The New Intimacy

How many times have you had to completely start over in your life?

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Contributor: js250 js250
There are many reasons people make a 'fresh start' in their life. However-- when a person is forced by circumstances out of their control and have no choice but to completely start over in their life...that is seldom discussed.

--Have you had to start over?
--How many times?
--Share your experiences, what happened and how you feel now, please. (Only if you are comfortable sharing!)
03/31/2014
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Contributor: wrecklesswords wrecklesswords
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
There are many reasons people make a 'fresh start' in their life. However-- when a person is forced by circumstances out of their control and have no choice but to completely start over in their life...that is seldom discussed.

--Have ... more
I have had to start over twice in my life, and I suppose right now I am undergoing the third time.

The first time, I had been fired from my first job, the man that I was in love with and having an affair with moved back to his home state, I had no more friends, no car, no job, and was utterly depressed. I had to move from Texas to Nebraska to start over with my parents. 11 months later I was able to move back to Texas and things went swimmingly. Then I moved from north Texas to the Houston area... and then when that relationship ended, I had to start over once more by moving back with my parents in Nebraska.

That redo was wonderful. I got a full-time job and then met someone who became a good friend at first, and then he was the most loving, supportive, and upbeat person I'd ever dated. He loved me so much, showed it every chance he got, and remembered all the little things that I even forgot about myself. And then two weeks ago, he ripped that world out from under me with sorry excuses for how his job keeps him too busy and he can't "give me what I deserve".

So, I suppose... in a sense, I am starting over again, only this time without a big move.
03/31/2014
Contributor: SaucyxGirl SaucyxGirl
I left my parents house when I was 18/19. I had roughly around $300 in the bank, no job due to parental interference and was not really sure when I was going to be staying. At the exact same time my boyfriend of 4 years dumped me cold, the vast majority of my friends turned their backs of me (parents were spreading lies about me-long story)

I pretty much started with nothing and lucked out that a close dear friend took me in and allowed me to stay with him-no strings attached until I could get shit together. The hardest part was building up support system around me to help me during those times. I mean I was still a kid so to speak and pretty much on my own so I knew I needed guidance.

It wasn't easy, but I managed.
03/31/2014
Contributor: BlackHippieChick Reviews BlackHippieChick Reviews
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
There are many reasons people make a 'fresh start' in their life. However-- when a person is forced by circumstances out of their control and have no choice but to completely start over in their life...that is seldom discussed.

--Have ... more
I basically began looking after myself at 16, when I was 17, I developed Multiple Sclerosis and had to return to my parents as a quadriplegic. At that time, I had to learn how to walk, feed myself & write all over again....I am currently in the process of starting all over. I am in the process of divorcing the man I've been with since I was 19. It's kind of scary but, it is also very rewarding. I am finally learning that it's okay to be whomever I choose! I have the right to be happy, appreciated & loved, and I must say I love it!
03/31/2014
Contributor: Pete's Princess Pete's Princess
(Review Program Mentor)
Well I was with my ex for 18 years. Knew I should't have married him but guilt/insecurity and some other issues played into it. I worked all the time to get away from his verbal abuse. I had gained a lot of weight due to the depression of being with him. I lost 60 lbs and gained my confidence again. When I was in process of leaving him, I reconnected with my HS boyfriend. We got together. My ex threatened to kill me and my dog, stalked me, had other people harass me and basically made my life a nightmare once I left. I had a horrible lawyer and got completely shafted because he pretended to be disabled and had the court convinced I had left him for someone else. He had the court believing all his lies. I had been laid off from my job and was unable to find another. He convinced the court that I was purposefully not getting a job. I was receiving food stamps and the court awarded HIM $1500 a month in alimony for 5 years. Yes - you read it right. I had a restraining order against the louse but I guess NC feels women should stay in abusive relationships or they will have to pay. The court also gave him 80% of the joint assets. The court even gave him the clothes I left in the house when I had to move out of state due to the stalking. So I basically lost everything I had worked for.

I am having to start over. I had to declare bankruptcy and have no assets. I haven't been able to afford to pay him any alimony so that continues to rack up. But I still thank God each and every day that I am not with that man. My life is so much better without him. I have a man who loves me and that I want to come home to. I would rather live in the street than go back to my ex.
03/31/2014
Contributor: PadoruLover PadoruLover
I've only started over once and since I had my family around it wasn't to bad. Just finding a job was a little tough but when I did it actually worked out great.
03/31/2014
Contributor: wrecklesswords wrecklesswords
Quote:
Originally posted by BlackHippieChick Reviews
I basically began looking after myself at 16, when I was 17, I developed Multiple Sclerosis and had to return to my parents as a quadriplegic. At that time, I had to learn how to walk, feed myself & write all over again....I am currently in the ... more
Well, I'd say that's a great and positive outlook on this and I have faith that you will be able to start over feeling better than ever!
04/01/2014
Contributor: edeneve edeneve
quite a few times. contact me & I'll share the details.
04/03/2014
Contributor: indiechick indiechick
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
There are many reasons people make a 'fresh start' in their life. However-- when a person is forced by circumstances out of their control and have no choice but to completely start over in their life...that is seldom discussed.

--Have ... more
I have moved more than 1000 miles over 5 times in 5 years.
04/03/2014
Contributor: Snozzberries Snozzberries
I'm just starting over now. My husband died last year. Now, my two boys and I are moving to another state, to a new house, to live a new life that's safer and more secure for all of us. We're getting out of the big city and building a farm for our future.
04/03/2014
Contributor: RomanticGoth RomanticGoth
I'm starting over again... i've lost count of how many times its been now. I met my soulmate and moved in with him, to yet another new state. I've been bouncing around since joining EF. The last few people i've been with have been mentally and/or physically abusive which made my depression worse and caused me to gain weight.

I'm trying to build up confidence again and lose this weight. Its been really hard, because I have body image issues and have to deal with harassment at work on top of depression and anxiety.
04/08/2014
Contributor: wrecklesswords wrecklesswords
Quote:
Originally posted by RomanticGoth
I'm starting over again... i've lost count of how many times its been now. I met my soulmate and moved in with him, to yet another new state. I've been bouncing around since joining EF. The last few people i've been with have been ... more
I bet you are an amazing person and I have faith that you will be able to accomplish what you put yourself to. I'm so sorry that you are experiencing harrassment at work, that is not professional or humane.

I believe in you!
04/09/2014