What if your girlfriend/wife needed a breast reduction?

Contributor: Blinker Blinker
After visiting my doctor for migraines, she suggested the root cause to the tension in my neck and back causing these migraines is probably my rack (Monday, I have an MRI to make sure it's not blood clots or worms). I wear a 38DD and they just hurt all the time. She said I'd be a great candidate for a breast reduction procedure, which my insurance covers if medically necessary. I've been bouncing the idea around in my head and I think I would do it, if for nothing else than to relieve the tension and back pain caused by my boobs. That and no one really knows what my face looks like because my tits enter a room before I do.

I realize that breast reduction surgery carries with it many risks and complications, such as decreased or absent feelings in the breasts and nipples and usually losing the ability to breastfeed. I'm willing to deal with the sensation loss if it relieves my headaches.

My boyfriend's reaction was...less than admirable or supportive. "As long as you lose weight so that your smaller boobs are proportional, then get the surgery."

After a long coversation, he thinks that skinny women and curvier women such as myself look best with big boobs, but curvier women don't "look right" with smaller boobs. Geez, I'm just going down to a C cup if I get the procedure.

I know many of you are all like TL;DR, but that's my story. My reaction to the boyfriend's response? I told him how he sounded, how it felt, yelled at him (it was over Yahoo messenger so it wasn't the same as yelling but it LOOKED LIKE THIS!) and he hasn't said much since.

What do you think?
Guys, what would be your response to your girl's news of having a breast reduction surgery?
Girls, what if your man acted like a douche?
Did I overreact?

I'd just like some of the community's input because yous guys are the most varied sampling of opinions like EVAR.
10/02/2010
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Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Knowing how much it would help the wife, I would make the arrangements for her. She is not as large as some but still, I/she feels that a reduction would only benefit her back and neck.

Oh and smack that boy silly when you see him next! Really? WTF was he thinking?
10/02/2010
Contributor: Blinker Blinker
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
Knowing how much it would help the wife, I would make the arrangements for her. She is not as large as some but still, I/she feels that a reduction would only benefit her back and neck.

Oh and smack that boy silly when you see him next! ... more
Tim, I'm definitely going to have to smack him upside his head for saying those things to me. He honestly doesn't seem to understand why it made me so upset, but apparently you did, so I thnak you for that.
10/02/2010
Contributor: Alicia Alicia
If it would make my life easier and cause me less pain my husband would be all for it and would be 100% supportive. I think your boyfriend needs a smack in the head for his comments. Since you can't do that I think you should hold onto the slap and give it at a time he least expects in the future..kind of like Slapsgiving on HIMYM...

A size C is still substantial, especially a full C. My friend got a reduction earlier in the year and sometimes she does miss her larger breasts but she has so much less pain and she finds that more than worth it. She has found that her style of clothing change and that some of her old shirts make her feel frumpy when they used to make her feel sexy. That was easy enough to fix though with just buying new shirts to match her new shape.
10/02/2010
Contributor: Chilipepper Chilipepper
You know how I feel. Health and (literal) peace of mind are more important.
10/02/2010
Contributor: nolongerhere nolongerhere
Lucille Bluth

When I was 16, I had a breast reduction and I really think it might have been the most important thing I ever did for my self-esteem. They were huge! I was 145 pounds, 5'6 and I was probably a 34 F or higher...I mean, I got teased, couldn't participate in athletics, couldn't find clothes, and was a wall-flower...then I had my surgery and I was a totally different person. I had confidence, I was happy, and I didn't have pain anymore. I can't imagine how my life would have been different if I hadn't taken that route...

A man cannot relate to how having large, pendulous, or generally pain-in-the-ass breasts, he should never make you feel like you won't be beautiful! The female body is beautiful in all forms, and a woman's perception of herself (I think) really can affect how she projects herself... I feel so much more proportional now, I see myself as way more sexy than I was and now act that way...I just feel normal. I am not thin, but I am now a reasonable breast size, my husband loves my breasts and I would have been embarrassed to talk to him before my surgery, much less show him my breasts...I think that if you don't feel good about yourself, have pain, and think you would like to have the surgery, you should. I went home the same day, healed really fast, and was water-skiing in 2 months. I didn't think it was especially painful and my scars had faded to almost nothing after 2 years...Just make sure you research and interview docs, take references and you will be fine! Good luck! If you have questions about the procedure or my experience let me know!
10/02/2010
Contributor: ~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
When I was younger, before I grew into my boobs (so to speak), I did have some stress in my back. At my age now, I have a strong back and good posture. BUT, if I was still having the same tension and pains, I would be bouncing the idea around too. My boobs are not as large as yours (~34 D, sometimes a DD bra) but I do understand what you are saying.

Your boyfriend's reaction appalls me. Was that an ultimatum? I would be upset too! I don't know your exact body type height etc., but a size C is still a good size and by no means flat chested. I think that you going down to a size C would give you even more confidence than you already have. You could wear all sorts of stuff that larger chested women have difficulty doing.

So, I asked my boyfriend. If I were in the same situation as you he would support it. He was more concerned about the breast feeding than anything else. He has seen pictures of me as a size C when I was younger and thought I was hot then too. He did say that shorter, curvier women, do look larger and less proportioned if their chests are small. But him and I agreed that a size C isn't a small chest and won't look like one unless you are far overweight.
Plus...by losing this weight on your chest you will be able to be more active and will probably lose a bit of weight elsewhere anyways.

You totally did not over react though. My boyfriend also said, that while he holds the above opinion, you don't say that to your girlfriend. He ruled douche on this too.

Really...what you lose in boobs, you will make up in tremendous confidence. RexyRn gave a perfect example of it.
10/02/2010
Contributor: Blinker Blinker
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
When I was younger, before I grew into my boobs (so to speak), I did have some stress in my back. At my age now, I have a strong back and good posture. BUT, if I was still having the same tension and pains, I would be bouncing the idea around too. My ... more
Thanks, Lauren. Getting a breast reduction would definitely boost my confidence and kind of give me that jump-start to continue my exercise regimen. My boobs just hurt and are a pain when I try to exercise. I have to wear 2 sports bras to stop myself from getting hit in the face.

I really apprecaite your input
10/02/2010
Contributor: Kindred Kindred
The human body is beautiful in all it's shapes and forms. Tell your boyfriend that your breasts do not define who you are and remind him that it is for medical reasons. Then slap him in the head and tell him that sex hurts and he's going to have to get a penis reduction.
10/02/2010
Contributor: Blinker Blinker
Quote:
Originally posted by nolongerhere
Lucille Bluth

When I was 16, I had a breast reduction and I really think it might have been the most important thing I ever did for my self-esteem. They were huge! I was 145 pounds, 5'6 and I was probably a 34 F or higher...I mean, I got ... more
I think you may have summed up what's in my head, girl. Scars don't bother me, and neither does my boyfriend's dumb-assed comments. I'm going to get the surgery for ME, not him. And if he doesn't like the way I look or can't live with it, that's his loss
10/02/2010
Contributor: Viktor Vysheslav Malkin Viktor Vysheslav Malkin
Quote:
Originally posted by Blinker
After visiting my doctor for migraines, she suggested the root cause to the tension in my neck and back causing these migraines is probably my rack (Monday, I have an MRI to make sure it's not blood clots or worms). I wear a 38DD and they just ... more
If my girlfriend needed it then she should get it. I only care about her, fuck anything else. Whatever is going to maker her life easier/bette/healthier I am for it.
10/03/2010
Contributor: ~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
Quote:
Originally posted by Blinker
Thanks, Lauren. Getting a breast reduction would definitely boost my confidence and kind of give me that jump-start to continue my exercise regimen. My boobs just hurt and are a pain when I try to exercise. I have to wear 2 sports bras to stop myself ... more
Welcome. I TOTALLY understand what you mean. Again, mine are not QUITE as large, but I wish I could run comfortably. I also wear 2 sports bras to reduce discomfort. Black eyes are no fun lol.

Who knows...maybe you will even have more energy from not having to lug them around all the time!

I wish you the best of luck. Keep us updated? I have a friend considering this same thing.
10/03/2010
Contributor: Illusional Illusional
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
When I was younger, before I grew into my boobs (so to speak), I did have some stress in my back. At my age now, I have a strong back and good posture. BUT, if I was still having the same tension and pains, I would be bouncing the idea around too. My ... more
I also asked my boyfriend and he was all for me being happier and healthier.
I have D's now, and I'm 5'11. So I kinda wanna big boobs, but he'd love me either way.
Smack him.
10/03/2010
Contributor: Throwingawaysoon Throwingawaysoon
I love my wife's, and I would probably give her puppy dog eyes if she said she was going to get them reduced, but I would still support her, and I would still play with them lots =^.^=
10/03/2010
Contributor: Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
Quote:
Originally posted by Kindred
The human body is beautiful in all it's shapes and forms. Tell your boyfriend that your breasts do not define who you are and remind him that it is for medical reasons. Then slap him in the head and tell him that sex hurts and he's going to ... more
LOL! Love this.
10/03/2010
Contributor: Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
I agree with what everyone else has already said. I think your boyfriend must have had a momentary lapse of all judgment when he texted that comment to you. Yes, he most definitely was a douche. And no, you did not overreact. He should be glad he is so far away from you right now that he cannot receive his well-deserved smack upside his head!

My husband loves larger breasts and he would be opposed to me having a reduction. But, if I had continuous migraines and there was a strong chance that a breast reduction would alleviate them, I would definitely want the surgery, regardless of what he thinks. Health concerns trump personal preferences. Plus, you said your breasts cause you back pain. This is yet another excellent reason for a breast reduction, in and of itself, without even factoring in the additional problem of migraines. Finally, just think how much better you would feel and how much more energy you would have if you no longer had those awful migraines (I know how they feel, I just thankfully do not get them as often any more) and back aches. Tell your boyfriend that he will be on the receiving end of a very cranky disposition if you do not do something to help "take a load off" your straining body (and smack him again upside the head as you say this, if only in your imagination ).

Oh, and best wishes and good luck as you continue contemplating your choices!
10/03/2010
Contributor: Trashley Trashley
Quote:
Originally posted by Blinker
After visiting my doctor for migraines, she suggested the root cause to the tension in my neck and back causing these migraines is probably my rack (Monday, I have an MRI to make sure it's not blood clots or worms). I wear a 38DD and they just ... more
A few of my dad's girlfriends have gotten the procedure, and I understand why. These things are freakin' heavy! And sometimes having huge boobs makes you just look bigger than you really are which can be a bummer. When I check out girls and temporarily allow myself to superficially pass judgement on them, I'll admit it, I love curvy girls, but not if they don't have tits. It's a weird thing. I just like natural proportion.

But if I was with my girlfriend/boyfriend I would NEVER say anything like that. It's rude and inconsiderate. It's for your freaking health! And what's more important that that? Tit sex? I don't think so.
10/03/2010