Sexual Surrogate

Contributor: Jobthingy Jobthingy
The other night I was watching a show on TLC (what? I told you guys before I am a closet junkie) that talked about the use of a Sexual Surrogate. Essentially, this woman (in this case) came into a couples home and helped them with their intimacy problems. This was a devout Mormon couple that had a hard time getting passed the fact that sex is not just for procreation like their religion states. The female was also assaulted at a young age and found it difficult to get beyond that fear.



She taught them about breathing, relaxing, touch, massage, and how it is all ok.



She sits on the bed with them and guides them - "try this" as she demonstrated nibbling and tickling the husbands back with her long hair.



From reading around the net, they can be used in many situations. Help with sex and intimacy that is strained by physical or mental problems.



So, my question to you all is, have you ever heard of such a thing? Have you considered using a sexual surrogate? Would you feel awkward with a stranger sitting on your bed and showing you how to better your sex life?
04/14/2011
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Contributor: Kindred Kindred
I saw the same episode (scary!).

I have heard of sexual surrogates before, but have never considered using one. However, if I had issues that a surrogate could help with, I would definitely consider it. She acted almost as a sexual therapist, helping each partner to overcome certain fears and inhibitions, teaching them that what they were feeling and experiencing was alright. I think that in our sexually repressed society, feelings of guilt are probably not that uncommon. For the man it was even more so given his Mormon upbringing.
04/14/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Yeah, I've heard of it, and having a degree in Psychology, and having worked in health care, I have little respect for them. I wouldn't use one in a million years.

Any problem we'd be having in the bedroom could be treated with regular therapy with a licensed psychologist. Most real therapists would lose their license if they make any sexual advances on a client and I think the chance of clients being abused further or taken advantage of is pretty high.

Although I have nothing against upright, honest sex workers. However, imo, "sexual surrogates" are high paid prostitutes who took a few psychology classes at the local community college.
04/14/2011
Contributor: Jobthingy Jobthingy
@Kindred *high 5s* Closet TLC junkies unite!



it just all seems so odd to me. I mean, great. they both overcame A LOT. that i think is awesome.



But then I saw her showing the wife how to nibble on her husbands thighs and stuff and I was like "WTF". At what point is a line crossed from "professional" to not so much.
04/14/2011
Contributor: liilii080 liilii080
I've heard of it (closet TLC lover here) and they are used often in a strange twist on behavioral and other types of therapy. I think it makes some sense but it would weird me out to have another person all up in my junk like that. It has the eau de quack about it but different strokes, right?
04/14/2011
Contributor: Kindred Kindred
Quote:
Originally posted by Jobthingy
@Kindred *high 5s* Closet TLC junkies unite!







it just all seems so odd to me. I mean, great. they both overcame A LOT. that i think is awesome.







But then I saw her showing the wife how to ... more
Did you watch the episode about the overweight guy that developed gangrene on his scrotum? Gave me the shivers...

And I must have missed her touching the husband. All I saw was the part with her hair. I thought she was basically a cheerleader/instructor .
04/14/2011
Contributor: Redboxbaby Redboxbaby
Quote:
Originally posted by Kindred
Did you watch the episode about the overweight guy that developed gangrene on his scrotum? Gave me the shivers...



And I must have missed her touching the husband. All I saw was the part with her hair. I thought she was basically a ... more
Gangrene on his scrotum??????? How the hell does that happen?
04/14/2011
Contributor: Kindred Kindred
Quote:
Originally posted by Redboxbaby
Gangrene on his scrotum??????? How the hell does that happen?
He was extremely overweight. The condition is known as Fournier's necrosis.
04/14/2011
Contributor: *HisMrs* *HisMrs*
I have never heard of it but to each their own.
04/14/2011
Contributor: Jobthingy Jobthingy
Quote:
Originally posted by Kindred
Did you watch the episode about the overweight guy that developed gangrene on his scrotum? Gave me the shivers...



And I must have missed her touching the husband. All I saw was the part with her hair. I thought she was basically a ... more
I wanted to but it was past midnight and I knew that if I watched it i would not be a very happy camper in the morning for work. I might try and watch it online

Touching, rubbing his hair, it was so bizarre.
04/14/2011
Contributor: Jobthingy Jobthingy
Quote:
Originally posted by liilii080
I've heard of it (closet TLC lover here) and they are used often in a strange twist on behavioral and other types of therapy. I think it makes some sense but it would weird me out to have another person all up in my junk like that. It has the ... more
eau de quack LOL

totally, I mean if it works for them.. great! But i would find it very weird to have a "professional" in our bed.
04/14/2011
Contributor: Midway through Midway through
I don't think I would have issues in which I would require one, so I'd go with no, I wouldn't use one.
04/14/2011
Contributor: BadassFatass BadassFatass
I wouldn't use one. I'm simply too private for that and would prefer a less hands-on approach to problem solving.
04/15/2011
Contributor: ID42 ID42
I have heard of sexual surrogacy before, but have never considered using a surrogate because we just don't need that sort of hands on approach to anything in our sex life. To each their own though. I can't say that if we thought we needed help with something, we wouldn't consider or at least talk about it. I think just taking that step in and of itself, bringing in a surrogate, would be freeing and a big step to overcoming whatever might be keeping someone from experiencing what they need or want. If done with the right care and respect for the couple, I see nothing wrong with it and see how it could be beneficial.
04/15/2011
Contributor: Jobthingy Jobthingy
Quote:
Originally posted by BadassFatass
I wouldn't use one. I'm simply too private for that and would prefer a less hands-on approach to problem solving.
Funny is, I am not. We swing. Having people in our bed is part of us. But I still think it would weird me out.
04/15/2011
Contributor: Liz2 Liz2
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
Yeah, I've heard of it, and having a degree in Psychology, and having worked in health care, I have little respect for them. I wouldn't use one in a million years.



Any problem we'd be having in the bedroom could be treated ... more
I totally agree!!
04/15/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
I watched the same episode and I have to agree with P'Gell. I was pretty uncomfortable with her methods and doubly-so when it came to her touching either member of the couple. And her rates? Outrageous!
04/15/2011
Contributor: CPTInsanity CPTInsanity
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
Yeah, I've heard of it, and having a degree in Psychology, and having worked in health care, I have little respect for them. I wouldn't use one in a million years.



Any problem we'd be having in the bedroom could be treated ... more
I agree with everything that you have said. I'm no psychologist,or even someone with a psychology degree, but from what I have learned about them they are pretty much prostitutes for the sexually misfunctioning people of the world. There are a tone of stories about a sexaul serrogant on this website. Read some and judge for yourself.

And just like you I could care less about people in the sex industry. Who am I to tell people that they can't sell themselves.
04/15/2011
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by Redboxbaby
Gangrene on his scrotum??????? How the hell does that happen?
Oh Thank God I don't watch this show! That would've freaked me out.
04/15/2011
Contributor: link82 link82
That's crazy!
05/07/2011
Contributor: Joie de Cherresse Joie de Cherresse
I wouldn't use one because I don't need one, lol. But I would consider being a surrogate! I love to teach, especially about sex because it's my specialty!
05/08/2011
Contributor: emiliaa emiliaa
I don't think I would do that for LEARNING purposes... But it sounds extremely hot.
06/09/2011
Contributor: Snozzberries Snozzberries
I saw that one. I think I would rather pay a prostitute than have someone dictate what my partner and I should
do in bed. I would worry we would blame the surrogate if anything went wrong in the future and just give up.
12/19/2011
Contributor: AndroAngel AndroAngel
I've heard of them. I have no strong opinions on them, but I can't help but feel like it might work if they had a more "watch" less "touch" approach to it.
12/19/2011
Contributor: Cherry21 Cherry21
Quote:
Originally posted by Jobthingy
The other night I was watching a show on TLC (what? I told you guys before I am a closet junkie) that talked about the use of a Sexual Surrogate. Essentially, this woman (in this case) came into a couples home and helped them with their intimacy ... more
I saw this. I think it could work for a lot of people. others, not so much.
12/28/2011
Contributor: Sangsara Sangsara
I'd love to be one!
05/30/2012
Contributor: glasskitten glasskitten
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
Yeah, I've heard of it, and having a degree in Psychology, and having worked in health care, I have little respect for them. I wouldn't use one in a million years.



Any problem we'd be having in the bedroom could be treated ... more
This. I couldn't have said it better myself.
09/06/2012
Contributor: Pixy Dust Pixy Dust
Don't think I would want someone telling me how to make our sex life better, but then never been shy to try new things on our own to need someone to come giive instructions!
04/18/2013