The New Intimacy

Are Expensive Weddings Worth It?

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Contributor: Ansley Ansley
I'm watching Dr. Phil right now and the title of the show is "Bridal Betrayal". One of the women spent almost $30K on the wedding, only to be left standing at the altar. I have also heard of several marriages being crushed by the debt of a really expensive wedding and don't even get me started about Bridezillas.

How much was your wedding (approx.)? Did you want to spend more or less? Any other insight you would like to share is more than welcome.
08/05/2011
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Contributor: AngelvMaynard AngelvMaynard
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
I'm watching Dr. Phil right now and the title of the show is "Bridal Betrayal". One of the women spent almost $30K on the wedding, only to be left standing at the altar. I have also heard of several marriages being crushed by the debt ... more
Ours was around 10K; my Mom's idea. We really did want to run off to Vegas, but my Mom would have none of that. She wanted a big southern wedding. I honestly think if you have the cash to blow, go for it! But most of the time it's the guests that enjoy the day more than the couple. It all goes by in a blur. I say save the money, have an intimate day and buy a house instead!
08/05/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelvMaynard
Ours was around 10K; my Mom's idea. We really did want to run off to Vegas, but my Mom would have none of that. She wanted a big southern wedding. I honestly think if you have the cash to blow, go for it! But most of the time it's the guests ... more
Yeah, no big Southern wedding here. Though, I had always been raised to believe that's how it would go down for me. (I always call him my husband, but we aren't legally married). We're going Vegas-style or doing a very simple civil ceremony in his hometown.
08/05/2011
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Ours was also about 10k, and it was something I had wanted to do. We'd have been just as married by going to the courthouse and signing the papers there, but I wanted the day. We saved up our own money for it because we were and still are in a position where we can save for a house without having a ton of monthly expenses. Sure, we live with my mom, but my mom's kinda cool and we don't have to pay rent. I also knew that if we got the house first, it'd take a lot longer to set aside the money for the wedding, so we did that first.
08/05/2011
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
I'm not a big fan of huge expensive weddings. They just make me feel awkward.

It's all about the reception for me
08/05/2011
Contributor: Sir Sir
I think that it's worth if if there's a level of trust to make it worth it, you know? It's a very, very special day.
08/05/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
I'm not a big fan of huge expensive weddings. They just make me feel awkward.

It's all about the reception for me
Yeah, we're poor so even if I wanted one it's never going to happen like that. I can't even convince my mom to actually buy my dress, let alone anything else. I think we'll have something very similar to Lily and Marshall's wedding from HIMYM. (The real one, not the one inside.)
08/05/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Sir
I think that it's worth if if there's a level of trust to make it worth it, you know? It's a very, very special day.
That's so sweet! And uplifting, for some reason.
08/05/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Jul!a
Ours was also about 10k, and it was something I had wanted to do. We'd have been just as married by going to the courthouse and signing the papers there, but I wanted the day. We saved up our own money for it because we were and still are in a ... more
In this day and age you could have done both! LOL That's one thing I'm looking forward to as a first-time home buyer -- no down payment and a super low price on a very nice house.
08/05/2011
Contributor: Starkiller87 Starkiller87
I don't want a big wedding at all. I want just immediate family at a nice restaurant. I don't understand how people invite 300 plus, how do you even know that many people. I wouldn't even want to invite 50 people. Weddings are very odd to me. I want a yummy cake though so that's where the budget would go, nothing huge just something insanely amazing to taste.
08/05/2011
Contributor: Chilipepper Chilipepper
My first wedding was less than $1K - most of the money went into the reception hall and the deejay. In the end, when we divorced later, I'm glad we didn't spend a ton of money.

If I should ever get married again, I want a private ceremony on the beach and spend the money on the reception (maybe a wine and cheese with a Jazz trio or something). I'd prefer something classy the second time around.
08/05/2011
Contributor: PassionQT PassionQT
I think they are overrated, but hey, if you can afford it, go for it. My first wedding was about 10K, that lasted about 1 year. Second time spend all of $500 and we'll be celebrating 15 years of marriage next week.
08/05/2011
Contributor: AngelvMaynard AngelvMaynard
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
Yeah, no big Southern wedding here. Though, I had always been raised to believe that's how it would go down for me. (I always call him my husband, but we aren't legally married). We're going Vegas-style or doing a very simple civil ... more
My friend got married in Vegas. They took close family and friends and it was an amazing time!
08/05/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by AngelvMaynard
My friend got married in Vegas. They took close family and friends and it was an amazing time!
It would be the first time we were in Vegas and I'm sure his family would be all about it! Once we get a few other things figured out, we'll look into it more. We've been together this long, we're in no rush.
08/05/2011
Contributor: AngelvMaynard AngelvMaynard
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
It would be the first time we were in Vegas and I'm sure his family would be all about it! Once we get a few other things figured out, we'll look into it more. We've been together this long, we're in no rush.
Yeah! Take your time. Do it when you're ready and it's right.
08/05/2011
Contributor: TameTemptress TameTemptress
We spent maybe $500, and that was including my dress. We had planned on just going to the courthouse, but our mothers got together and had other ideas. We had a small wedding...20 or so guests and we prepared our own food, but it was nice and intimate and the most important people were there that way.

We had planned to have a big wedding later on if we just did the courthouse thing, but with the small wedding we had, we've never felt the need to have anything bigger.
08/05/2011
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
In this day and age you could have done both! LOL That's one thing I'm looking forward to as a first-time home buyer -- no down payment and a super low price on a very nice house.
We wanted to go in with a down payment on a foreclosed house so that there was less to pay off in the long run. We figure once we hit a certain amount we'll start looking and the longer it takes us to find a place, the more money we have to play with. I've seen some houses in the area that we could theoretically buy outright if we save for an extra year or so.
08/05/2011
Contributor: Sammi Sammi
Ours was, maybe, $1000? That included the hotel, plane flight, dress, license, flowers, the whole shabang.
08/05/2011
Contributor: Wildchild Wildchild
I did the Justice of the peace thing twice, saved money too. Had one reception at a firehall and that was good. When we say our do's this time, I actually wanna do a small church with a nice reception. We don't want to spend more than a few thousand. I hope we can pull this off. Incase your wondering we've been together so long it awkward to refer to each other as bf/gf.
08/05/2011
Contributor: Annemarie Annemarie
It would not be very efficient for me and my boyfriend. I have a very small family (3 people--my dad, an aunt, and a great-uncle), and his family is abroad. Neither of us have lots of friends. So, we're doing the courthouse thing.

Is it what I want? Not really, but it'd be stupid to have a whole to do about it, when it's just for a few people. Also, it means more money to spend on the honeymoon!
08/05/2011
Contributor: GravyCakes GravyCakes
i'm not married, but i did learn that the average wedding is $25K. which is soooo much money. my dad once told me he would pay us $10K to elope & to use that money to make a down payment on a house, lol.
08/05/2011
Contributor: married with children married with children
we just filled out some paper work, no wedding to speak of. They are way too much money. We did not want to start out the marriage in the hole. We did spend a month in japan for our honeymoon.
08/06/2011
Contributor: Ryuson Ryuson
(Review Program Mentor)
I wouldn't spend more than $2,000 on one!
08/06/2011
Contributor: MJ1337 MJ1337
I'd probably spend about 30k. It just depends on how many people you're expecting.. If I got married, I would have.. too many people to count
08/06/2011
Contributor: SexyLilPixi SexyLilPixi
Quote:
Originally posted by Sir
I think that it's worth if if there's a level of trust to make it worth it, you know? It's a very, very special day.
I have to agree with this.
08/06/2011
Contributor: pixxie87 pixxie87
I would rather spend big bucks on nice furniture... Wedding day is only one day
08/06/2011
Contributor: Orion Orion
We went to the justice of peace so was pretty much free.
08/06/2011
Contributor: slynch slynch
Both of mine were inexpensive (under $1000). I can't rationalize spending 10-20K or more on a wedding.
08/06/2011
Contributor: Tasty Latina Tasty Latina
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
I'm watching Dr. Phil right now and the title of the show is "Bridal Betrayal". One of the women spent almost $30K on the wedding, only to be left standing at the altar. I have also heard of several marriages being crushed by the debt ... more
don't waste your money. Times are hard and I'm sure you can use that money for a home or something like that. I'm getting married soon and we've decided to go to the beach, that way decorations are not needed and after that we are going back to the house we just bought to have drinks and dinner with only 10 people. Real immediate family and mine and his best friend.
08/06/2011
Contributor: Vanessa Weiss Vanessa Weiss
Ideally, I'd like to go to city hall, sign the paperwork with a judge and then go out to a nightclub. In a wedding dress.



I'd rather save my cash for an awesome vacation or something to celebrate!
08/06/2011