The New Intimacy

What do you do when you're not in the mood, but your partner is?

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Contributor: ViVix ViVix
Sometimes one person really wants it, and the other is just tired, feeling unattractive, etc. Assuming you are the one that's not in the mood for it, do you give in, do you fake a headache or other ailment, etc.?
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
I give in. Once you get started, you get in the mood.
The Mother of a SiNner , Gracie , Taylor , ellejay , DreamWolf , dv8 , bayosgirl
7  (39%)
I fake an ailment or flat out say
Me? Not in the mood? You must be crazy.
TitsMcScandal , Incendiaire , Gunsmoke , Kissaki , El-Jaro , geliebt , Beck
7  (39%)
Other. Explain.
Rossie , Mwar , Ciao. , Airen Wolf
4  (22%)
Total votes: 18
Poll is closed
02/29/2012
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Contributor: ViVix ViVix
Btw...I don't know what happened, but the 2nd answer was supposed to say you fake an ailment or flat out say "not gonna happen!"
02/29/2012
Contributor: The Mother of a SiNner The Mother of a SiNner
Quote:
Originally posted by ViVix
Sometimes one person really wants it, and the other is just tired, feeling unattractive, etc. Assuming you are the one that's not in the mood for it, do you give in, do you fake a headache or other ailment, etc.?
i give in
02/29/2012
Contributor: Rossie Rossie
I'll explain to my husband why I'm not in the mood, and do it some other time or day.
02/29/2012
Contributor: TitsMcScandal TitsMcScandal
That never happens. It is always the other way around. Even if I'm not 100% of the way there, I'll get into it in the first minute.
02/29/2012
Contributor: Mwar Mwar
Depends. I almost never turn him down. Usually I'll tell him to convince me. He's usually good at that!
02/29/2012
Contributor: Ciao. Ciao.
It really depends, and I've definitely had plenty of times where I've just been not in the mood at all due to stress, sleepiness, or something else. Generally I can get myself into the mood to please my partner but if I am really just not feeling it I come straight out with that. Why lie about it?
02/29/2012
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
As many men will attest - the issue is more of their female partner not being in the mood. If she initiated sexual activity, then I'd have to consider the question - but as it is now, I initiate when my interested - simple equation.
02/29/2012
Contributor: Gracie Gracie
Quote:
Originally posted by Gunsmoke
As many men will attest - the issue is more of their female partner not being in the mood. If she initiated sexual activity, then I'd have to consider the question - but as it is now, I initiate when my interested - simple equation.
I respectfully disagree, in many traditional relationships the female is the one who desires sex more frequently. I understand in your marriage it is you, but in my marriage it was more common that he was the one saying "not tonight I'm too tired." So if he initiates I say yes because I know how bad it feels to be turned down repeatedly.
02/29/2012
Contributor: ellejay ellejay
I can usually be persuaded.
02/29/2012
Contributor: geliebt geliebt
It's never me who's not into it at least, that's only happened a small little handful of times and certainly not recently. But usually when my partner isn't in the mood, we tend to just not have sex.. it's kinda hard for me to push the issue that much Sucks, I have a REALLY high sex drive.
02/29/2012
Contributor: Beck Beck
I never not want sex, unless I am very sick.
02/29/2012
Contributor: DreamWolf DreamWolf
I always try to do my best top serve my Master in whatever He desires, and of course there is no time that I wouldn't rush to pleasure Him whenever He wants it!!!

I am much more often in the mood than He is, but it is rather pretty much a mindset, physically I take time, so mostly W/we end up with Him fully pleasured and me waiting for the next time, relying on my toys... Oh well, I should learn to quit running my thoughts constantly like crazy and just relax I assume... ^^ ~blushes
02/29/2012
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
(EF Review Program Mentor)
Quote:
Originally posted by ViVix
Sometimes one person really wants it, and the other is just tired, feeling unattractive, etc. Assuming you are the one that's not in the mood for it, do you give in, do you fake a headache or other ailment, etc.?
We don't fake ailments but we might just mention that we are tired or not feeling well. Sometimes I will do my best to get into the mood or just show him (whichever him is asking ) a good time.
02/29/2012
Contributor: Modern^Spank^Anthem Modern^Spank^Anthem
Suggestions
02/29/2012
Contributor: TheCleansing TheCleansing
At least oral.
02/29/2012
Contributor: hyacinthgirl hyacinthgirl
I always make an effort, which is why I think I should be respected when I just can't. Unfortunately, the few times I couldn't, I wasn't respected.

I figure that if I'm just not up for anything after kissing and cuddling and honestly trying, I'm totally okay with my partner masturbating. Unless I'm extremely sick or extremely tired, I'll even help. But sometimes I just don't want anyone to touch me at all for any reason, and will start panicking if anyone touches me. Anyone with me has got to accept that.
02/29/2012
Contributor: bayosgirl bayosgirl
Most of the time, I make an effort to get in the mood so I can make him happy. But if I'm just too tired or not into it for some reason, I tell him and he backs off.
03/24/2012