I Feel Like My Life Is OVER

Contributor: JessCee JessCee
Okay, so I would never be able to admit this anywhere else but here on Eden.... I have HPV, I've known for a while and it has not really effected my life at all because I haven't been sexually active... but just recently within the last 3-4 months, warts have popped up and it's just getting worse and worse.

I feel so nasty and dirty and scared now... I've had a good cry just trying to type this out, I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't really know what I'm looking for here either... maybe I just want somebody to tell me it's going to be okay? Is there anything I can do about it?

I'm sorry if this sounds like unorganized babbling... I just get really emotional every time I try to type up this post.
10/13/2011
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Contributor: Ryuson Ryuson
Quote:
Originally posted by JessCee
Okay, so I would never be able to admit this anywhere else but here on Eden.... I have HPV, I've known for a while and it has not really effected my life at all because I haven't been sexually active... but just recently within the last 3-4 ... more
I feel like seeing a doctor is for sure the best route to go. They're completely confidential, and they'll have seen tons of cases like this before and will have a better idea of how to handle it than most people online
Stay safe and stay calm, and to quote Douglas Adams, "Don't panic!"
10/13/2011
Contributor: Kynky Kytty Kynky Kytty
Quote:
Originally posted by JessCee
Okay, so I would never be able to admit this anywhere else but here on Eden.... I have HPV, I've known for a while and it has not really effected my life at all because I haven't been sexually active... but just recently within the last 3-4 ... more
I'm not an expert in HPV, but the first thing that comes to mind right now, is that you should talk to your doctor about your worries concerning the development of your HPV so that you can better deal with the stress you experience right now. He/she may want to set an appointment soon or in a few months to follow up on the situation. From what I just read, most HPV go away by themselves within 2 years - it's still a long time.

I wish you the best, and let us know how it goes. Hugs to you.
10/13/2011
Contributor: Ghost Ghost
I'm so sorry that you're going through this. I went through a similar mental breakdown after a man I slept with told me he might have Herpes (he did not find out until after we had slept together because his previously girlfriend alerted him that she had the disease). I've since been tested multiple times (and I had previously had the HPV shot) and I did not get the disease. But when he told me that, I swear, I felt like throwing in the towel and becoming a monk. It was horrifying. But once my head cleared, I realized that there are thousands of other people who also have HPV and they manage to get through it. Just make sure you take care of it as best you can (and see a doctor regularly) and that you take responsibility not to pass it on to other people.

I wish you so much luck!
10/13/2011
Contributor: wetone123 wetone123
Everything will eventually work itself out with a Drs help. In the meantime we love you and you are never alone here hun. God Bless
10/13/2011
Contributor: indiglo indiglo


I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. The good news is that the warts can be removed! You are certainly not "dirty" because about 50% of the population has (or will have in their lifetime) HPV. Take the time you need to for a good cry, and then make an appointment with your doctor. You can get the warts removed and talk about all the important stuff. Hang in there, life will go on, and yours can still be very good!
10/13/2011
Contributor: Kkay Kkay
Having herpes doesn't make you less of a person.
10/13/2011
Contributor: Peggi Peggi
I'm very sorry to hear about this The bad part about HPV is that you can end up with the warts (as you've described). The good part is, as long as you go in for regular screenings, often that is the worst you'll get. HPV is what is known as the "common cold" of STDs.

You do need to be careful and warn future partners, when it comes to it, which I know can be incredibly hard as I had a friend years ago who went through this, but learning more about HPV yourself and then being able to explain to them that it's not the worst thing in the world to have, will make it easier (hopefully).

I would recommend regular screenings so that they may check to make sure you don't show any abnormal cells. Cervical cancer and others similar is one of the GREATEST risks of having HPV, but if you are monitored, and they watch the cells closely you CAN be treated BEFORE it turns into cancer. But you NEED to get checked in order to do that.

It can be scary hearing you have something like that when it isn't talked about often, but you can get help! And there are tons of support groups, and I'm sure I can speak for just about anyone on here, if you ever need advice or someone to talk to, we are also here for you!

As for the warts, sometimes they go away on their own but I would still get checked in general for cells. And, perhaps they can help you with that issue as well!

Just remember...you may not be able to get rid of the HPV, but all of the bad things that can happen because of it CAN be treated
10/13/2011
Contributor: Antipova Antipova
Oh JessC! I feel for you, Lady.

Luckily Peggi says it well---you can have the warts removed with an appointment to the doctor, and as long as you're screened a few times a year for abnormal cell growth, you'll be able to have it removed before it turns into cancer.

Go see your doctor, dear, and let us know how it comes out (if you feel like talking). All the best!
10/13/2011
Contributor: Ms. Spice Ms. Spice
Quote:
Originally posted by Kkay
Having herpes doesn't make you less of a person.
thank you so much. seriously
10/13/2011
Contributor: Ms. Spice Ms. Spice
Quote:
Originally posted by Ghost
I'm so sorry that you're going through this. I went through a similar mental breakdown after a man I slept with told me he might have Herpes (he did not find out until after we had slept together because his previously girlfriend alerted him ... more
i'm kind of confused by your post... herpes and HPV aren't quite the same thing. Even if you get the HPV shot, you are still able to get some forms of HPV and it doesn't protect you against herpes at all. herpes and HPV are not at all related, and if you get one, you're not going to get the other just because you already carry one virus.
10/13/2011
Contributor: JessCee JessCee
I want to thank everyone for your words of encouragement. After I woke up this morning, I signed on and read all of your responses plus some that were in my inbox. I immediately called the clinic and went straight there. They gave me some cream and I got a pap done.

I am so glad I got up the courage to post this and I cannot thank you guys enough. I finally feel relief and it feels great!
10/13/2011
Contributor: Kkay Kkay
It's good to hear that you got the medical attention that you needed And that you're feeling better about it.
10/13/2011
Contributor: Rarity Rarity
I'm really sorry that you have to go through this. These ladies have the right idea here- you're still as lovely as ever. Keep your chin up!
10/13/2011
Contributor: LQ LQ
Quote:
Originally posted by JessCee
Okay, so I would never be able to admit this anywhere else but here on Eden.... I have HPV, I've known for a while and it has not really effected my life at all because I haven't been sexually active... but just recently within the last 3-4 ... more
So sorry to hear you're having to deal with this, but you're definitely not alone. HPV is super-common. I'm not sure if I "officially" have it or not, but I've had abnormal paps that had to be watched for a while. It's made me very aware of it. With HPV being a STD you can get even if you're religious about using condoms, it can be pretty scary & it's hard to know how to handle it. (I know when I've brought it up with partners they've never made a big deal about it, if that helps.)

So, you've got no reason to feel dirty about it, though I understand the feeling. It's normal. I hope you're able to see a good doctor who will help you feel better about it. I find information always helps me when I'm panicked & helps me feel more in control with a plan of attack.

I know developing warts has got to be especially scary & having them treated is no fun. But, it's possible to have them removed & they may never show up again. I believe it's more common for warts rather than asymptomatic HPV to occur when you're stressed or your immune system is not doing well. So be sure to take care of yourself, emotionally & physically. You're doing a smart thing by coming here for support.

*hugs* And hope everything works out as smoothly as possible.
10/13/2011
Contributor: Kynky Kytty Kynky Kytty
Quote:
Originally posted by JessCee
I want to thank everyone for your words of encouragement. After I woke up this morning, I signed on and read all of your responses plus some that were in my inbox. I immediately called the clinic and went straight there. They gave me some cream and I ... more
Way to go!
10/13/2011
Contributor: SMichelle SMichelle
Quote:
Originally posted by JessCee
I want to thank everyone for your words of encouragement. After I woke up this morning, I signed on and read all of your responses plus some that were in my inbox. I immediately called the clinic and went straight there. They gave me some cream and I ... more
Awesome!
10/13/2011
Contributor: Hot 'N Sexy TexasMama Hot 'N Sexy TexasMama
First of all - there are enough people in the world who will judge and condemn anyone for something like this. Don't beat yourself up over it because there is so much more to your life than this.

I found a website that might help you (for when the doctor isn't handy if you have more questions develop, etc).

link

I will be adding you to my prayer list - as much for physical help as for peace of mind.

I don't know you - but I don't think you're a horrible person. I think sometimes life is made up of the things that happen TO us and it sounds like that is what happened.

I am glad that you called the clinic.

10/13/2011
Contributor: Tuesday Tuesday
Quote:
Originally posted by JessCee
I want to thank everyone for your words of encouragement. After I woke up this morning, I signed on and read all of your responses plus some that were in my inbox. I immediately called the clinic and went straight there. They gave me some cream and I ... more
They gave you a cream? I had it many moons ago. My dermatologist used liquid nitrogen to freeze them off. End of problem. They never came back. Your life is absolutely not over.
10/13/2011
Contributor: JessCee JessCee
Quote:
Originally posted by Hot 'N Sexy TexasMama
First of all - there are enough people in the world who will judge and condemn anyone for something like this. Don't beat yourself up over it because there is so much more to your life than this.

I found a website that might help you ... more
Thank you very much, for both the helpful link, your kind words, and the prayers... they are all greatly appreciated. I am very glad I called the clinic too, it was time to stop being embarrassed and just suck it up, you know?
10/13/2011
Contributor: JessCee JessCee
Quote:
Originally posted by Tuesday
They gave you a cream? I had it many moons ago. My dermatologist used liquid nitrogen to freeze them off. End of problem. They never came back. Your life is absolutely not over.
Yea, it's a cream... and it BURNS! but I'm okay knowing that it's going to help me. I hope I am as lucky as you and it will be the end of this.
10/13/2011
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by JessCee
I want to thank everyone for your words of encouragement. After I woke up this morning, I signed on and read all of your responses plus some that were in my inbox. I immediately called the clinic and went straight there. They gave me some cream and I ... more
I'm sorry to hear you're dealing with this, but I'm very glad that you're on the path to treatment!
10/13/2011
Contributor: Tuesday Tuesday
Quote:
Originally posted by JessCee
Yea, it's a cream... and it BURNS! but I'm okay knowing that it's going to help me. I hope I am as lucky as you and it will be the end of this.
Liquid nitrogen burned like a mf too. Its worth it though.
10/13/2011
Contributor: LavenderSkies LavenderSkies
Quote:
Originally posted by Peggi
I'm very sorry to hear about this The bad part about HPV is that you can end up with the warts (as you've described). The good part is, as long as you go in for regular screenings, often that is the worst you'll get. HPV is what is ... more
Well said!
10/17/2011