Hey Airen,
Are you saying that you have Sigel and a relationship with another guy or am I misunderstanding?

Its a hard one. I know some people who have done great with the lifestyle and other relationships that ended because one partner would not take it.

It IS a hard thing to decide about. I know My Man very well. He thinks with his dick. Really. When we're in the heat of things, yeah, I'm sure his fantasies just flow towards a trio or quad (nothing wrong with that, mine do too) but, he has also expressed jealousy towards men I dated while we WERE in an Open Relationship. That was a long time ago, and he says, "I can handle it." But, I really don't know.

Then there's the logistics of it. With many, (most) quads and swinging, condoms are mandatory, he hates them. I need non-latex, which is hard to find in his size. He doesn't think "It will be a problem. There are other couples who won't mind not using them." But, you don't really know someone's sexual history that well. I think condoms would be necessary.

It's difficult. I don't see it happening any time soon.

A Soft Swap would be a good bridge, I think. I would at least REQUIRE that before going further.