The New Intimacy

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Contributor: Carrie Ann Carrie Ann
Related to: 
As Different as the Next Girl
Really. Wow. I'm SUPER impressed with this article. Sometimes, being around sex and sexuality talk and sex toys and a sex blog all day, every day, leaves me thinking I know everything. This article reminded me that I don't. And that things and people and terms change fluidly, shifting to suit people at different times in their lives.

Mad kudos to Tobi for the phenomenal advice and look into the world of trans women.
07/31/2009
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Contributor: Not Here Anymore f/k/a Happy Lady Not Here Anymore f/k/a Happy Lady
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
Really. Wow. I'm SUPER impressed with this article. Sometimes, being around sex and sexuality talk and sex toys and a sex blog all day, every day, leaves me thinking I know everything. This article reminded me that I don't. And that ... more
*applauds*

Thank you Tobi. This article is amazing.
07/31/2009
Contributor: gone77 gone77
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
Really. Wow. I'm SUPER impressed with this article. Sometimes, being around sex and sexuality talk and sex toys and a sex blog all day, every day, leaves me thinking I know everything. This article reminded me that I don't. And that ... more
Let me third those kudos to Tobi. It just reinforces my belief that communication is the biggest key to the success of every relationship regardless of how the individuals identify themselves.
07/31/2009
Contributor: Backseat Boohoo Backseat Boohoo
I am all for more trans-related articles. This one was a phenomenal addition to Sexis.
07/31/2009
Contributor: Adriana Ravenlust Adriana Ravenlust
I also agree it took on the issue very well. I know that I am not alone in being (sometimes frustratingly) ignorant on the subject. For those of us who aren't, finding helpful information can prove to be quite difficult.
07/31/2009
Contributor: Sammi Sammi
This was a good article!
07/31/2009
Contributor: Oggins Oggins
I just read this and I'm all like, "Wow" too! Fantastic article and I'd love to see more like it!
07/31/2009
Contributor: imp imp
That was wonderful and educating. It's a brilliant article and I echo Naughty Eliot and am a strong believer in communication being imperative to healthy relationships. Thank you for sharing.
08/01/2009
Contributor: Liz Liz
I felt this article presented a lot of important information on a little-discussed topic with great intelligence and sensitivity. Thank you Tobi for the reminder that I too have a lot to learn.
08/01/2009
Contributor: Tobi Tobi
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
Really. Wow. I'm SUPER impressed with this article. Sometimes, being around sex and sexuality talk and sex toys and a sex blog all day, every day, leaves me thinking I know everything. This article reminded me that I don't. And that ... more
Wow, glad to be so appreciated and welcomed into this space. I'll keep it up and be writing more articles that are hopefully just as appreciated. The one I'm working on right now is an interview with a feminist porn director.
08/02/2009
Contributor: Tobi Tobi
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
Really. Wow. I'm SUPER impressed with this article. Sometimes, being around sex and sexuality talk and sex toys and a sex blog all day, every day, leaves me thinking I know everything. This article reminded me that I don't. And that ... more
Wow, glad to be so appreciated and welcomed into this space. I'll keep it up and be writing more articles that are hopefully just as appreciated. The one I'm working on right now is an interview with a feminist porn director.
08/02/2009
Contributor: TinyTease TinyTease
Wonderful! This really reinforces that every relationship requires communication and care.
08/04/2009
Contributor: Sir Sir
She words it a bit confusing, but it's an alright article. She seems as if she's saying that transwomen are only lesbians, since that's all that she includes in her verbage.
08/05/2009
Contributor: Tobi Tobi
Quote:
Originally posted by Sir
She words it a bit confusing, but it's an alright article. She seems as if she's saying that transwomen are only lesbians, since that's all that she includes in her verbage.
I was sure not to make a gendered reference to the reader or any other people trans women might potentially be hooking up with specifically to be inclusive of a wide range of genders that trans women might be sexual with. You might be noticing that I consistently used female pronouns for the hypothetical person the reader might be sexual with because in this context it is framed as advice for a reader of any gender on being sexual with trans women rather than advice directed at trans women.

Incidentally, I tossed in one or two anecdotes of my experience with cis women and genderqueers but could not think of any relevant anecdotes from my experience with men (trans or cis). But that's more of a reflection of my experience then a statement on other trans women.
08/11/2009
Contributor: deceased deceased
link


You want wow? The phenomena of afaafine of Samoa is a wow thing. Here, women play important enough roles in society that if there are not enough women in the family, a male will be raised as a woman. ANd totally accepted as a real , hwterosexual woman without altering hormones or mutilating genetailia. You just believe, and so does the rest of society.
02/26/2010
Contributor: hjtee hjtee
What a great article! Sexis does a great job of trans issues.
04/03/2011
Contributor: tiname25 tiname25
sexis is the best
05/08/2011
Contributor: hotcoktail hotcoktail
I agree with you tiname45
05/08/2011
Contributor: yatinp30 yatinp30
hmm
05/08/2011
Contributor: Stinkytofu10 Stinkytofu10
great article, opened my mind. Thanks for sharing!
01/27/2012
Contributor: Jensen Jensen
And this is why I love this place SO MUCH.
I am amazed at how the community just opens up to everybody and there's no exclusion or drama and how there's SO MUCH INFORMATION on EVERYTHING.
02/06/2012
Contributor: x203 x203
That article was great. Thank you !
09/02/2012
Contributor: adam71 adam71
great article
10/08/2012