Do you think it's important to have kids?

Contributor: Stinkytofu10 Stinkytofu10
Quote:
Originally posted by sweetpea12
Do you think that it's important to have kids? I really have never been interested in children in any way, whatsoever. And people keep pressuring me and getting freaked out that I have this opinion. I just really never want kids, and I never want ... more
They are not necessary, but they are nice perhaps.
05/18/2012
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by sweetpea12
Do you think that it's important to have kids? I really have never been interested in children in any way, whatsoever. And people keep pressuring me and getting freaked out that I have this opinion. I just really never want kids, and I never want ... more
I think that it is very important for some folks to have kids and it's not so important for others. I also think it's imperative that some people never attempt to raise kids!!

If you are one of those folks who has a "calling" (for lack of a better word) to have kids then it's probably pretty important to your happiness but for heaven's sake having a child if you don't want one will not make angels sing! Live the life YOU want to live and to hell with what other people want. Why the hell would anyone want to foist parenting off on someone who clearly doesn't want to participate? The human race is in no danger of dying out FFS!
05/18/2012
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by T&A1987
I agree that the growing and holding and raising the baby is probably the key aspect to this whole equation. Imagine that everyone has a value for those feelings and other feelings associated with parenthood. either a scale of 1-100, or perhaps a ... more
For those of us who have children and love them, it has nothing to do with "making money." Nobody has kids to increase their income.

Some things have a lot of worth, but have no monetary value. Being in love doesn't make you money, either, but many people choose this lifestyle.

If you don't want kids, that's fine. But, please understand that for those of us who do want children, the value of being a parent transcends things many of is see as shallow as cash.
05/20/2012
Contributor: epiphanyjayne epiphanyjayne
I voted how I feel about my life. I don't think everyone needs to have kids to be happy.
06/24/2012
Contributor: marshmallow marshmallow
People will always have problems with everything you do. Do what makes you happy!
06/24/2012
Contributor: CoffeeCup CoffeeCup
People get down right offended when I say I don't want children! I don't get it, they don't get offended when I make other life choices that are different from theirs.
06/24/2012
Contributor: sexykiss sexykiss
for me it is necessarily for me to be happy i want children
06/24/2012
Contributor: T&A1987 T&A1987
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
For those of us who have children and love them, it has nothing to do with "making money." Nobody has kids to increase their income.

Some things have a lot of worth, but have no monetary value. Being in love doesn't make you ... more
I didn't mean that children would make me money, I meant how much would i be willing to give up to have kids. it costs about $15,000 per year to raise a kid, so if the experience isn't worth at least that $15,000 per year in psychic benefits (the mental satisfaction of having kids, however it's measured) then having kids wouldn't be worth the effort.
06/24/2012
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by T&A1987
I didn't mean that children would make me money, I meant how much would i be willing to give up to have kids. it costs about $15,000 per year to raise a kid, so if the experience isn't worth at least that $15,000 per year in psychic benefits ... more
That may be your interpretation of having kids; in which case, don't have them. I misunderstood. I thought you were saying "Kids don't bring in any cash, therefor it is worthless for anyone to have them." If it's your personal interpretation to YOUR life only, I understand.

I could put up the same chart you did, but with instead of dollar signs and get a much different answer. But, having children is a personal choice.

If you don't want them, please don't have them. But, for those of us who do love and value our children, we have much different view, and I think most would agree, only people who LOVE children and are willing to make the sacrifices of having them should have them.
06/24/2012
Contributor: BlooJay BlooJay
It depends on the person. I think some people would be happier without children and some people would be happier with children.
06/24/2012
Contributor: T&A1987 T&A1987
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
That may be your interpretation of having kids; in which case, don't have them. I misunderstood. I thought you were saying "Kids don't bring in any cash, therefor it is worthless for anyone to have them." If it's your personal ... more
I still think you're misunderstanding. the dollar thing was not only one way to gauge it, I only used the dollar because I figured it was a more quantifiable measure than love. What i'm saying is, place SOME value on the entirety of child rearing and contrast this with everything given up in order to raise children. if someone doesn't consider the benefits of raising a child, however they're measured, greater than the costs, however they're measured then they probably should not have children, or at least consider it more extensively.

Also, you make it sound like because I used a quantifiable, albeit sterile measure, rather than the vague and abstract "love" i'm a bad person.

Finally, those hearts look like inflamed butts.
06/24/2012
Contributor: HippieFeet HippieFeet
I don't think everyone should have kids just because they are able to. I wish more people would make the choice to adopt kids that are already here and provide for them instead of just adding more.
06/24/2012
Contributor: Pinkshirt Pinkshirt
Kids are definitely not necessary to have a happy life. I chose to not have children I guess because I didn't have the "maternal instinct" that people talk about. I am happily married and I love my life. I don't need a little being to make it better.
06/24/2012
Contributor: LadyDarknezz LadyDarknezz
I put no since you can be happy without children. Some people SHOULDN'T have children since they are terrible parents. ( Like one of my siblings...Ugh.) Personally, I have some reproductive issues, so it is unlikely that I'll ever be able to have children, but I'm complete okay with it.
06/24/2012
Contributor: Missmarc Missmarc
Whatever makes you happy, makes you happy, and that doesn't have to include kids.
06/24/2012
Contributor: asphyxia asphyxia
I answered 'no', but there are so many excellent responses here! I love these forums because I get to hear so many wildly diverse and yet equally valid viewpoints. It's always fascinating!

As soon as I read your title, I started thinking about the couple from the movie Idiocracy. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it! Both for the entertainment factor, and the social commentary.

Personally, I don't think it's necessary for everyone to have children. I do think it's incredibly presumptuous for people to try and pressure you into doing something as life-altering as having children! I hope you can politely express your feelings about the matter and ask that these people respect your feelings.

I respect you for taking the time to think about the issue and work out how you feel about it. I wish there were more people in the world that took the decision to have children as seriously as you have.
06/24/2012
Contributor: Nyxx Nyxx
My family wants me to have children, but I don't want any, so I won't. I don't think you need children. Some women do, because some women feel that they need to be mothers, and they need something to take care of. I'm not like that.
06/24/2012
Contributor: Miss Anonymous Miss Anonymous
I agree, you don't need kids to live a happy life. I know a lot of people who don't have children and they are happy.
06/24/2012
Contributor: FHeemz FHeemz
Dont think you NEED to have them, though personally I want some.
06/24/2012
Contributor: woodsdragon woodsdragon
It obviously depends on the person/relationship. However, I have always know that I want children and make it something that my partner had to want as well. We have talked about it often. We have several things that we want to establish before we start our family...be stable in our relationship, have space in our home, have full-time jobs/make enough money. We are getting married in about 3 months and I am hoping to have our first child in the next 2 years.
06/25/2012
Contributor: brevado brevado
In fact, I feel you should be happy in life BEFORE you have kids
06/25/2012
Contributor: RomanticGoth RomanticGoth
Yes and no. I do not want children, but I'm raising my nephew. So... I think there are a lot of people out there that shouldn't be having them.

I keep getting pressured to have some of my own. Nobody listens when I say I don't want them.
06/25/2012
Contributor: dirtythoughts:) dirtythoughts:)
Quote:
Originally posted by Gracie
I agree with many of the things already said. Its a yes and no answer. Yes sombody needs to have children. No, not everybody needs children. In fact i see parenting all the time that reinforces the idea that not everyone is cut out to be a ... more
Agree entirely! and its pretty important for me to become a mother as well, someday
06/25/2012
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by T&A1987
I still think you're misunderstanding. the dollar thing was not only one way to gauge it, I only used the dollar because I figured it was a more quantifiable measure than love. What i'm saying is, place SOME value on the entirety of child ... more
I don't think you're a bad person at all. I admire people who admit they don't want children. I think it's a healthy response for some people. It's worse when people have children anyway, that they didn't want under pressure from others.

IN NO WAY do I consider those who don't want kids "bad" people.

I know how hard it is to raise kids, I actually wish fewer people would have them.

I understand what you are saying, you are only misinterpreting what you think all "breeders" think, and what you think we are thinking is not accurate. I DON'T think people who don't want kids should have them.... ever!

I understand your point completely. I have empathy for your situation and your choice. Do you have empathy for mine?
06/25/2012
Contributor: digit88 digit88
Quote:
Originally posted by sweetpea12
Do you think that it's important to have kids? I really have never been interested in children in any way, whatsoever. And people keep pressuring me and getting freaked out that I have this opinion. I just really never want kids, and I never want ... more
nope
06/25/2012
Contributor: lecanis lecanis
I think it really depends on the individual. There are overpopulation problems throughout the world, and plenty of children waiting to be adopted. There will also always be people who either choose to have children or accidentally become pregnant and choose to keep the child. So the whole 'procreation is necessary to continue the human race' thing falls a little flat in terms of making decisions for your own life.

Do kids make you happier? That really depends on what you want to do with your life. If you're not sure whether kids are for you, try spending a lot of time with the kids of friends and relatives, and see how you feel about it when you're knee deep in their messes, frantic trying to sort out what it is they want or need, and desperate for a nap.

Of course, how you feel about children can be something that changes over the course of your life, too. I happen to be one of those people who didn't particularly want to have children but chose to keep a child when my birth control failed. I don't regret my personal decision - despite the fact that my child is disabled - but it's definitely not for everyone.
06/27/2012
Contributor: Allison.Wilder Allison.Wilder
I'm a woman who NEVER wanted kids. The idea of it freaked me out and I went way out of my way to never have even a scare.

I'm also a mom, by accident. The condom broke, my birth control failed and Plan B didn't stop it either.

I would change it if I could.

All that said, I love my son and he does make me happy. I enjoy watching him learn and grow (he's not yet two).

I do say though that you do not need kids to make you a happy person, my son has made my life harder, actually. He's worth it though.
06/27/2012
Contributor: PropertyOfPotter PropertyOfPotter
My life wouldn't be as happy if I didn't have my children. That being said, I don't think everyone needs to have children in order to be happy..but some people do, I was one of them.
06/27/2012
Contributor: hotcherry hotcherry
I have kids they make me happy. But I also believe some people are happy with or without kids
06/27/2012
Contributor: xOhxSoxScandalousx xOhxSoxScandalousx
I don't think they are necessary, but they are a big plus
06/27/2012