The New Intimacy

how do i get my boyfriend to open up?

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Contributor: ninaspinkturtle ninaspinkturtle
i want to know whats a good idea to do to get my boyfriend to open up about his fantasies...any suggestions?
01/18/2011
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Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
I'd bring it up to him in as non threatening of a way as possible. Maybe do something romantic together, then open up and share one of yours to try and get the ball rolling.
01/18/2011
Contributor: Lucidity Lucidity
I was also going to suggest you start. But for sure, wait for a moment when you feel connected and open. Make him feel comfortable and like you wouldn't judge him, and make sure you don't.

For some people it just takes time and trust.
01/18/2011
Contributor: Vaccinium Vaccinium
Offer to do anything you possibly can to make one of his fantasies come true. Of course, you need to mean that and go through it-- no matter what it is.
01/19/2011
Contributor: Orion Orion
Just ask him lol i mean hell he should be happy to give up some fantasies specially if he thought you might do them.
01/21/2011
Contributor: ScottA ScottA
My idea would be to take a guess about what you think one is that he might be interested in and he might think that you weren't interested in, then suggest it yourself. Many guys worry that their fantasies will turn off their partner. Even if you do them he might be worried about what you would think.

"She might think I'm gay" is one of the top reasons given for why interested guys don't ask about anal play.
01/21/2011
Contributor: Crash Crash
I'd suggest a site like mojoupgrade.com I found it pretty useful with my girlfriend. We try to be open, and this website has you take a quiz separately that asks a bunch of questions about fantasies you might have and then if you are both willing to try something, it will show up in the results, but if one of you says no then the results won't mention it.
01/30/2011
Contributor: Xavier7 Xavier7
Quote:
Originally posted by Jul!a
I'd bring it up to him in as non threatening of a way as possible. Maybe do something romantic together, then open up and share one of yours to try and get the ball rolling.
I was going to say the same thing.
01/31/2011
Contributor: ScottA ScottA
Quote:
Originally posted by Crash
I'd suggest a site like mojoupgrade.com I found it pretty useful with my girlfriend. We try to be open, and this website has you take a quiz separately that asks a bunch of questions about fantasies you might have and then if you are both ... more
Interesting.
01/31/2011