Well, I was going to link you to the scene in Closer when Natalie Portman is dancing. And then again to the scene from the Barsky Show where a listener gets her first lap dance and then to the scene in Domino that would give a REALLY good look at lapdances...but all have been flagged as material for the over 18 crowd on Youtube and I don't have an account.
So, I'll share my lap dance experience. I paid her $20, she took it from my between my teeth. And basically she stood two inches from me for the first 2.5 minutes of the 3.5 minute song twisting and gyrating her hips, bending over, rubbing her breasts together, and then for the last minute of the song she straddled me. During the last minute is when she was grinding against me, doing twirls with her hair/head and rubbing her chest against mine...
It didn't do much for me other than make me feel bad for the girl. But, hey it was the first time I had been in a club, let alone had a naked woman dancing two inches in front of me.
If you're willing to sign up for an account on youtube or already have one, search for Natalie Portman in Closer, Barsky show lap dance, and Domino lap dance.
Sorry if this isn't much help.