The New Intimacy

Partner participation in reviews. Do you ever feel guilty?

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Contributor: VanillaFreeSex VanillaFreeSex
Sometimes I feel like I am giving my partner the third degree afterwords to get his feedback. I also feel sometimes with certain products that I am pushy about trying them out ASAP.

I feel guilty like I could be taking some of the spontaniety out of our sex life. Yet at the same time, this has been a great opportunity for us to explore new horizons, test our boundaries, and stock our toybox like we wouldn't be able to otherwise.
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
yes i feel guilty
4  (4%)
nope, no guilt
76  (73%)
depends on the circumstances (please explain)
11  (11%)
why? he loves it!
13  (12%)
Total votes: 104
Poll is closed
02/14/2011
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Contributor: PussyGalore PussyGalore
I only feel guilty because the toys for men SUCK. Seriously, they suck. He's not interested in sitting around with plugs up his bum or cock harnesses that pinch testicles.


I would LOOOVE to see something that could be placed on the penis that creates a gentle, constant stimulation that doesn't actually get him off. We've resorted to dressing him up and other things to add a taboo aspect to his side of the game.
02/14/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
I have never felt guilty, I always wait till the next day to ask her about the experience. I have felt some frustration though, like when I get a new toy for us to try out and we have to wait for some reason.
02/14/2011
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
There have been times that I've been asking him for his feedback during use, and shortly thereafter. But I always make sure he knows I'm planning on doing something like that before we start. For the most part, I'll wait until the next day and I try not to get pushy with him, although he's been pretty enthusiastic about everything we've tried so far, so I haven't ever had to push very hard.
02/14/2011
Contributor: Sammi Sammi
I don't feel guilty. He knows what's in all the packages, and will often ask what's new to try before we start. He's pretty good about giving his opinion one of the times we use something before I write the review.
02/14/2011
Contributor: sweet seduction sweet seduction
no guilt in the least
02/14/2011
Contributor: Miss Jenn Miss Jenn
Quote:
Originally posted by VanillaFreeSex
Sometimes I feel like I am giving my partner the third degree afterwords to get his feedback. I also feel sometimes with certain products that I am pushy about trying them out ASAP.

I feel guilty like I could be taking some of the spontaniety ... more
My husband absolutely loves that I am reviewing sex toys. he does not mind me asking his input after something, and actually - now that I am doing this, he goes so far to ask me when am I planning on reviewing it so he can tell me his input.
02/14/2011
Contributor: CSEA CSEA
Quote:
Originally posted by VanillaFreeSex
Sometimes I feel like I am giving my partner the third degree afterwords to get his feedback. I also feel sometimes with certain products that I am pushy about trying them out ASAP.

I feel guilty like I could be taking some of the spontaniety ... more
Yeah sometimes I'm like determined to try it right away and many times and then find out how it is. And others hes happy to experiment and play
02/14/2011
Contributor: markeagleone markeagleone
Quote:
Originally posted by VanillaFreeSex
Sometimes I feel like I am giving my partner the third degree afterwords to get his feedback. I also feel sometimes with certain products that I am pushy about trying them out ASAP.

I feel guilty like I could be taking some of the spontaniety ... more
My wife and I both are members here at Eden. We both try to puut our words into the reviews to give everyone else the best advise on the products. It is a beautiful way for us to explore each others thoughts and feelings even though we disagree at times. Maybe trying to let your partner share the review even if your partner doesn't want to be a member. It would benefit the community and you might find that it will benefit your relationship as it has mine!
02/14/2011
Contributor: VanillaFreeSex VanillaFreeSex
yah, i'll admit sometimes i ask during, but that is also for personal sexual reasons of needing feedback on something we are doing for the first time.
he is supportive and enthusiastic about me being on EF. (even supportive of my new blog) Every time we do try something out, I do want to have sex, and I do want to try it from a sexual standpoint. the review is just the bonus.

so i change my vote....no guilt
02/15/2011
Contributor: VanillaFreeSex VanillaFreeSex
oh and i told him i want him to pick out some stuff to order. and maybe some pocket pussy or something that i can watch him play
02/15/2011
Contributor: Eliza Eliza
I definitely feel like I get pushy with my girlfriend sometimes to use toys with me and give feedback for reviews. I know she doesn't mind, but I can't help feeling funny about it sometimes.
02/15/2011
Contributor: TeaganChase TeaganChase
My man loves reviewing and testing them out as much as i do.
02/15/2011
Contributor: Yoda Yoda
My wife doesn't have any interest in reviewing toys. I'm the toy fan in our house.
02/15/2011
Contributor: ❦Angel Of Music❦ ❦Angel Of Music❦
I don't think I'm pushy when is comes to trying toys with my boyfriend, but he has no interest in them whatsoever. He is willing to try them with me for me, but otherwise he could care less.
02/15/2011
Contributor: Liz2 Liz2
No guilt, but I buy toys that I think my b/f will enjoy as well.
When he travels, he usually surprises me with a toy, something that we both will enjoy even though it is primarily for me.
This is from a guy that was initially intimidated by toys!
02/16/2011
Contributor: callsignhusker callsignhusker
no guilt but i dont interrogate them ..
04/02/2011
Contributor: xKrystalx xKrystalx
Quote:
Originally posted by Miss Jenn
My husband absolutely loves that I am reviewing sex toys. he does not mind me asking his input after something, and actually - now that I am doing this, he goes so far to ask me when am I planning on reviewing it so he can tell me his input.
same ^
04/13/2011
Contributor: Elaira Elaira
I ask my boyfriend for feedback on everything and I use things by myself and with him. It's much easier to write a review when you have the other person's point of view. For example, Good Head was horrible for me but he really enjoyed it so I asked him what he liked about it so we could find something better for both of us (and write a comprehensive review).

He also loves that I'm so willing to try and experiment with things because he is as well.
05/23/2011
Contributor: Sex'и'Violence Sex'и'Violence
Not a problem here. He's the one who found the site and seems to be more into it than I am most times.
05/23/2011
Contributor: K101 K101
Not at all. My partner is more than happy to provide feedback and use the toys on me. I don't even have to ask him to use it on me or give me his feedback and personal opinions. He isn't involved with EF or anything like this except for the using them on me part, but he's always very good about helping and plus what could he complain about?! He knows it's always something we use only together. I don't care to use them alone so if he had any kind of complaints about using them on me or giving me his opinion I'd think he was very selfish. I mean if it's going to be used for forplay and then we have sex he's getting a good deal too! lol
06/21/2011
Contributor: Wondermom Wondermom
Quote:
Originally posted by Miss Jenn
My husband absolutely loves that I am reviewing sex toys. he does not mind me asking his input after something, and actually - now that I am doing this, he goes so far to ask me when am I planning on reviewing it so he can tell me his input.
so far this has been my experience as well, also with any new toys that come for review or not lol
06/21/2011
Contributor: Sinfully Sinfully
Never feel guilty. My guy enjoys using toys on me or watching me use them on myself.
07/10/2011
Contributor: Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by VanillaFreeSex
Sometimes I feel like I am giving my partner the third degree afterwords to get his feedback. I also feel sometimes with certain products that I am pushy about trying them out ASAP.

I feel guilty like I could be taking some of the spontaniety ... more
We sit at the computer together doing this. It is FUN and really has been a serious additional SPARK to our love life and "toy testing "sessions too!!! We have always shopped together for "toys" in catalogs, so this is just the newer extension of that. Gives us laughs too. Also no "third degree", we BOTH take turns writing about what we want!!! MAKE THIS FUN.
07/13/2011
Contributor: Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by Sinfully
Never feel guilty. My guy enjoys using toys on me or watching me use them on myself.
Indeed...no complaints from either of us, either! This is a great excuse for us BOTH to "buy new toys to test". How can one lose on that deal???
07/13/2011
Contributor: Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by VanillaFreeSex
oh and i told him i want him to pick out some stuff to order. and maybe some pocket pussy or something that i can watch him play
Exact same thing I did with my hubby...except I play WITH him with those toys too. Great "hand job helper". Plus, a little tongue at the end of those "tube toys" adds a special touch!!! Enjoy!
07/13/2011
Contributor: Latsyrc728 Latsyrc728
I do the review on my own. I will ask him how he likes the product afterwards, but he generally wouldn't say more than "i love it" or 'it's ok" anyhow, I am the articulate one. : )
07/23/2011
Contributor: js250 js250
Quote:
Originally posted by VanillaFreeSex
Sometimes I feel like I am giving my partner the third degree afterwords to get his feedback. I also feel sometimes with certain products that I am pushy about trying them out ASAP.

I feel guilty like I could be taking some of the spontaniety ... more
We were granted a great opportunity to try new toys and if he doesn't feel like commenting on the products, I will order toys pertaining more towards me and then fill in his point of view in the review section later. When he chooses a product, however he is also as excited as I am to try it and explore our options. There have been a couple times when we were in the mood to try other things and used the review toys first, but for the most part we are in it together and both benefitting from the review program.
07/23/2011
Contributor: bayosgirl bayosgirl
I wouldn't hesitate to ask my husband for his feedback.
07/24/2011
Contributor: Ms. Spice Ms. Spice
nope because you're only asking about how it works afterwards. you're still using them, and i'm sure he's enjoying your time together immensely. it's always great to get two points of view on reviews anyway
07/26/2011