers, but consider the question broadly.

Compared to how many hundreds of different rabbits and vibrators there are available on the market, designed for and aimed solely at women, there are maybe a dozen or so prostate massagers for men. More often than not, when you look at reviews for these items, the first few start with something along the lines of "This is supposed to be a prostate massager, but it's also great for my g-spot, and here's why..."

Personally this sort of thing frustrates me, as I want to know if the prostate massager is any good on the prostate, which is not something that someone without a prostate can tell me. It may be good for other things, but that's irrelevant to me. It can seem as though what few male voices there are on the male toys, get drowned out by people discussing what other purposes they've put them too.

And likewise - because this is not intended to be a one sided discussion - would it irritate women if they read a lot of rabbit reviews written by men? Because obviously someone without a clitoris cannot judge the usefulness of those little bunny ears.
04/10/2012
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Contributor: Rin (aka Nire) Rin (aka Nire)
Doesn't bother me in the least. I can understand why you're frustrated, but if someone is able to use a toy effectively, even if it's not explicitly designed for their body, then I see nothing wrong with them choosing to review it.

And I'd actually be quite fascinated if a guy found a way to enjoy a rabbit vibe. That'd be just plain cool.
04/10/2012
Contributor: Nazaress Nazaress
I can see how that would be annoying. I think the problem lies, however, not with women reviewing these toys but with that fact that so little men do. I wish there was a way that we could get men more interested in the world of sex toys so that this site, and the community in general, wasn't so overrun with women. More male voices would be nice to have and it would urge the site to carry more men's toys than they do now.

Of course, a woman can have an opinion on a "man's" toy if she has a penis, etc., so not all women's opinions on these toys are invalid. And for that matter, some people really DO want to know if a toy can also work for their G-spot so this information is useful. But I can definitely see the frustration with more reviews being written by women than men for these toys. I wouldn't find much use for a rabbit review when it was used anally, though others might.
04/10/2012
Contributor: Lickable Lollie Lickable Lollie
some g-spot toys can be used for p-spot play....
04/10/2012
Contributor: underHim underHim
Quote:
Originally posted by Lickable Lollie
some g-spot toys can be used for p-spot play....
This is what I was thinking and also vice versa. I have seen a couple of prostate toys that make me very curious about how they would feel on a woman.
04/10/2012
Contributor: Zombirella Zombirella
I have reviewed masturbators because my fiance didn't always have an account here or I have points on my account and nothing I want so I get him something. I sit there and I make him tell me the specifics of what it feels like texture wise, the fit, did he like it and what about it did he not like if anything.
04/10/2012
Contributor: Antipova Antipova
Quote:
Originally posted by Nazaress
I can see how that would be annoying. I think the problem lies, however, not with women reviewing these toys but with that fact that so little men do. I wish there was a way that we could get men more interested in the world of sex toys so that this ... more
Perfect down to the last drop... but in the very last sentence, I would enjoy reading a review of a rabbit used anally.
04/10/2012
Contributor: js250 js250
I feel that the toys should be reviewed by the people who use them effectively. Whichever sex they are. Honest and effective reviews are what EF is about, not segregated reviews. If more men reviewed and wrote reviews, then there would be more options when reading the reviews.
04/10/2012
Contributor: Nazaress Nazaress
Quote:
Originally posted by Antipova
Perfect down to the last drop... but in the very last sentence, I would enjoy reading a review of a rabbit used anally.
Oh, I'm sure lots of people would, even women. That little part was for me, personally. I don't use anything anally and so this information isn't important to me (unless I were thinking of my boyfriend). But I can definitely see the appeal for others. And thank you.
04/10/2012
Contributor: Vanille Vanille
This doesn't bother me at all, I actually embrace reviews from ANY gender identity.
04/10/2012
Contributor: wrmbreze wrmbreze
Quote:
Originally posted by Incendiaire
I'm thinking mostly here about male toys, specifically things along the line of prostate massagers, but consider the question broadly.

Compared to how many hundreds of different rabbits and vibrators there are available on the market, ... more
I believe that sometimes they may be doing the review from the point of view of the spouse/sig. other. I see no problem with a wife telling you what her husband though of a toy or vice versa.
04/10/2012
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
(EF Review Program Mentor)
Quote:
Originally posted by Incendiaire
I'm thinking mostly here about male toys, specifically things along the line of prostate massagers, but consider the question broadly.

Compared to how many hundreds of different rabbits and vibrators there are available on the market, ... more
While it may be irrelevant to you it is actually very much interesting to me! I love prostate massagers to use as G spot toys because they just seem to work better for me. One of our goals way back when was to offer reviews that would appeal to the widest possible market but we have very few dedicated male bodied reviewers in comparison to the female bodied ones!

I have no problem reading a review written by a man who likes a toy marketed toward a woman...I find them fascinating as long as the safety issues are considered. Lots of clitoral toys aren't meant to be inserted anally but hell I'd love to know what a guy would do with a pair of bunny ears!

If you really think that a product aimed at men is not really being represented properly contact an administrator (probably best bet contacting JR) and ask if you can have a chance to review the product yourself. Most of the time if they see a clear bias or lack they will agree. At the very least you could buy the toy at a 30% discount and give it a proper review! It's what I, personally, do if I think I'd like to try a product that doesn't seem to have very many good reviews.
04/10/2012
Contributor: Shellz31 Shellz31
Doesn't bother me in the slightest. Actually, I quite like it when someone with the female anatomy reviews toys like that cause then I can judge whether it will be suited to me.
And same if a guy was to review a toy built more for females.

I say share the fun!
04/10/2012
Contributor: shySEXXaddict shySEXXaddict
see this is what I was planning on doing..my bf has never used sex toys before and im trying to introduce him.I plan on getting him a masterbator on here and getting his opinion word for word if possible and writting a review on it from a first timers perspective as I know he wouldnt start an account on here..not yet anyway. I think its fine as long if its not something a woman can try on her self she has a male that tries it and just writes the review other wise thats what reviews are..peoples opinion on something..could be 1 person likes it 10 hate it..they are just giving there opinion on the product and if you choose to try it you might not have the same experience so therefore its good to have different peoples point of view
04/10/2012
Contributor: Ms. N Ms. N
Nah...I even like it when a guy does lingerie reviews, whether for his SO, or if he has been wearing the item himself. If the info in the review is accurate, then it is still going to be a useful review in some way.
04/10/2012
Contributor: Ryuson Ryuson
(Review Program Mentor)
I think that a lot of the problem is that there are so FEW male reviewers on here. If it was 50/50 the male opinion on those pages would drown out the few women who decided to review it using it vaginally.

As far as high ranking men go there's... ToyTimeTim... Kindred... Jimbo Jones... Sir... TheCoz... That's all that I can think of off the top of my head, and I can think of hundreds of women! Sorry to hear about your problem, though, and I can understand your frustration.
04/10/2012
Contributor: Tork48309 Tork48309
As a male, I review women's lingerie knowing that women want a man's opinion. But, yes there is an appropriate Non response the should be considered among certain items if info is not helpful to the subject.
04/10/2012
Contributor: unfulfilled unfulfilled
It doesn't bother me at all. I don't care if a male wrote about a g-spot product and in the review detailed how well it worked for his p-spot. EF has contributors write about a product and why or why not it doesn't work for them. As long as they're open and honest, then I'll read it regardless if the product may be designed for me or not.
04/11/2012
Contributor: Silverdrop Silverdrop
I think the Descriptive Review should be someone using the toy "as designed". Otherwise, I think recruiting more male reviewers is an excellent idea. I'm trying to coax the bf into it.
04/11/2012
Contributor: Beck Beck
Most male toys that are used for Prostrate stimulation are great for the G-spot, so that is useful, just not to those with male anatomy. I think the problem is that there are so few male reviewers and even fewer who use anal toys. It is understandable that you are frustrated about it.
04/11/2012
Contributor: connies7388 connies7388
Quote:
Originally posted by Nazaress
I can see how that would be annoying. I think the problem lies, however, not with women reviewing these toys but with that fact that so little men do. I wish there was a way that we could get men more interested in the world of sex toys so that this ... more
LOL "...if she has a penis" What do you mean by that? If a woman does have a "penis" it is more than likely it is a strap on and a masturbation sleeve (Fleshlight, Spider, Head Honcho....and others) would not be effective in getting her off.

What in the world did you mean by a woman having a penis?
04/11/2012
Contributor: TransMarc TransMarc
Quote:
Originally posted by connies7388
LOL "...if she has a penis" What do you mean by that? If a woman does have a "penis" it is more than likely it is a strap on and a masturbation sleeve (Fleshlight, Spider, Head Honcho....and others) would not be effective in ... more
Some trans women have penises. Some intersex women as well. (though if anybody reading is, I don't know whether I speak ignorantly? it would really suck if it was the case.)
Your message can be read as kind of offensive, too, even if you didn't intend its "Internetone" to be. (and I hope mine isn't.)
04/11/2012
Contributor: Nazaress Nazaress
Quote:
Originally posted by connies7388
LOL "...if she has a penis" What do you mean by that? If a woman does have a "penis" it is more than likely it is a strap on and a masturbation sleeve (Fleshlight, Spider, Head Honcho....and others) would not be effective in ... more
I'm sorry to say this but this response is very cissexist. I am sure that you meant no harm, though, and perhaps you are just uneducated on the matter but there are many women with penises and many men with vaginas. I speak, of course, of non-op transgendered people. TransMarc is also right in saying that some intersex women are born this way, as well. Your genitals do not define your gender and so it is not strange for a woman to have a penis and still be a woman.
04/11/2012
Contributor: BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
I write the reviews for all our toys. I just get clear details from Mr on how they felt. Also, understand, just like with toys used and designed for women, all bodies are different and what might feel good to you might not to another man, and vice versa. If you know what shape and length works for you, even reading a review by a woman using it on her G-spot can be useful to you because she'll (if she's thorough) be describing the firmness, the circumference or diameter, the texture, the size, and any other info needed for you to make an educated guess.

I find that most men are not open about their love of prostate play, and even though things are anonymous here, there's still the potential that a men may not be writing because they're embarrassed that they like things in their bum based on the stigma society puts on it.
04/11/2012
Contributor: Gracie Gracie
I can see why as a man it would be frustrating to look for a male opinion on a product and see more female opinions. It doesn't bother me, but I see your point. What annoys me is when I read reviews that are for a defective product. What is the point of that. I don't get why the reviewer didn't replace the product before reviewing!
04/15/2012
Contributor: Sally Forth Sally Forth
I'm a woman and I've reviewed a couple "male toys". I would never review anything for which I wasn't part of the experience, and honestly probably wouldn't review a prostate massager even if I was there, because I could really offer very little in terms of how it felt. I have reviewed a masturbator and a cock ring, that I have used with partners (one partner per toy in case you were about to say eew). I bought them both -didn't do free reviews, and included both my partners' comments on the toys and my own comments on my perceptions of the toys and my experiences with including them in our sex play. I get that men likely want men's opinions of toys designed for their bodies, but as a woman who likes to buy her friends toys that we can use together (or in the case of the masturbator, mostly separately, but at least once together -it's a long distance thing),I like to see reviews of toys for men from both points of view. I wanna know how the men like it, yes. But I also want to know how men's partners feel that a toy adds or takes away from an experience together. That's why I've done it, and that's why I like when other women do, as long as it's in the context of a sexual experience with someone for whom the toy was designed. I've also noticed when reading reviews from "women" that often times they're a part of a hetero couple and the man has actually written all or most of the review.
04/18/2012
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by Antipova
Perfect down to the last drop... but in the very last sentence, I would enjoy reading a review of a rabbit used anally.
I have been wanting to do one for some time. Finding one that has not already been assigned is pretty hard though.

I don't have to much problem with this. The G-spot is very much like the prostate in location and is stimulated much the same ways. Plus I know mostly just by looking whether it will work for me.

I can understand the dilemma here, I guess the best thing would be not to read that review. Another option is to find a way to get more guys doing reviews
04/18/2012
Contributor: Sally Forth Sally Forth
Quote:
Originally posted by Nazaress
I'm sorry to say this but this response is very cissexist. I am sure that you meant no harm, though, and perhaps you are just uneducated on the matter but there are many women with penises and many men with vaginas. I speak, of course, of non-op ... more
I was going to make the same point. from the point of view of a ciswoman --someone born with female sexual anatomy who identifies as female; yes, I have a strap on, and yes, I nearly did my boyfriend's masturbator with it. I decided that since I wouldn't be able to feel it like he could, I'd only be frustrated by my attempt. I'm pretty sure though, that I'm going to buy one for this specific purpose because I think it would be a super hot way to lube up a dildo when I'm about to get down with a lady (as I said in my review). I've never thought about changing my sex, and I'm happy with the equipment I have, but I must say, the Super Head Honcho toy (my only masturbator experience other than the orange Tenga egg which we have as the "display model" at work) made me wish for a cock. A real one that's attached to me that I can feel. I fingered the toy, and found it extremely erotic. I would have sold my right arm at that time for a cock. That was a new feeling for me. The point is, anyone can experience gender, gender identity, sexuality, sexual identification, sexual preferences in different ways on different days. It's not up to any person to judge what any other person might feel at any given time.
04/19/2012
Contributor: GONE! GONE!
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
I feel that the toys should be reviewed by the people who use them effectively. Whichever sex they are. Honest and effective reviews are what EF is about, not segregated reviews. If more men reviewed and wrote reviews, then there would be more ... more
This! If someone can find good use for a toy other than what the manufacturer explicitly intended for it, I honestly would like to hear about it. It gives people the opportunity to find toys they would not have otherwise considered.
04/19/2012
Contributor: guro guro
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
I feel that the toys should be reviewed by the people who use them effectively. Whichever sex they are. Honest and effective reviews are what EF is about, not segregated reviews. If more men reviewed and wrote reviews, then there would be more ... more
amen to this.
04/19/2012