The New Intimacy

When asked about your sexuality, what do you say?

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Contributor: needapacker needapacker
A lot of the bisexuals I know usually don't say they're bisexual when asked. Like when i'm asked, i just say I'm gay since im in a committed relationship with a man.
What do you say and why?
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Bisexual
49
Gay/lesbian
17
Straight
34
Other
45
It depends
24
Total votes: 169 (140 voters)
Poll is closed
12/21/2012
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Contributor: kdlt kdlt
I always say I'm "queer". It sums everything up nicely.
12/21/2012
Contributor: Intrepid Niddering Intrepid Niddering
I'm omnisexual, so when asked, I state that I'm omnisexual. If it's not asked, I don't say anything about my sexuality.

It actually bothers me when people who are bi claim they are a different sexuality when they aren't with anyone. The ex's ex kept trying to plan these weekend trips with him when he and I were together. He told me I needed to stop being upset by that because, "She's dating this one girl. She's a lesbian now." It doesn't work like that. Your sexuality doesn't just flip because of the gender of your partner.
12/21/2012
Contributor: sXeVegan90 sXeVegan90
I've always said bisexual.
12/21/2012
Contributor: bog bog
Quote:
Originally posted by kdlt
I always say I'm "queer". It sums everything up nicely.
I'm with you, kadalette! I just say "I'm queer" no matter who my partner(s) are.
12/21/2012
Contributor: Gracie Gracie
I'm straight so I'm not sure if you meant for me to respond or not. But I wanted to say for me I find this a very personal question and I don't recall ever being asked.
12/22/2012
Contributor: talon4196 talon4196
I'm never asked, really.
12/22/2012
Contributor: KinkyNicki92 KinkyNicki92
Im rarely asked but I prefer bicurious. I like girls but i dont classify as bisexual since im not interested in dating one or being with one sexually for that matter
12/22/2012
Contributor: hanjonatan hanjonatan
i say i'm bisexual. i'm in a committed relationship with a woman, so i don't, like, talk about being bisexual a lot or whatever, but if someone asks, i tell them. the last time it happened was at a cousin's wedding (my gf didn't come with me), and everyone was surprised because they just assumed i was gay, hah.
12/26/2012
Contributor: edeneve edeneve
I'm straight. I never get asked that question, though.
12/26/2012
Contributor: TheirPet TheirPet
I always tell people I'm pansexual and to keep me out of their kitchens.
12/26/2012
Contributor: Beck Beck
I say Pansexual now. It use to be bisexual. Pansexual fits me best, but really....I find all labels a bit annoying. I like what I like and don't need to title it.
12/26/2012
Contributor: chernayavdova chernayavdova
Quote:
Originally posted by Beck
I say Pansexual now. It use to be bisexual. Pansexual fits me best, but really....I find all labels a bit annoying. I like what I like and don't need to title it.
I'm the same way, though I just went with "fluid" since it seems to suit me a little better. Nothing ever quite fits and it's just not that important to me to be one thing or another. I think it's great if someone finds a label that works for them, but it just isn't important to me personally.
12/26/2012
Contributor: tortilla tortilla
hetero
12/26/2012
Contributor: PDXlady PDXlady
I usually go with bisexual but occasionally queer.
12/26/2012
Contributor: kitty1949 kitty1949
Bi or straight.
12/26/2012
Contributor: aluminummm aluminummm
I identify as queer.
12/27/2012
Contributor: sillylilkitten sillylilkitten
I usually go with heteroflexible. I'm interested in all genders sexually, but I only like guys romantically. If I don't want to sound pretentious I'll just say mostly straight.
12/27/2012
Contributor: Lildrummrgurl7 Lildrummrgurl7
It depends on who asks. I generally say straight since I am in a long term committed relationship with a male but I would prefer to label myself as heteroflexible. Not everyone understands the slight differences between labels though.
12/27/2012
Contributor: MaeGal MaeGal
I usually say I'm bisexual, but being in a heterosexual relationship at the moment a lot of people just assume I'm straight.
12/27/2012
Contributor: So Long Ya Doofuses! So Long Ya Doofuses!
Quote:
Originally posted by sillylilkitten
I usually go with heteroflexible. I'm interested in all genders sexually, but I only like guys romantically. If I don't want to sound pretentious I'll just say mostly straight.
I'm almost the exact opposite of you! I am romantically interested in all genders, yet I'm only sexually interested in guys. So for the most part I say I'm heterosexual, since I am a woman who is sexually attracted to men. If someone asks me to elaborate, though, I tell them I'm a panromantic heterosexual.
12/28/2012
Contributor: talkless talkless
It depends on the company
12/28/2012
Contributor: WhoopieDoo WhoopieDoo
I say I'm queer.
12/28/2012
Contributor: Creepellah Creepellah
if im asked I say im able to love anyone.
12/28/2012
Contributor: Cat E. Cat E.
I'm hetero and have never been asked.
12/30/2012
Contributor: Septimus Septimus
I generally identify as bisexual, but that doesn't mean that I'm going to tell that to everyone who asks.
I think I've only been flat out asked twice. Once I told the truth because the question was asked in a friendly manner and she was a friend of mine.
The second time I didn't because it was none of their business. It just depends.
12/30/2012
Contributor: fizzygato fizzygato
It depends.

If I don't know them/ don't care to know them/ similar situations where I basically don't feel like talking, I'll say, "I'm pansexual. I like everything."

If I'm somewhere where I feel like sexuality/identity politics is understood in a critical way and don't feel like talking, I'll probably say, "Queer."

If I'm writing an essay or really want to explain myself well to someone/ am up for it, I'll give them a very lengthy rant about my wrestling with mesophilia, graysexuality, autosexuality, demisexuality, lesbianism, queerness, and pomosexuality. And my difficulties with romance--- considering identifying as aromatic, demiromantic, panromantic, despite whatever contradictions that may imply.
12/30/2012
Contributor: invisiblehat invisiblehat
I tell them I don't know.
12/30/2012
Contributor: Jenyana Jenyana
I'm actually pansexual, but say I'm bisexual because it's easier for people to understand. If they seem interested and we have the time and opportunity, then I clarify.
12/31/2012
Contributor: butts butts
Gay, but I usually have to explain the transsexual part first haha! REALLY I'm homoflexible, but I don't care to be that specific unless it's the topic of the conversation. I definitely wouldn't call myself bisexual, pansexual or anything else, I think homoflexible suits me best since I'm only interested in "women" in very specific circumstances.
12/31/2012