The New Intimacy

Scary, creepy or just plain bizarre sex toys

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Contributor: Ivy Wilde Ivy Wilde
There are some pretty strange sex toys on Eden's site and in other stores. I want to see how many scary, creepy or just plain bizarre sextoys I can find. Things like The Tentacle

and the Jellyfish by whipspider

Or even the Tenticle Magic Twisty

What other scary sex toys do you know of? They don't have to be from EF, they can be from anywhere. Links would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks!
09/30/2011
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Contributor: Yaoi Pervette (deleted) Yaoi Pervette (deleted)
There's a whole blog that covers this topic, Scary Sex Toy Friday. One of the freakiest things I have seen there is The Log Dildo by Oxballs, which is a turd dildo! The Fuck My Face Masturbator by Pipedream is just creepy! It's a rubber head with a suction cup that allows you to stick to walls and such. It has those weird doll eyes that open and close, and the company says you can style its hair if you like. There is also a severed foot toy that has a pussy on the bottom, toys shaped like bugs and scorpions, and double dildo that has a pig's face on the base!
09/30/2011
Contributor: - Kira - - Kira -
Quote:
Originally posted by Yaoi Pervette (deleted)
There's a whole blog that covers this topic, Scary Sex Toy Friday. One of the freakiest things I have seen there is The Log Dildo by Oxballs, which is a turd dildo! The Fuck My Face Masturbator by Pipedream is just creepy! It's a rubber ... more
Are people buying the shit dildo?? I gagged a little in my mouth just now. Ugh... And I thought the tentacle was weird.
09/30/2011
Contributor: Yaoi Pervette (deleted) Yaoi Pervette (deleted)
Quote:
Originally posted by - Kira -
Are people buying the shit dildo?? I gagged a little in my mouth just now. Ugh... And I thought the tentacle was weird.
Someone must buy it, because Oxballs continues to sell it. Actually, their entire website is a goldmine of freaky toys.
09/30/2011
Contributor: kadytheredpanda kadytheredpanda
Four words: baby Jesus butt plug
That is just levels of HELL TO THE NAW for me.


There's also a couple of Cracked articles about bizarre sex toys. Some of the more memorable ones: granny blow-up doll (false teeth included), pig tail butt plug, and the cannon (a cannon shaped dido about the same diameter as a fucking SODA CAN).
09/30/2011
Contributor: AngelvMaynard AngelvMaynard
I can't bring myself to click on the turd link!!
09/30/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
This one always comes to mind...I think it might feel quite good.

09/30/2011
Contributor: Ivy Wilde Ivy Wilde
Wow, there really is some strange stuff out there! Keep it coming!
09/30/2011
Contributor: Ivy Wilde Ivy Wilde
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
This one always comes to mind...I think it might feel quite good.

Where did you find that? I tried searching corn, but it didn't come up.
09/30/2011
Contributor: - Kira - - Kira -
Quote:
Originally posted by Yaoi Pervette (deleted)
Someone must buy it, because Oxballs continues to sell it. Actually, their entire website is a goldmine of freaky toys.
I guess I was kinda hoping they were selling it as a joke item and no one was actually using it. *shudder*
09/30/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by Ivy Wilde
Where did you find that? I tried searching corn, but it didn't come up.
Vibra Dolce I found it in an older thread here
09/30/2011
Contributor: Antipova Antipova
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
This one always comes to mind...I think it might feel quite good.

I was going to go find a picture of the same thing. I totally wish this wasn't discontinued.
09/30/2011
Contributor: Starkiller87 Starkiller87
I Want a tentacle soooo bad. Its number 1 on my want list.
09/30/2011
Contributor: Nora Nora
I could see giving that away as a gag gift, but I can't imagine actually using it if I received one!
09/30/2011
Contributor: kadytheredpanda kadytheredpanda
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
This one always comes to mind...I think it might feel quite good.

WOW.

Babeland also sells an apple shaped vibe, but somehow that doesn't freak me out as much as THAT.
09/30/2011
Contributor: Yaoi Pervette (deleted) Yaoi Pervette (deleted)
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
This one always comes to mind...I think it might feel quite good.

This thing always makes me think of Boku no Sexual Harassment, a yaoi anime in which a corn cob is used anally in one scene.
09/30/2011
Contributor: hyacinthgirl hyacinthgirl
They actually make a Boku no Sexual Harassment corn cob vibrator. It's sold in fetish shops in Japan.
09/30/2011
Contributor: Ivy Wilde Ivy Wilde
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
Vibra Dolce I found it in an older thread here
Thanks!
10/01/2011
Contributor: Ghost Ghost
Now, I love my tentacle, but this stuff is cracking me up.
10/01/2011
Contributor: Shellz31 Shellz31
I really like my Whipspider toys! I'd love to get some other unique dildos, but no desire for the crap one! Ick.
10/01/2011
Contributor: Yaoi Pervette (deleted) Yaoi Pervette (deleted)
Quote:
Originally posted by hyacinthgirl
They actually make a Boku no Sexual Harassment corn cob vibrator. It's sold in fetish shops in Japan.
I've seen pictures of that toy online. Makes me want one just for the funny packaging.
10/01/2011
Contributor: Beck Beck
Quote:
Originally posted by Yaoi Pervette (deleted)
There's a whole blog that covers this topic, Scary Sex Toy Friday. One of the freakiest things I have seen there is The Log Dildo by Oxballs, which is a turd dildo! The Fuck My Face Masturbator by Pipedream is just creepy! It's a rubber ... more
Fuck my face one is creepy!
10/01/2011
Contributor: Beck Beck
Found this link.

This is weird!







The oral sex snorkel
10/01/2011
Contributor: Beck Beck
Quote:
Originally posted by Starkiller87
I Want a tentacle soooo bad. Its number 1 on my want list.
Agree! Although I think I like the JR!
10/01/2011
Contributor: Vanille Vanille
I'm cracking up AND freaking out at the same time.
10/01/2011
Contributor: Antipova Antipova
I love the oral sex snorkel! I am always jolted to attention when my partner has to exhale---clearly some OCD inventor felt the same way I do... but decided to actually make oral sex *more* awkward instead of just living with the reality that people gotta breathe!
10/01/2011
Contributor: Yaoi Pervette (deleted) Yaoi Pervette (deleted)
Something Awful did article on weird sex toys. A few highlights:

Venus Love-Looks like a sea monster that would devour your vagina while you scream in pain!

Pipedream Extreme Rub One Out Masturbator-This is a masturbation sleeve that is advertised as looking and feeling like a real hand. As the article author said, isn't that a bit redundant? We already have to real looking and feeling hands attached to us!

Hannah Harper's Titty Fuck-Her-A vagina between the tits?
10/01/2011
Contributor: Yaoi Pervette (deleted) Yaoi Pervette (deleted)
I was doing some fooling around on Google, and I found this blog post from Hey Epiphora about Topco's "Fucked" line of toys. The line includes such gems as a Bleeding Tampon Pussy Stroker (with blood lube), Shitting Ass and Vomiting mouth strokers (with shit and puke lubes), a prolapsed anus stroker, an amputee love doll, and dildos for people who are sexually attracted to diseased or deformed individuals. Seriously, WTF?! The menstrual fetish toy isn't so bad, but I cringe at the thought and sight (pics in article) of shit and puke lube!
10/01/2011
Contributor: GravyCakes GravyCakes
my bf found 1 that was a butt plug w/ an animal tail on the end. so when it's in your butt, you have a tail. he came across it randomly, & we both laughed about it. i can't find the link to it, though.
10/01/2011