The New Intimacy

How to breastfeed APPROPRIATELY

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Contributor: Peggi Peggi
I feel that every mother should read this article. Fully. No really, before you comment about it, make sure you read all of it

This article is a life-saver because aren't we ALL sick and tired of seeing boobies out in the open just because a kid needs to eat?

I hope you all enjoy this as much as I did! Especially with how many breastfeeding mothers I am friends with!
01/02/2012
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Contributor: badk1tty badk1tty
Quote:
Originally posted by Peggi
I feel that every mother should read this article. Fully. No really, before you comment about it, make sure you read all of it

This article is a life-saver because aren't we ALL sick and tired of seeing boobies out in the open just ... more
I gotta say, I disagree with just about everything in that article. Sure, you -can- use a cover. You -can- use a bathroom. You -can- stay home. But you should't have to.

Smokers offend me. I don't give every smoker I see nasty looks, just because they're smoking and I don't.

People who swear in public places offend me. I don't go up to them and get in their face about it.

I could keep going with lists and lists of things that offend me, but the reality is that breastfeeding is natural, normal, and THE healthiest thing for your children.

If you don't like it, don't look. No one's asking you to stare at my tits.
01/02/2012
Contributor: Cherrylane Cherrylane
It doesn't bother me to see boobies when they're feeding children.

Does it bother you when national geographic doesn't censor tits?

A breastfeeding mother is not sexually explicit. Saying it's inappropriate to show tit while breastfeeding is the epitome of objectification and sexualization of women. It's disgraceful.

And really, riddle me this. Why can men go around just about anywhere shirtless, eh? And a breastfeeding woman who doesn't cover her tit while feeding her child is wildly inappropriate? Give me a break.
01/02/2012
Contributor: badk1tty badk1tty
(I would also like to add, as an addendum, that I am aware there is a lot of sarcasm behind this post -- it's the general -attitude- that pisses me off, not the article.)
01/02/2012
Contributor: aliceinthehole aliceinthehole
Quote:
Originally posted by badk1tty
(I would also like to add, as an addendum, that I am aware there is a lot of sarcasm behind this post -- it's the general -attitude- that pisses me off, not the article.)
both turned me off. i wasn't downright pissed because i've just seen too much of this.

let me say this, however... in europe this is not an issue. italian commercials for nursing pads for the bra show the baby suckling. on television. on a commercial.


why? because the breast is not oversexualized as it is here.


i mean for shit's sake. this is the kind of censorship that eventually snowballed into those of other culture's requiring their women to cover their entire bodies save their freaking eyeballs because the rest was 'unclean, impure, immoral, too sexual.'

those who can't handle the sight of a baby feeding need to grow up.
01/03/2012
Contributor: aliceinthehole aliceinthehole
Quote:
Originally posted by Cherrylane
It doesn't bother me to see boobies when they're feeding children.

Does it bother you when national geographic doesn't censor tits?

A breastfeeding mother is not sexually explicit. Saying it's inappropriate to show tit ... more
"Why can men go around just about anywhere shirtless, eh? And a breastfeeding woman who doesn't cover her tit while feeding her child is wildly inappropriate? Give me a break. "


amen.
01/03/2012
Contributor: T&A1987 T&A1987
so it's the "should you bend to society, or should society bend to you" debate? I however have not studied this issue much, so i will not remark any more, other than pointing out that yes, there was a lot of snark in this article.
01/03/2012
Contributor: Hot 'N Sexy TexasMama Hot 'N Sexy TexasMama
I read the article - fully. I breastfed my twins for a very short time - but never did it in public.

Do I like seeing it done? Not really. But am I gonna be snarky about it?

Nope.

I wonder if a large number of breastfeeding women want to surround this woman's home and breastfeed!

Sorry - but her attitude just really sucked.

Grow up and get over it.

If I have to watch couples kiss and make out in public - and smell smoke and see people acting drunk...then whats wrong with a mom feeding her baby - especially since the mom who this was originally about - was in a CORNER of the store - not out in the front or middle aisle.
01/03/2012
Contributor: bayosgirl bayosgirl
Quote:
Originally posted by badk1tty
I gotta say, I disagree with just about everything in that article. Sure, you -can- use a cover. You -can- use a bathroom. You -can- stay home. But you should't have to.

Smokers offend me. I don't give every smoker I see nasty looks, ... more
This. 100%.
01/03/2012
Contributor: Love Perpetua Love Perpetua
Pretty sure this article is entirely sarcastic. Although there are probably people who actually do feel that way, the author isn't one of them.

I have no idea why people think that their discomfort about possibly glancing at a slightly exposed breast would trump a mother's right to feed her baby. I also don't really understand how breastfeeding in public can be compared to smoking in public. One is the natural and healthy way to feed a baby, the other is an unhealthy personal habit which negatively affects the health of those exposed to it. I think we forget that the actual purpose of breasts is to feed a baby - all mammals have them, that is how they all feed our young. I have no problem with breasts being sexual, but they are sexual in additionto their other, very important purpose.
01/03/2012
Contributor: AndroAngel AndroAngel
The article is parody. That said, I find seeing breast feeding in public mildly uncomfortable in a personal sense, but no more than watching anyone else eat messily and/or strangely. "Nurse-ins" on the other hand personally bother me, it's no better than having a massive friggin picnic where everyone else is trying to shop because one person said something stupid. And it seems like it would put the babies at risk if someone got fed up and decided to be stupid. Breast feeding should be done where it's acceptable to eat, I don't want to have my lunch in Automotive at Walmart, neither should a baby.
01/03/2012
Contributor: Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
The article is a satire (as verified by the author, Bunmi Laditan, in the comment section).

Bunmi says:
December 31, 2011 at 9:34 am
Satire.

Bunmi says:
January 2, 2012 at 3:49 pm
One might want to consider that it is selfish of people who have issues with female chest flesh (men seem to be OK with going toplesss) to demand women cover up. It’s selfish of you to not turn your head if you are offended. The needs of an infant outweigh your need to feel comfortable. The need for a woman to be able to feed her child without feeling as if she needs to hide under a tarp outweigh your feelings of uncomfortable arousal or nervousness.
It’s not a woman’s job to make men feel comfortable when she is caring for her infant and juggling life. It is selfish of people to ask others to conform to their level of modesty.
PS. I was very uncomfortable with the clothes you had on today. Tomorrow, please wear something different. See how ridiculous that sounds?
Adults need to learn to deal with their discomfort. It is not one’s job to morally police others.

Bunmi says:
January 2, 2012 at 4:19 pm
Thanks Brittany. I find the whole conversation bizarre. A brief glance at American history takes us to times when showing knees and shoulders was considered risque. Where women who showed knees behaving inappropriately? No. They were going against the social norm of the time.
Nursing women who find it difficult or ridiculous to have to go through lengths to “cover up” a part of the body that has been oversexualized to the point of lunacy are not being inappropriate. They are taking care of their children.
It takes a lot of nerve for an individual to impose their standard of modest- whether it’s knees, elbows, shoulders or breasts on someone else. Especially when the action being taken is as vital to a healthy life as breastfeeding.
Be uncomfortable for 2.5 seconds and then use your neck muscles to turn your head. That’s what I do when I see leggings worn as pants. I turn my head. Because my feelings are not law and they do not bind anyone. They’re my feelngs- a set of acquired judgements based on my culture, upbringing, and interpretation of life. They’re not all that important.



Jonathon Swift didn't SERIOUSLY suggest for the Irish to sell their children as food for the rich when he wrote A Modest Proposal. Instead, he was mocking heartless attitudes toward the poor. His work provided some much-needed shock value to a callous society.

The author feels exactly the same way as all of you feel. Her article is written to mock the viewpoints of those who oppose breastfeeding in public and to show just how ridiculous their suggestions are.
01/03/2012
Contributor: LilLostLenore LilLostLenore
would you rather the child starve and scream bloody murder cause hes fucking hungry? Give it the damn boobie.
01/03/2012
Contributor: Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
I think the comment I cut and pasted below was the best comment under that article:

Rachel says:
January 2, 2012 at 10:40 pm
If breastfeeding is sexual, then bottles are dildos

01/03/2012
Contributor: shcoo shcoo
Quote:
Originally posted by LilLostLenore
would you rather the child starve and scream bloody murder cause hes fucking hungry? Give it the damn boobie.
^ lol

I think women should be allowed to be topless in public. I think genitals are a different story and should be covered, but I hate the double standard of guys being able to be topless while women can't.
01/03/2012
Contributor: Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
I liked this comment, too:

BerkshireMom says:
January 2, 2012 at 2:24 pm
Ladies, from now on when you go out to eat in a restaurant, be sure to bring an extra blanket, large. When someone tells you to cover up, smile and say “Sure thing! And here’s a blanket for YOU to eat YOUR meal under. Since YOU will be eating covered up, and won’t be able to see us, I am sure we won’t offend you. Therefore, it won’t be necessary for US to be covered. Bon Appetit!”

And here's another lovely comment by the author of the article expounding on her pro-breastfeeding views:

Bunmi says:
January 2, 2012 at 5:01 pm
Ellen, thank you for sharing. I’ve heard about this “in your face” attitude but have never seen it. Has anyone actually seen a mom wagging her breasts around in an attempt to make people feel deliberately uncomfortable? Even if there are women like this, I feel as if they have little to do with mainstream breastfeeding and the emotional hits women take when attempting to do so in public.
Public breastfeeding is probably the best thing that can happen to teens. Both boys and girls. To see the female body, especially the breasts, reframed and pulled back from the marketing industry to their originally and beautiful purpose would be a wonderful thing.
What better way to combat the objectification of the female body than to highlight it’s fantastic “mechanisms” (for lack of a better word). What if girls treasured their bodies and their breasts because of their unique function rather than the shape and size compared to that of Kim Kardashians.
Breasts are not intrinsically sexual. They are an erogenous zone, yes, but for many, so are earlobes. And necks. Modesty is extremely relative. Demanding women cover up only serves to sexualize breasts even more by making them a taboo. This hurts breastfeeding as many women are too ashamed to nurse in public, many babies will not nurse covered and therefore many of these women, who want to lead normal public lives, naturally choose bottles as part of a modest lifestyle.
Many women also choose bottles because they find breastfeeding “gross.”
We need to help women and men see breasts as both beautiful, erogenous, and intended for the nourishment of children simultaneously.
I’ll say it again, modesty is relative and learned. For those who assert modest from a religious point of voice- the Bible actually talks about women covering their hair as a form of modesty. I’ve never read anything pertaining to breasts. Correct me if I’m wrong.
But even if it did, to make someone else responsible for ensuring your sense of comfort is wrong and silly. Live your life and let others live theirs.
01/03/2012
Contributor: InnocentISwear InnocentISwear
Awesome article. I love satire.
01/03/2012
Contributor: InnocentISwear InnocentISwear
“During the summer months, place two little straws in your baby’s nose scuba-style so that cool air can be retrieved without making us all barf from the sight of your boob flesh.”


I keep laughing at the image I get of this.
01/03/2012
Contributor: spiceboy spiceboy
I think most everyone who looked at the article could see the humor in it. What's unclear is what the original poster meant by linking to it! Is that wink supposed to be a clue? The satire in the original post is much less clear than the satire in the article.
01/03/2012
Contributor: Errant Venture Errant Venture
I was chuckling to myself all the while I read that article, and then I reached the comment section and then started scratching my head, wondering if people were serious in that they became irate at the author (for supposedly being anti-breast), or were carrying on the sarcastic element.

Anyway, yeah, I'm all for it. Both breastfeeding, and sarcasm
01/03/2012
Contributor: Peggi Peggi
Quote:
Originally posted by Errant Venture
I was chuckling to myself all the while I read that article, and then I reached the comment section and then started scratching my head, wondering if people were serious in that they became irate at the author (for supposedly being anti-breast), or ... more
I agree! The article had me rolling on the floor, the comments just really pushed me over the edge I thought I was going to die laughing so hard I couldn't breathe lol
01/03/2012
Contributor: TheSlyFox TheSlyFox
Quote:
Originally posted by Cherrylane
It doesn't bother me to see boobies when they're feeding children.

Does it bother you when national geographic doesn't censor tits?

A breastfeeding mother is not sexually explicit. Saying it's inappropriate to show tit ... more
^This.
01/03/2012
Contributor: Beck Beck
Quote:
Originally posted by Peggi
I feel that every mother should read this article. Fully. No really, before you comment about it, make sure you read all of it

This article is a life-saver because aren't we ALL sick and tired of seeing boobies out in the open just ... more
Breastfeeding must not be that popular in my area, I have only ever seen it once and the lady was wearing a blanket over her shoulder. I do have to say that if there was someone standing there next to me at the store breastfeeding their child I would feel uncomfortable, but mainly due to the fact that I would be trying so hard not to look that I would look.

I breastfeed both of my boys, but never in public. I was never comfortable at all doing so and would even get up and go out to the car to breastfeed. I like when the bathrooms have the lounge room, which is a nice place to go breastfeed, I did not want some random person staring at me while I am breastfeeding.
01/03/2012
Contributor: unfulfilled unfulfilled
I breastfed both my boys, but if I was going out in public I would pump (excpress my milk) beforehand so if they got hungry they would have a bottle to eat from. However, a mother's body knows when its time for their child to eat so they will start leaking milk so I had to make sure I had breast pads in or I'd end up with a wet shirt.
01/03/2012
Contributor: badk1tty badk1tty
I found it to be fairly obvious that it was satire in the thread that was linked. I also am assuming that Peggi is pro-breastfeeding, what with her having so many friends that do it, as she states.

My anger is not directed towards either, but towards the idiots who make these articles necessary.
01/03/2012
Contributor: averageguyextrodinarypleasure averageguyextrodinarypleasure
Um #6? A sexual act with your child? I think that was poorly worded
01/03/2012