The New Intimacy

Would you consider sending your child away for a few weeks to give you the freedom to spice up your sex life with your partner?

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Contributor: Kitt Katt Kitt Katt
My husband and I were discussing what to do with our pre-teen son when school breaks for the summer. His older brother used to take care of him during the summer, but he moved out recently, so we no longer have a "built-in" babysitter. My husband mentioned sending our son to his grandparents for a few weeks (they live a couple of hours away). I got really excited thinking about being able to have sex ANYWHERE in the house without worrying about the kids seeing/hearing us. Also, we would be able to watch dirty movies on the big screen TV, which we have not been able to do for the past several years.

Is it wrong that I am secretly excited about this and looking forward to all the sexcapades we will have in our son's absence?

Please feel free to comment or provide any suggestions.
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Yes, I would do anything to spice up my sex life with my partner
57  (77%)
No, I love my child more than I like sex
8  (11%)
Wait...what??? You can have a sex life when you have a child?
9  (12%)
Total votes: 74
Poll is closed
03/12/2011
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Contributor: nicky51679 nicky51679
We have 4 girls and so time alone is almost never, so I would be very excited if we had the opportunity to spend a few weeks alone together and I don't believe there is anything wrong with you being excited about it, quality time is very important in a relationship, sometimes you just have to take time for youselves.
03/12/2011
Contributor: Solar Ray Solar Ray
Sure... great idea for the kids to spend time with the grandparents. They aren't getting any younger and it's nice for the kids to spend time with an older and wiser generation as well to get some different views on life. Anyway you need time away as well sometimes and this is a good chance to have special alone time with your partner. Absolutely no need to feel guilty. Just have fun.
03/12/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
You bet, go for it. Hell, even just a weekend does wonders for us.

I think that is why summer camps were thought of.
03/12/2011
Contributor: SexyStuff SexyStuff
A pre teen? Definitely. Probably not a toddler or baby though.
03/13/2011
Contributor: LavenderSkies LavenderSkies
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
You bet, go for it. Hell, even just a weekend does wonders for us.

I think that is why summer camps were thought of.
Lol!
03/13/2011
Contributor: ID42 ID42
We did that with our daughter last year. She was at my sister's place out of state for a month. We had sex everywhere! All over the house! We did still have to work around the baby (because like SexyStuff said, prolly not a toddler or baby though), but that's a lot easier than a probing, questioning, intense 6yr old. There is nothing wrong with having some fun and alone time with your spouse. Neither of you are bad or neglectful or even need to feel the slightest guilt for your upcoming fun time. You should be excited! I know I would be if my girl were going to be gone again this summer...
03/13/2011
Contributor: vegan.guy vegan.guy
As long as your kid is okay with it, I don't see anything wrong with it.
03/13/2011
Contributor: Miss Madeline Miss Madeline
I have skipped class to enjoy some time alone with my partner while my kiddos are at daycare. A week, or even a couple of weeks? Yes, please. I'd miss them lots, but I miss intimacy with my partner too.
03/13/2011
Contributor: pookalicious pookalicious
Quote:
Originally posted by Kitt Katt
My husband and I were discussing what to do with our pre-teen son when school breaks for the summer. His older brother used to take care of him during the summer, but he moved out recently, so we no longer have a "built-in" babysitter. My ... more
Hey, if your son wants to go or is looking forward to going, jump on that. I guess my only thing is I wouldn't feel right to force him if he wasn't going just to have time for my sex life... but that's also coming from a place where my kids are so attached to me (and much younger) that they would scream and cry the whole time. Haha!
03/15/2011
Contributor: mama2007 mama2007
Quote:
Originally posted by SexyStuff
A pre teen? Definitely. Probably not a toddler or baby though.
agreed! we have two toddlers so no way would we just ask my parents to babysit for longer than a day or night. teenager yeah prolly they could go hangout with them and find alot to do.

would be awesome to have sex anywhere and at anytime but wont be unless its overnight break for now cuz we have 2 and 3 yr old. we wait til they are asleep
03/16/2011
Contributor: minifreak minifreak
I would send them to someone I trust, not to like, a camp or anything like that ... but we do not have anywhere we can send ours
03/16/2011
Contributor: Skitlz Skitlz
Quote:
Originally posted by Kitt Katt
My husband and I were discussing what to do with our pre-teen son when school breaks for the summer. His older brother used to take care of him during the summer, but he moved out recently, so we no longer have a "built-in" babysitter. My ... more
Yes, if the kids are going somewhere they will have fun and not have problems.
03/17/2011
Contributor: Amy Snookum Amy Snookum
Quote:
Originally posted by Kitt Katt
My husband and I were discussing what to do with our pre-teen son when school breaks for the summer. His older brother used to take care of him during the summer, but he moved out recently, so we no longer have a "built-in" babysitter. My ... more
When I growed up I knew what my parents doing in the bedroom, cause mother and father told me information about sex. Also I ve been confused, but a little when I had broke into the room where my parents are having sex, but no big troubles or traumas for me. Sex education is great thing. Also your kid could go to the walk with friends or to some attraction, computer championship.

Anyway, IMHO sex education is the first thing to stop avoiding your and partner's sexual life.
03/25/2011
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
We've managed a very satisfying sex life without exiling our children. I think it's quite healthy for them to understand that adults have sex and privacy is required.
03/25/2011
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
Isn't that what the grandparents are for?
03/25/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Gunsmoke
We've managed a very satisfying sex life without exiling our children. I think it's quite healthy for them to understand that adults have sex and privacy is required.
I TOTALLY AGREE!

I have never "sent" my kids to go with my parents or his. (they've already raised their kids MY kids are MY job.) We did have ONE weekend, where for one night my older girls (then in late teens) watched my youngest one (she was about 8 or 9 then) and my dad and his wife took her the second night. But, aside from that, our kids live with us, they are with us every night, (until they move out) and they understand that sex for parents is part of life.

That's why bedrooms have doors. Ours and theirs.

My kids are mine and I care for them. Full time.

Now, the youngest one has gone to a couple of sleepovers, which is good for her. But, I wouldn't send a small child (under 7 or 8 or so) away over night.

As for "a few weeks." I've never been away from ANY of my kids for "a few weeks" ever. My oldest is an adult and lives on her own and I have not even gone a few weeks now without seeing her. I wouldn't send a child to grandparents for more than a night or two at any rate.

I wouldn't say "I love my children more than I love sex." You can't compare the two. One has nothing to do with the other, in terms of "loving." In fact, NONE of the responses fit my situation. But, the fact is my kids are MY responsibility and I don't flip that responsibility to other people. I decided to have the kids, my parents and my Man's mother have already raised their children. They wouldn't WANT my kids "for a few weeks" nor would I allow it.

Mileage and all that.
03/25/2011
Contributor: liilii080 liilii080
Quote:
Originally posted by vegan.guy
As long as your kid is okay with it, I don't see anything wrong with it.
I second this. If parents and grandparents are ok wit hit, why not?
03/25/2011
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
You bet, go for it. Hell, even just a weekend does wonders for us.

I think that is why summer camps were thought of.
I'm pretty sure this is why my parents sent me to camp as a kid, now that you mention it. No complaints though, I loved it!
03/25/2011
Contributor: hjtee hjtee
Yes, I see nothing wrong with it, especially the grandparents.
It's not like they are strangers, and one day the grandparents will be gone, adn the child will wish they had more time.

As long as it's a set amount of time and doesn't become a permanent move. That's unfair to all people involved.
03/26/2011
Contributor: Pleasure Piratess Pleasure Piratess
My parents will occasionally take my kids overnight and I always look forward to the time with my husband as much as the kids look forward to being spoiled by grandma.
But I don't think I would even consider sending them anywhere for a few weeks, and especially not for the sole purpose of having sex.
03/28/2011
Contributor: Redboxbaby Redboxbaby
Our son goes to summer camp for 2 weeks every year. He gets on a plane and can't wait to get there to be with his friends and catch up. He often goes on school trips for a few days at a time. My husband's job has required us to move a few times in the last few years. Our son is 16 and he misses his old friends terribly. We occasionally send him to visit them. He saves his money to buy his own plane tickets. When he is gone we take total advantage of our alone time! We always say once he is off to college and we are retired, we are going to do just fine.

There is nothing wrong with taking advantage of your alone time, when you can get it. There is nothing wrong with sending your kids off to camp. It builds character and helps them be strong individuals.

We are not sending him away for the sole purpose of getting time alone, but it is a nice benefit.
03/28/2011
Contributor: KrystalFayeO KrystalFayeO
I voted no before I actually read your post, sorry. I think that in your situation it's ok. You need time to work on your marriage and love life and it's not like he's a newborn. Kids like having time with their grandparents to spoil them! I would say go for it!
03/28/2011
Contributor: jankit jankit
Quote:
Originally posted by Gunsmoke
We've managed a very satisfying sex life without exiling our children. I think it's quite healthy for them to understand that adults have sex and privacy is required.
Especially preteens! At the same time though... if it's mutually beneficial, your kid is old enough and responsible enough, and he/she is excited to be away from the parentals for a while, I say GO FOR IT.
04/03/2011
Contributor: Mrs.B Mrs.B
Weeks? No. A weekend? Sure! We have two small children though, so I'm sure that's where the length differs. But we still have a healthy sex life when our children are in bed at night. Sure, it would be great to be able to do it whenever, wherever, but I feel like we traded in that spontaneous love making time when we had our girls almost back to back. I'm sure it will get easier as they get older, but I don't think it has affected our sex one bit! Sometimes the waiting until bedtime is great foreplay!
04/05/2011
Contributor: duff duff
Easy peasy of course! Grandmas...camp...
12/11/2011
Contributor: AHubbyof2SexualMinds AHubbyof2SexualMinds
We have an almost 2-year old. We do have sex when he's around and in bed, or during naptime, but the times my wife really cuts loose and we have those hot encounters are when he's spending the night with grandparents. So as he gets older, I'm sure we will send him off for a week or so, especially since my wife's family lives far away and that would be a good time for him to be with them.
12/28/2011
Contributor: bsgs bsgs
its needed...parents still need time without kids
01/28/2012
Contributor: mandaj mandaj
2 words.... SUMMER CAMP!!!! lol
01/28/2012
Contributor: fredacarl fredacarl
Quote:
Originally posted by Kitt Katt
My husband and I were discussing what to do with our pre-teen son when school breaks for the summer. His older brother used to take care of him during the summer, but he moved out recently, so we no longer have a "built-in" babysitter. My ... more
Yes, I would do anything to spice up my sex life with my partner
02/24/2012