Lots of warm up as well. Lube and warm up are your two most important things here, so start with smaller toys and work your way larger, and of course keep with the lube. Something else to keep in mind is that you may never be able to comfortably take it, and that is perfectly fine too. We all have our limits

And it's always good to start with finger-play along with lots of lube first, so your anal opening can be gently stretched with a softer foreign object, before insertion with a real plug .

Lots of good advice here.

I would suggest starting out with some quality solo time. Doing things yourself will help a bunch. You have to learn how to relax first and foremost, having a partner there will not make it any easier.

I find a nice warm bath helps to relax not only me but the anus as well. If you have a toy that is compatible with silicone lube you could even play in the tub. Another big help is a vibe, this could be used around the outside if you do not have one that can be sterilized.

Go slow, use plenty of lube and above all else, if it hurts, stop, add more lube, use a smaller toy or your fingers. It will take time but it will be much better for both of you in the end. (oh yes I did )

I agree, go slow....if it hurts, try something smaller and work your way into it...

If it's always hurt then you might be tensing up "defensively" when the toy comes out. Start out with one of your fingers and just start by exploring the outside. Enjoy the feelings, then try a little penetration to teach yourself how to relax and enjoy those sensations (and also that you can relax your anus safely without bad, smelly or embarrassing things happening). Once you learn how to relax move on to a toy. Go slow.

It also helps if you warm the toy up in warm water before use.

it might not work for everyone try a smaller one

never push yourself

I wish you luck, but I could never get into back-door play lol

With something that size I'd want a LOT of warming up and lots and lots of foreplay. Even then it might still be too much!

go slow. lots of foreplay - fingers, smaller objects. you definitely have to work your way up to that. good luck!

A lot of good advice of course. Relax, maybe have a drink or two But some more experience based.

The main point is the material. Rigid plugs and toys hurt as they don't give in to your bodies anatomy and spincter muscle pressure. I find UR3, Vixskin are the best for the rear end (in all the year of using skin like materials I never had any issues with their material savety).

I personally find the Triple Riple toy good as well as the Blush Buldge Cock is great but some find it not firm enough. And of course the Gapers Organic is THE "painless training toy"

Enjoy!