Hey there - my roommate and I are looking into a strap-on to share. We have slightly different body types, so it'd have to fit us both, and neither of us has EVER DONE THIS BEFORE. What are some recommendations you guys have? Are some strap-ons only fun for the person catching, or do they all feel good for both people? Basically any information would be super appreciated! less

For a harness:
-You want a strap style harness that adjusts to fit a good range of people. I'd recommend an o-ring style since this gives the most versatility. As for pleasure for both parties, you will definitely want a harness that sits low on you both. In a perfect world, the person wearing the harness will feel the base of the dildo bumping against them, ideally against their clit, but this requires the o-ring to be positioned low enough. This will be a bit tricky because you are different sizes, but it's not impossible.
-If you're willing to spend a bit, the Aslan Jaguar is a good choice. Very high quality and good design, adjustable and usually sits low on most people. The downside is that leather can't be sterilized so keep that in mind when sharing if you aren't fluid bonded.
-The SpareParts Joque is also moderately adjustable, research sizes before purchasing to make sure it will fit you both. I believe this is washable which makes it a bit safer for sharing.
-The Bend Over Beginner kit or the Bend Over Intermediate kit both have cheap, crappy harnesses that are functional but not ideal. This will be slightly cheaper on your pocket book but less enjoyable for the wearer due to less than prime position, and I find that the angle isn't really great which can make thrusting awkward. The bullet vibe pocket isn't in the greatest position in these and the dildos are good quality but designed more for anal use than vaginal, though they're not, by any means, unusable for vaginal. These harnesses are also machine washable for sharing.
-Personally, my partner and I prefer to have our own harnesses, but I understand this might be financially impossible in the initial investment. We LOVE our RodeoH's but these aren't adjustable so aren't usually shareable, but sharing harnesses feels like sharing underwear to me so I prefer to have my own anyway. They are, however, supremely comfortable, washable, work great with a clit vibe worn against the wearer, and have a great dildo position. My partner has the brief style and I have the Girly girl panty style.
You will need a flared base dildo. Since you're planning to share, I'd go with pure silicone for hygiene.
-HERE is a search of Eden for O-ring compatible, silicone dildos.
Tantus and Vixen both make great options. Sportsheets makes a couple decent ones too.
-A wider, thicker base, like on the Tantus O2 line (including Mark, Adam, Revolution, Cush, Max, Luke, Flurry, and Mikey) is going to be the most stable.
-Keep in mind that longer dildos are easier to thrust with. Curved is good for g-spotting but can make certain positions less comfortable.
-Some dildos, like the Tantus Goddess accomodate a bullet vibe in the base which can add stimulation for both partners.
-A bullet or other small vibe can also be tucked inside the harness, against the wearer's clit. This will obviously stimulate the wearer, but should also transmit down the dildo to the other person as well, depending on positioning. Some harnesses accomodate this better than others.
-A We-Vibe or a Lelo Tiani can also be worn, technically by either partner, but it can make a great alternative to a bullet or clit vibe for the wearer since it's more likely to stay in place due to the internal arm.
-The other option is something like the Fun Factory Share, Tantus Feeldoe, or Nexus Jr. or Sr.. These can be used with or without a harness, though most people, myself included, conclude that it works better with. They are an excellent way, dependent on the anatomy of the partners, for both partners to enjoy the sensations involved.
As I mentioned above, our favorite harnesses are our respective RodeoH's, and we've both used a wide variety of harnesses in our lifetime. Our favorite dildo for harness play is our Tantus 02 Mark. The length is great, the curve is minimal but present, the material is fantastic, the duel density is wonderful, the base is wide and thick which gives great stability in the harness, and it's semi-realistic without being offensive to our lesbian sensibilities. My Tantus Acute comes in as a close second favorite dildo for harness play. The curve is more pronounced which makes positions like doggy-style less comfortable, and it's a little short which can sometimes be a challenge, especially with different sized partners, but it's a great dildo and works well in a harness anyway.
For me, when I'm the wearer, strap on sex is less about the physical sensations I feel and more about the visual, auditory, mental, emotional turn on and the closeness with my partner and giving her pleasure, but that's just me. I know girls who can come just from the base of the dildo pressing against them. That's not me, though I can with a vibe inside my harness. But having an orgasm isn't what I'm there for. I can have a fabulous time fucking a partner with a strap on without getting any physical stimulation from it at all. And I'm usually so intensely turned on that even more fun is had after the harness comes off which leaves me perfectly happy and sated.
If you have any questions, I'd be happy to answer, either here or if you inbox me.
Good luck and have fun. Strap-on sex is one of my favorite activities! less

Wow thank you so much. Your reply was most informative with vast degrees of information. I think I will have to take your advice on the Jaguar, as I will not be sharing mine. Is there a strap on that allows you to interchange the shafts you use or perhaps interchanging covers? less