I don't think I have ever posted in a forum before, but I am feeling a little out of my depth and could use some feedback from people that have been there. I have been with my boyfriend (ftm) for almost 3 months now( I identify as a stright gal). He is incredible, the connection we share is unlike anything I have ever had. I want our relationship to work in the longterm and I think that it deffinetly will but I could use some help navigating some early speed bumps. In other peoples experiences did you share with your family and friends? What were their reactions? Was/is sex a challenge? Do you feel like you miss traditional straight sex? I am so in love, but I feel like it would be great to hear about other peoples experiences with some of these things so that I have a better idea what to expect. thanks
Looking for support...
02/04/2013
- 1
- 2
- 3
- 4
- 5
In my experience, sharing what's in another person's pants is a pretty big no-no. My current partner and I had SOME people who knew, but we kept that to a minimum. ONLY people who knew me before I transitioned know that I am trans. Other people knowing absolutely will not help and can cause huge, very big problems later on the line.
Reactions can range from confusion, to disbelief, to aggression and outright hostility to the person who is trans, and even the other person for accepting them! Yes there are sometimes good reactions but those tend to be so much fewer No reason to risk it. If you think some people need to know, ask your boyfriend. He should be the one who decides who does and does not get HIS personal information, just like you should be the one to decide about yours.
And sex isn't a challenge for my partner and I, and never was. He kept his paws off parts I didn't want touched (my chest before surgery) and we use our bodies (genitals, hands, mouths) as well as sex toys.
I don't miss 'traditional' sex, but I am a gay trans man with a cisgender male partner, so we have all the 'supplies' that one might assume we'd need during traditional sex.
Even saying that, we use a LOT of foreplay and toys, so there are plenty of options out there. If you love each other definitely give it a try!
Reactions can range from confusion, to disbelief, to aggression and outright hostility to the person who is trans, and even the other person for accepting them! Yes there are sometimes good reactions but those tend to be so much fewer No reason to risk it. If you think some people need to know, ask your boyfriend. He should be the one who decides who does and does not get HIS personal information, just like you should be the one to decide about yours.
And sex isn't a challenge for my partner and I, and never was. He kept his paws off parts I didn't want touched (my chest before surgery) and we use our bodies (genitals, hands, mouths) as well as sex toys.
I don't miss 'traditional' sex, but I am a gay trans man with a cisgender male partner, so we have all the 'supplies' that one might assume we'd need during traditional sex.
Even saying that, we use a LOT of foreplay and toys, so there are plenty of options out there. If you love each other definitely give it a try!
02/07/2013
Total posts: 2
Unique posters: 2