I'm conflicted... One part of me says, "It's a slow-paced sex game for people who like a battle of the wits as foreplay, that could be a kinky addition to the collection," while the other part of me thinks that I'd be too impatient to play an entire chess game with dildos staring right at me.
Let's see what toys we can come up with for a much cheaper version. Any thoughts on what toys for what pieces, keeping in mind their allowed moves in the game?
King: 1--Pretty much worthless and really nothing more than a mere figure-head. By the rules of chess, his moves are pretty limited, he can only move one square at a time but he can move forward, backward, left, right and diagonally. Has to be protected at all costs, or the game is over.
Queen: 1--She's the most powerful chess piece on the chessboard. She can move vertically, horizontally, and diagonally just as many squares she wants (without jumping other chess pieces).
Rook: 2--The rook is also called the castle by some. The rook, as per chess rules, moves just like the queen except it can't move diagonally. Just forward, backward, left, and right but as many spaces as desired without jumping other chess pieces.
Bishop: 2-- There are two bishops, always one on a light square and one on a dark square. Bishops move diagonally only just as many spaces as desired without jumping another chess piece. Because bishops move diagonally, they always remain on their original square color.
Knights:2-- The knight is the most unique chess piece, it is the only chess piece that can jump over another chess piece or pieces. The knight's move is rather different. Think of the move as "L" shaped - two squares either forward, backward, left, or right, and then left or right one square.
Pawns: 8-- They're expected to advance out in front and take the brunt of an oncoming attack or serve as a shield. These chess piece are allowed to only move one square at at time by the rules of chess. However, in their first move, they can move two squares if they want. They can only move straight forward - no retreating, and they can only capture one of the enemy by approaching diagonally. But, according t the chess rules, if one of these brave little soldiers can make it to the other side, they are rewarded with a promotion - to a queen!
This is starting to grow on me. Now that I've looked at it a few more times, I can guess at which toys are which pieces, and now all manner of ideas are popping into my head. I have about £100, I don't suppose one of you could loan me the other £9,900?
I don't know how to play chess though I have a general idea what it's about. I think it'd be hard to have kinky fun with the pieces, and put them back to play. It seems kinda unhygienic to me. I think I'd rather play chess and whoever wins gets some sexual reward.
