Quote:
Originally posted by
Naughty Student
I was wondering the other night if anyone here on EF has been specifically in a foursome with another couple or as a groupmof singles/dating individuals.
Please include what type of relationship you have (mono/poly) and what the circumstances
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I was wondering the other night if anyone here on EF has been specifically in a foursome with another couple or as a groupmof singles/dating individuals.
Please include what type of relationship you have (mono/poly) and what the circumstances were for the foursome. What do you think is the best type of foursome scenario for a long term mono couple who are curious?
My guy is interested in a threesome. I think that a foursome with another couple, with which we do not physically interact but simply have sex with in the same room, is "safer" and could be easier on the emotional psychological aspect of the situation in the aftermath.
What do you guys think?
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Honey no matter how it may look right now if you need to orchestrate a sex act to feel "safer" then you really shouldn't be looking into adding more to your relationship. There is nothing safe about group sex...ANY addition to your monogamous relationship can potentially cause problems.
Even having sex with another couple in the room presumably doing the same things WILL lead to questions like: Was my guy getting off on watching HER? Would he rather be WITH her? Was my girl cumming so hard because she was thinking about being with HIM? Trust me on this, I've done it and these (or some variation) ARE the things you will think. What saves you is being able to talk to your lover frankly and honestly. You have to know that he won't lie to you and try to ease your jealousy...that's your problem to deal with.
You have a few extra issues: One of you could really hate the experience while the other simply LOVES it, one of you might feel the need to move forward and crave more than exhibitionism/voyeuris m while the other doesn't, both of you might want to do it again but you might both want different things. Having sex with strangers is awkward just like the first time you had sex with your current lover. This can also affect how the experience turns out.
My point is there really isn't a way to make inviting others into your bedroom safe for your relationship. There will be ramifications and trying to minimize them almost always backfires. You need to deal with your insecurities and realize that you love your partner. Regardless of what happens this won't change. Sex with others simply isn't so amazing that you will dream about the other participants and it will ruin your relationship unless there are problems in your relationship already that you are running away from.
It is best when you feel comfortable....it's ok to be nervous but you should be excitedly nervous not terrified that you are losing your lover. The aftermath can be greatly lessened if you are comfortable going into the experience. The time after is when you should be feeling SO close to your partner, you should feel like you have shared something AMAZING! You should feel like you have learned things about yourself and your partner and be able to discuss them openly. You should be lavishing attention on your partner and REVELING in the naughtiness that you TWO have shared. Even though I have two permanent partners we do this for each other all the time.
I wish you both the best and I hope you have an amazing experience that gives you an amazing shared story and a naughty sparkle in your eye when you see each other. I hope you find this to be an enriching activity that may or may not lead to other things. Please, though if you are feeling apprehensive take the time it takes to think this through...sex isn't going away and you'll never be to old to find someone who is looking for a -moresome.
