The New Intimacy

When you help out another person, (on EF and in your daily life), do you..........

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Contributor: js250 js250
1-Tell everyone to get the credit for helping out.

2-Just tell close friends and family.

3-Just tell others you are close to on the internet.

4-Facebook!!!!

5-Shut up, there is no point in talking about it.

6-other????

Please explain your reasoning, if you would. Also if you could tell me your thoughts about how others or your family/friends react to your response, that would be wonderful!!

My husband and I were talking about this last night and he said I was really abnormal in my way of thinking, that most people do not think or act as I do after helping someone. Okay, enough of the book!!
04/05/2012
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Contributor: Badass Badass
I generally do what I do and forget about it...

I try to make it an active part of my life to help others...
04/05/2012
Contributor: mpfm mpfm
I would tell my husband because we talk about everything. It would stop there, though. Like Badass, I just do what I need to and then go about my day.
04/05/2012
Contributor: Gracie Gracie
It really depends on the situation. I generally do what I think is best and dont really think about it. I don't say much about it to anyone. I'm not interested in getting credit, and the person I helped might feel embarassed if I was discussing their situation with others. It is my policy not to discuss other peoples business.
04/05/2012
Contributor: js250 js250
I am always trying to help someone in some way. I really like the happiness that I feel inside and am content that I was able to provide a service, advice or other task to help ease someone else's day. I know that when I need some help and there is someone there to help me I am so overjoyed and grateful that I like to pass that bit of relief to others.

I don't tell anyone unless I am asked. Usually specifically. By my husband. I help for my own piece of mind and happiness as well as to provide assistance, relief or just a 'friend' to others. Not for other people's knowledge, kudos or to get credit points.

It does not matter to me if it is my daily life or here on the site, it still means I am able to ease someone else's concerns, burdens or what not.

My husband was actually speechless last night...he sat by me as I checked my email. Asked me who everyone was that emailed me and was stunned when I told him. !@$# is from EF, )(*is from LP, 987 is from ebay, etc. (UMMMM--I did NOT show him any of my messages here on EF, those are private and get deleted after I answer them.)

That is when he told me I was a human doormat. I am not a doormat, just a quiet, background helper. Right??? Sorry, that is the whole stem of this thread.
04/05/2012
Contributor: Gracie Gracie
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
I am always trying to help someone in some way. I really like the happiness that I feel inside and am content that I was able to provide a service, advice or other task to help ease someone else's day. I know that when I need some help and there ... more
Being helpful doesn't make you a doormat. I think it is just our maternal instinct coming out. Letting people walk all over you or enabling others to avoid their responsibilities would make you a doormat. I don't hear you saying anything that indicates that is case here.
04/05/2012
Contributor: underHim underHim
I usually dont really tell people too much because then I feel like they will think I am being upitty about helping someone. I really worry way too much about what others think of me. I dont like that about myself.
04/05/2012
Contributor: js250 js250
Quote:
Originally posted by Gracie
Being helpful doesn't make you a doormat. I think it is just our maternal instinct coming out. Letting people walk all over you or enabling others to avoid their responsibilities would make you a doormat. I don't hear you saying anything ... more
Thank you. I did not feel like it was making me a doormat, the people I help either take me up on an offer to help, read about an offer to help or are completely random strangers who just need another set of hands, ears, a break or $2.00(my limit for strangers). They are not just coming up to me out of the blue and demanding that I help them.

I would not have stopped, that is who I am, however I was a bit upset and worried about it--thinking maybe I did have a problem.
04/05/2012