The New Intimacy

Trans AND genderqueer?

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Contributor: Genderfree Genderfree
I met an awesome girl about a week ago who was not only a trans woman, she was also genderqueer. Which means, basically, she is on hormones, and she goes by female pronouns (and gender neutral if you wish) but she also goes beyond those gender boundaries. Some days she'll dress really feminine, but the next day be wearing purely essentials!

I just thought it was such a breath of fresh air because I know so many trans people that seem to try to fit so hard into their gender (physically, emotionally and socially) and seeing someone who just is themselves and doesn't worry if people read them as male or female is really beautiful to me. I'm not saying a lot of people don't fit perfectly in their gender; hey, I get it!

It just made me also sort of think about myself! My gender is always changing quite a bit and I do have a feminine side! As in, not only wearing panties and stockings sometimes, but really embracing my female body in a way that makes myself feel comfortable as a man. Does that make sense?
02/03/2013
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Contributor: GONE! GONE!
It totally makes sense. I, too, identify as trans but also genderqueer. The way I see it, just because I want my body to match what most people see as a binary sex doesn't mean my mind completely matches that either. It's just my preferred setting.
02/03/2013
Contributor: tiniest bird tiniest bird
Quote:
Originally posted by Genderfree
I met an awesome girl about a week ago who was not only a trans woman, she was also genderqueer. Which means, basically, she is on hormones, and she goes by female pronouns (and gender neutral if you wish) but she also goes beyond those gender ... more
It definitely makes sense to me. I really wish there was less pressure on us to confirm so rigidly to gender roles, especially if we want to transition. I think it leaves a lot of us feeling like we're not trans enough.
02/14/2013
Contributor: charletnarouh charletnarouh
Quote:
Originally posted by tiniest bird
It definitely makes sense to me. I really wish there was less pressure on us to confirm so rigidly to gender roles, especially if we want to transition. I think it leaves a lot of us feeling like we're not trans enough.
This is a really interesting point that I've really never thought of. Thank you for sharing. I think the idea of just being yourself and whatever expression makes you feel most comfortable is really beautiful. Gender roles are far too confining and rigid in our society.
02/14/2013
Contributor: Lucifer the Cat Lucifer the Cat
That's sort of similar to how I identify! As a nonbinary trans* person, I get all sorts of weird shit from people in both cis and trans communities.
02/15/2013
Contributor: Rivers Rivers
Personally, I identify strictly as a transman- that is, as a man. However, I can see myself sliding into a more gender-neutral role once I have transitioned to my satisfaction. All I know is that to be comfortable with anything, I have to at least have a foothold in being visibly male.

However, I would like to point out that as a straight-up transman, I do wear effeminate things. Denying gender roles and being genderqueer is not necessarily the same thing.

(But you do whatever you do, and you be happy doing it. All the best.)
03/12/2013
Contributor: Twelve Twelve
Quote:
Originally posted by Rivers
Personally, I identify strictly as a transman- that is, as a man. However, I can see myself sliding into a more gender-neutral role once I have transitioned to my satisfaction. All I know is that to be comfortable with anything, I have to at least ... more
See, similarly, I don't feel I'd be fully comfortable wearing effeminate things until I presented effectively as male, though that's probably just early transition anxieties. c:
03/12/2013
Contributor: ihavemagicpants ihavemagicpants
i find myself kind of in ways genderqueer but i am definately a transman. so i am not sure where i would fall in genderqueerness cause i am transmale, taking hormones and removing my chest but not the bottom half. i just see myself as myself and try not to pinpoint it. it doesn't make me upset about half the time when people call me ma'am but i know it is because i have a EE chest
03/28/2013