The New Intimacy

How have people reacted to you coming out to them as transgender?

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Contributor: MasonM MasonM
I've been coming out to people slowly and getting mixed reactions. Some are taking it very well, others have questions and several have said 'Things make more sense now!' or 'I already knew.'.

So what have your experiences been?
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Well, but had questions.
14
Well, with no questions.
7
Well, with 'It makes sense now!'.
7
Well, with 'I already knew.'
8
Poorly, but had questions.
4
Poorly, but with no questions.
3
Poorly, with grudging acceptance.
1
Poorly, with abusive language.
4
Poorly, with ignoring what you've told them.
12
Total votes: 60 (22 voters)
Poll is closed
04/22/2012
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Contributor: eroticmutt eroticmutt
Most of the people who knew me personally were not surprised/already suspected. A few of them had terribly phrased questions but were reluctantly accepting and not mean or cruel.
04/22/2012
Contributor: Willowe Willowe
It depends on who I was coming out to. All of my friends so far I have been completely accepting. Most have had questions, and if they were mean or offensive it certainly wasn't intentionally. My family is a completely different story however, and let's just say that after my mom's reaction I'm not going to be telling any other family members for awhile...
04/22/2012
Contributor: MasonM MasonM
Quote:
Originally posted by Willowe
It depends on who I was coming out to. All of my friends so far I have been completely accepting. Most have had questions, and if they were mean or offensive it certainly wasn't intentionally. My family is a completely different story however, ... more
Most of my friends that I've told have had the 'It makes sense' response...but I'm terrified to tell my family members, mostly because I've heard they tend to take it much more harshly.
04/23/2012
Contributor: butts butts
Most of my friends have been wonderfully supportive, most have questions but nothing ignorant or offensive, mostly just curiosity and a lack of experience with transfolk! My parents on the other hand, were absolutely awful! haha
05/01/2012
Contributor: Youssii Youssii
Quote:
Originally posted by MasonM
I've been coming out to people slowly and getting mixed reactions. Some are taking it very well, others have questions and several have said 'Things make more sense now!' or 'I already knew.'.

So what have your experiences been?
I had one or two friends react badly, but my mother has definitely been the worst thus far - I came out to her last August, and she's yet to even accept I might be anything other than "confused".

I think what hurt the most was her saying it was because I must think I'm too fat or ugly to be a girl. I guess it just kind of hit at my self confidence, because I don't really think of myself as ugly (and neither do my partners so I guess I can't look too awful) except for when she constantly reinforces that idea within me.
05/01/2012
Contributor: MasonM MasonM
Quote:
Originally posted by Youssii
I had one or two friends react badly, but my mother has definitely been the worst thus far - I came out to her last August, and she's yet to even accept I might be anything other than "confused".

I think what hurt the most was ... more
It sounds to me like she's not wanting to admit to herself who you really are, so she's just looking for any reason to think something different.
05/02/2012
Contributor: Interesante Interesante
My friends seemed pretty fine with it. Very supportive.

My parents were a bit befuddled, and they had questions, but they were gery accepting. I haven't told anyone else.
05/02/2012
Contributor: Ly-Ra Ly-Ra
Most people thought I meant intersex... it was a bit awkward to explain after that. But generally it went well with a few questions here and there.
05/04/2012
Contributor: TakeHimAway TakeHimAway
Quote:
Originally posted by MasonM
I've been coming out to people slowly and getting mixed reactions. Some are taking it very well, others have questions and several have said 'Things make more sense now!' or 'I already knew.'.

So what have your experiences been?
Bad, and I don't think it's going to get better.
05/07/2012
Contributor: MasonM MasonM
Quote:
Originally posted by TakeHimAway
Bad, and I don't think it's going to get better.
I'm sorry and I hope that it does get better somehow.
05/07/2012
Contributor: Mwar Mwar
While not trans but a friend of a couple of friends who are transitioning: I do my best to understand and love them no matter what.

Hugs to all those who'll have them
05/07/2012
Contributor: MistressDandelion MistressDandelion
For now I've only told one friend, that thought it was like being a tomboy and kind of related, reacted well but no questions and ignoring my chosen pronounds.. In highschool, all my male friends used proper pronouns.... I miss that time.
05/07/2012
Contributor: MistressDandelion MistressDandelion
Update: Actually we talked a bit about it today and she said I was being ridiculous wanting to be called with male pronouns.
05/09/2012