How many is too many in a relationship?

Contributor: indiechick indiechick
how many people in a poly relationship is too many? Numbers are in to addition to yourself so if I say 2 that's you plus 2 others
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
3
12  (48%)
4-5
6  (24%)
6-7
5  (20%)
More than once a day 7
2  (8%)
Total votes: 25
Poll is closed
05/04/2012
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Contributor: VelvetDragon VelvetDragon
Too many? No such thing. For ME I don't want to add anyone to the relationship, but that has nothing to do with a rule about it being "too many".

I would say that depends on the individuals involved and the dynamic of the relationship. There's no hard and fast rule that would apply to every poly relationship. I know people with VERY big relationship networks. Random made-up example, A and B are a couple, B and C and E are an equal triad, and E is with B and F, A is also with F, etc. etc. That WORKS FOR THEM and that's their business. I couldn't set a "rule" for how many is too many for them. That's as bad, to me, as saying two men shouldn't be together or whatever.

I'm in an equal triad, and we're happy like this -- for now. That doesn't mean it will always stay that way, of course!
05/05/2012
Contributor: indiechick indiechick
Quote:
Originally posted by indiechick
how many people in a poly relationship is too many? Numbers are in to addition to yourself so if I say 2 that's you plus 2 others
Better question...WHAT IS THE BEST NUMBER IN YOUR OPINION? and when does it start getting messy and too complicated
05/05/2012
Contributor: VelvetDragon VelvetDragon
Quote:
Originally posted by indiechick
Better question...WHAT IS THE BEST NUMBER IN YOUR OPINION? and when does it start getting messy and too complicated
Depends on the relationship and people involved! For some people, ONE partner is too messy and complicated. *lol* I know many people who shouldn't be dating at all....
05/06/2012
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by indiechick
how many people in a poly relationship is too many? Numbers are in to addition to yourself so if I say 2 that's you plus 2 others
It's too many when you start having issues with time management. Love may be unlimited but time sure as hell ain't! So long as your partners/playmates/spe cial friends feel as though they are cared for and generally happy then you're good to go.
05/06/2012
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by indiechick
Better question...WHAT IS THE BEST NUMBER IN YOUR OPINION? and when does it start getting messy and too complicated
The best number is whatever has the greatest amount of pleasure for everyone involved! It starts getting messy and complicated the minute one person adds one person to his/her life. The real question is how much time do you have to spend with each partner so that he/she is content with the relationship? That can only be answered by each individual person.
05/06/2012
Contributor: indiechick indiechick
interesting responses
05/06/2012
Contributor: VelvetDragon VelvetDragon
Quote:
Originally posted by Airen Wolf
The best number is whatever has the greatest amount of pleasure for everyone involved! It starts getting messy and complicated the minute one person adds one person to his/her life. The real question is how much time do you have to spend with each ... more
Brilliant response.
05/06/2012
Contributor: SkinFlute SkinFlute
It is what you make it. I don't think a single answer covers everyone!
05/25/2012
Contributor: SubmissiveFeminist SubmissiveFeminist
You can't pick a number. It is up to the people involved, for sure.
07/08/2012
Contributor: animepanda89 animepanda89
depends on the people but I prefer less
07/10/2012
Contributor: SmutGeek SmutGeek
Hard to say. That would be like saying I can have up to 3 people but those people are in relationships so it could be 6 or more...
And then there's the relationship itself. There are people I might be in a relationship that's platonic and others that are sexual, some that are BDSM related and others that are Ageplay and still others that are vanilla.

Right now its 2 plus me and it feels just right but that could change in the future and I'd hate to limit my emotional growth.
08/02/2012
Contributor: geekkink geekkink
Honestly if everyone is happy the limit is nothing, however I've seen when you get past five total stuff really starts to fall apart. When I say that I mean five functioning as a single family unit, swinging and once a month fun with others is mehh.
08/02/2012
Contributor: x203 x203
The range of responses is really interesting !
08/18/2012
Contributor: LadyRelentless LadyRelentless
It's so very person dependent! I've been in one on one relationships that were ever so much more complicated then weirder situations I've been in.

One of the most fun, playful, loving, situations I've ever been in involved a boygirl couple, a girlgirl couple, me, and another man. It lasted for several months, and was fantastic. Eventually the boygirl couple and the girlgirl couple..er..switched, and me and the other man wound up partners on the other side of the country from the other 4. But it was all pretty low drama and pleasant the whole time.
08/19/2012
Contributor: Noelle Noelle
Quote:
Originally posted by indiechick
how many people in a poly relationship is too many? Numbers are in to addition to yourself so if I say 2 that's you plus 2 others
I say 3, but I don't like to share! Think it's great that it works for others though!
08/19/2012
Contributor: pix pix
I don't think that there's a universally applicable "too many" but for me I think I would have trouble establishing intimacy with more than 4 other people at once.
08/20/2012
Contributor: Boyfriend Boyfriend
I like me and one other person in a relationship.
08/20/2012
Contributor: damnbul12 damnbul12
3 or more is too many
08/21/2012