The New Intimacy

Who Gets The Toys After A Breakup?

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Contributor: HippieFeet HippieFeet
A male friend of mine came to me with a question.. and I don't have the experience to answer it, so I thought I would ask here:

He and his girlfriend at the time were living together, and he had bought several toys for them to use. When they broke up, she moved out. The toys got left behind. What should he do with them? Should he try to give them to her to use with her future boyfriends? Throw them away? He doesn't think he should keep them because he doesn't know how a female would feel if he pulled them out later. ("Ew, where has that been?") Would it be a mood killer for some? They have been washed and sterilized, obviously.

Female opinions would be nice! Thank you
06/26/2012
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Contributor: HippieFeet HippieFeet
Quote:
Originally posted by HippieFeet
A male friend of mine came to me with a question.. and I don't have the experience to answer it, so I thought I would ask here:

He and his girlfriend at the time were living together, and he had bought several toys for them to use. When ... more
Anyone? Please?
06/26/2012
Contributor: ghent529 ghent529
The trash can. If it was something we used together... but if it's just your then keep it
06/26/2012
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
Keep the ones he bought and can use on himself. If they're made of a porous material, he should use them anally, wash them off with just water, and give them back to her.
06/26/2012
Contributor: RomanticGoth RomanticGoth
Take them over to her place when her new boyfriend is home in a nice clear trash bag?
06/26/2012
Contributor: sexyfun sexyfun
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
Keep the ones he bought and can use on himself. If they're made of a porous material, he should use them anally, wash them off with just water, and give them back to her.
If they're made of a porous material then he should use them anally, wash them off and give them back to her??
Everything I heard about porous toys says you should not use them anally and just wash them. Did you forget a 'not' or a 'non' somewhere, or am I not understanding you correctly?
06/26/2012
Contributor: HippieFeet HippieFeet
I think it was sarcasm? Either way I will pass on the link to him so he can read, lol. Thanks
06/26/2012
Contributor: agilbert agilbert
i think they should be thrown in trash because when i break up with someone and leave i wouldnt want anything that would link us or remind me of him. and other i wouldnt want him to keep them because then he would use them on the next girl and those were really bought for us
06/27/2012
Contributor: Calla Calla
I haven't broken up with anyone since I've had toys, but if I did I would keep them since they all belong to me. I wouldn't throw them away, because that would be a waste of thousands of dollars and perfectly good toys.

Your friend should throw them out. If I was seeing a new guy and he brought out toys that had belonged to his ex I would be turned off/grossed out.
06/27/2012
Contributor: Petite Valentine Petite Valentine
Quote:
Originally posted by sexyfun
If they're made of a porous material then he should use them anally, wash them off and give them back to her??
Everything I heard about porous toys says you should not use them anally and just wash them. Did you forget a 'not' or a ... more
He forgot this:

Even if the toys can be completely sterilized, if they remind him of her, he should get rid of them. If they're of the expensive variety, he can sell them here on EF classifieds instead of throwing them out.
06/27/2012
Contributor: Ms. N Ms. N
Quote:
Originally posted by Petite Valentine
He forgot this:

Even if the toys can be completely sterilized, if they remind him of her, he should get rid of them. If they're of the expensive variety, he can sell them here on EF classifieds instead of throwing them out.
This! If it bothers him to keep them, and they are of the sort that can be resold, why not make a few bucks off of them?
06/27/2012
Contributor: PropertyOfPotter PropertyOfPotter
When my ex husband and I broke up, I kept the ones that were intended for me, and he kept the ones intended for him. If it was a mutual toy, like a cock ring...I have it to him 'cause I didn't need it anyway. Eventually, I threw all the toys I kept away (they were cheap anyway), and started over with my husband with out own!
06/27/2012
Contributor: Illusional Illusional
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
Keep the ones he bought and can use on himself. If they're made of a porous material, he should use them anally, wash them off with just water, and give them back to her.
*gigglesnort* That's terrible!
06/27/2012
Contributor: Beck Beck
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
Keep the ones he bought and can use on himself. If they're made of a porous material, he should use them anally, wash them off with just water, and give them back to her.
You crack me up!

If she didn't take them then he should get a hold of her and make sure she doesn't want them. If he doesn't want them the non porous materials he should try to sell and the porous materials he should throw away. If he wants to keep them, then that's cool too. Though, I don't think I would use a toy from a male partner who just pulled out a random toy. I would if it was glass or steel and he had bleach though.
06/27/2012
Contributor: js250 js250
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
Keep the ones he bought and can use on himself. If they're made of a porous material, he should use them anally, wash them off with just water, and give them back to her.
Shame on you--laughing--that is sooo bad!!

I think he should keep the ones for him, ask her if she wants hers and if not, sell them or toss them.
06/27/2012
Contributor: Lavendar Lavendar
I would ask is she wanted them, if not then toss them. As a woman, I would find it a mood killer if my partner pulled out a toy used with someone else. It's part of the past and he should get rid of the ones they used together.He should just keep ones he purchased for himself.
06/27/2012
Contributor: Ashley B Ashley B
I would ask who wants to keep what. If it's something they used together, I'd toss them.
06/27/2012
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
(EF Review Program Mentor)
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
Keep the ones he bought and can use on himself. If they're made of a porous material, he should use them anally, wash them off with just water, and give them back to her.
I knew I liked you JR! I was thinking the same thing.

I would say he should use the ones he wants to and give any that are of no use to him back to her. Who cares who she uses them with?
06/27/2012
Contributor: Stinkytofu10 Stinkytofu10
Quote:
Originally posted by HippieFeet
A male friend of mine came to me with a question.. and I don't have the experience to answer it, so I thought I would ask here:

He and his girlfriend at the time were living together, and he had bought several toys for them to use. When ... more
I should, of course.
06/27/2012
Contributor: xilliannax xilliannax
Quote:
Originally posted by sexyfun
If they're made of a porous material then he should use them anally, wash them off and give them back to her??
Everything I heard about porous toys says you should not use them anally and just wash them. Did you forget a 'not' or a ... more
I think JR was making a joke. IE "give her an infection! It'll be funny!"
06/27/2012
Contributor: HippieFeet HippieFeet
I had no idea about selling them. I passed that along! Thanks again everybody.
06/27/2012
Contributor: agilbert agilbert
i agree
06/28/2012
Contributor: KrissyNovacaine KrissyNovacaine
I agree that keeping them would be a turn off for the next partner (this happened to me... A guy pulled out a vibe to use on me and I drew a line at it touching me).

I would sell them if they were sterilizable or trash them... or super glue them to the porch of her new place.
06/30/2012