Definitely pick up a better lube. I'd vote for Maximus and System Jo H2O flavored. Those are both water based and safe with all toys. A good silicone lube for water play would be good too, I'd suggest Pink or Eros.
The Hitachi is a must. It works great for back and muscle massage as well as awesome clitoral stimulation. There are some really great attachments for it also, so you could pop an attachment on and have a super strong G-spot and clitoral vibe. The G-pod and Tri-pod both sound awesome, sadly I haven't gotten to try them yet, but I believe there are some pretty good reviews for them.
A staple for me is a good bullet or egg style vibe. They are little and strong, can be used for foreplay, are small enough to not interfere too much during sex, and they are great for solo play as well. I loved my Golden Nugget until it died on me, and I have also been enjoying my Xtreme Pack g-spot vibe and Daisy vibe. They are all really good choices.
A cock ring is good too. The stretchy ones will usually fit a good variety of sizes and some include a vibrating bullet for the clit. I have the Tickling Tongue ring and both my husband and I love it. It is actually long enough to reach the clit and it is stretchy enough to be comfortable for him and add more pleasure for both of us.
Jimbo Jones gave some great suggestions on Dildos. I would suggest sticking to silicone because of them being so hygienic and easy to care for. I have a plain looking Perk and the Lone Star which is more girthy but is made from VixSkin (same as the Raquel). I'd suggest you look at lentgh and girth and pick something that looks good to you. Some people love ridges, some people hate 'em.
Those are my recommendations. Water based lube for out of water play, silicone based lube for tub/shower/pool play, the Hitachi, a bullet vibe, cock ring, and a good dildo. A Rabbit style vibe would be a good addition too. I hope you and your husband end up loving whatever you decide to go with!