The New Intimacy

Truly Terrible Pick-Up Lines

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Contributor: TheCleansing TheCleansing
Saw some pretty bad pickup lines today. My favorite of the day?

"Baby if I flip a coin, any chance I can get some head?"
"No"
"Then I'm sure to get some tail.

So EF, bust out some of your worst pickup lines!
11/27/2011
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Contributor: Mike Honcho Mike Honcho
(Check her shirt tag)

"Just as I thought...... made in heaven."

-----------

Do you have the number to God?

Why?

Because I need to call him and tell him he's missing an angel!

-----------

Is that a mirror in your pocket?

What?

Cause I can see myself in your pants!
11/27/2011
Contributor: Drakoni Drakoni
"I'm a geneticist. Can I unzip you genes?"
11/27/2011
Contributor: - Kira - - Kira -
So this isn't a typical pick up line, but a friend of mine once said "I love your glasses. Can I skeet on them?" No joke. She slapped him. *facepalm* I need new friends.
11/27/2011
Contributor: TheCleansing TheCleansing
Quote:
Originally posted by - Kira -
So this isn't a typical pick up line, but a friend of mine once said "I love your glasses. Can I skeet on them?" No joke. She slapped him. *facepalm* I need new friends.
Wow. That takes balls. o.O
11/27/2011
Contributor: aimtoplease aimtoplease
Is your father a thief? Cause he stole the stars and put them in your eyes
11/27/2011
Contributor: - Kira - - Kira -
Quote:
Originally posted by TheCleansing
Wow. That takes balls. o.O
He was drunk at the time. But yes, yes it does.
11/27/2011
Contributor: Philia Philia
In college, I got the following line:

"Wanna come up to my room and see my snake?"

--Yes, I was drunk and totally oblivious to how ridiculous it sounded. Apparently the friends I was with thought it was hilarious, though.

--So yes, I responded with "cool! a snake!" and went up to his room. (My sister had allergies when I was a kid, so we had weird pets, including several snakes.)

--Yes, he actually had a snake in his room.

--IIRC, we didn't end up fooling around. I think he was a little taken aback that I was actually enthusiastic about hanging out with his snake and more interested in it than his "snake."
11/27/2011
Contributor: TheCleansing TheCleansing
Quote:
Originally posted by Philia
In college, I got the following line:

"Wanna come up to my room and see my snake?"

--Yes, I was drunk and totally oblivious to how ridiculous it sounded. Apparently the friends I was with thought it was hilarious, ... more
This is a legendary story.
11/27/2011
Contributor: T&A1987 T&A1987
some good examples here.

link
11/27/2011
Contributor: GravyCakes GravyCakes
i had a friend who told us how he got a girl's number at a bar by going up to her & doing the following:

he walked up to her, licked his finger, wiped it on her shirt, then said, "lets get you outa those wet clothes."

my friends & i couldn't stop laughing.

after the laughter had subsided, we carried on a new convo which eventually lead me to say to this same friend, "aaawwwww, you're so cute. like a puppy!" which he replied w/ "if i told you i was house trained, would you take me home?" love my friends, they're hilarious.
11/28/2011
Contributor: GenderSexplorations GenderSexplorations
Quote:
Originally posted by Philia
In college, I got the following line:

"Wanna come up to my room and see my snake?"

--Yes, I was drunk and totally oblivious to how ridiculous it sounded. Apparently the friends I was with thought it was hilarious, ... more
Oh my god I think I just died of laughter. Epically awesome story.
11/28/2011