The New Intimacy

Pets and Toys

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Contributor: ~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
I know there are often discussions about pets disrupting sex...but do they ever get a hold of your toys? How about your small children?

I would imagine that a dog might be attracted to recently used dildos...they look and probably smell delicious as they might resemble chew toys!

I'd love to hear some hilarious stories to brighten up my dreadful day of writing research papers!
12/15/2010
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Contributor: Alicia Alicia
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
I know there are often discussions about pets disrupting sex...but do they ever get a hold of your toys? How about your small children?

I would imagine that a dog might be attracted to recently used dildos...they look and probably smell ... more
My dog hasn't gotten a hold of everything, but my parents' dog has gotten a hold of theirs...sooo not cool to reach down to pick something up only to find it's a mangled and chewed up cock ring.

Actually wait, I just remembered that my dog DID once get a hold of my Evolved Bottle Rocket. I had it on my desk after reviewing it and she grabbed it off and I found it in her dog bed. Luckily she didn't bite too hard and there was only a slight dent in the plastic!

My daughter found a bullet a long time ago and started massaging her neck with it. I had to tell her those were massagers for adults only...and move my stash!

They also did see the Mystic Wand charging and wanted to try using that for a massage (they like to give shoulder and back massages), but I had to tell them no. I got them those little massagers with the four legs from Bed, Bath and Beyond and told them they can use THOSE to give massages!
12/15/2010
Contributor: Persephone's Addiction Persephone's Addiction
I keep mine hidden away so that my two Pekingese don't get ahold of them. That would be a sad day.

My sister-in-law, though, lost a vibrator because her toddler got ahold of it... She realized that he was being far too quiet and found him in the bedroom. He had "decorated" her vibrator with glittery nail polish, and it was turned on, vibrating around on the hardwood floor. LOL
12/15/2010
Contributor: PussyGalore PussyGalore
Never really been a problem, but I crack up when I hear about other stories. Especially if a pet drags it out while friends or family are over.
12/15/2010
Contributor: Coralbell Coralbell
I found my cat playing with my Emigi after I left it on my bedside table. She likes to get up there or onto my dresser and knock down pens or chapstick or anything else she can find. The Emigi looks like a cat toy though, so even if she took it downstairs and someone saw it I could just pretend that's what it is. Luckily she's too small to carry a dildo. Once she got a tampon out of my garbage which was gross and embarrassing.
12/15/2010
Contributor: Yoda Yoda
No pets have made off with our toys as of yet, but my God son got into our room one day while his Mom was visiting and got his hands on the vibrator on our bedside table. Thankfully I was able to grab it before he brought it our for show and tell.
12/15/2010
Contributor: firekitten firekitten
I once came home to my lab puppy having chewed up and destroyed my very first vibrator, and my roommate's fancy rabbit. Of course it was the roommate's fault for letting her out of her crate and leaving.
12/16/2010
Contributor: Shellz31 Shellz31
LMAO.
My cat isn't interested in toys - although if she was in a playful mood and found my feature tickler, she'd for sure have a munch on it.
Can just see it - feathers all mangled and gooed in cat spit...
12/16/2010
Contributor: BBW Talks Toys BBW Talks Toys
My eldest, last year (4 years old) found our bright blue anal beads and wanted to know what they were for. I was asleep and I woke up to her wagging them in my face. I just snatched them and tossed them behind the bed and told them they weren't for her.

My youngest (all while she was 2, she'll be 3 on Monday! GAH!) has been known to sneak into our room and turn on vibrators and even cracked the base of my Little Honey.

After doing the video review of my mini-double dong, I'd forgotten to take it back upstairs because I hid it on my desk. Well, I'm in the basement doing laundry and I hear My Mr. say "Go show that to your mother!" INSTANTLY I knew what she had in her hands.... BUT.... she comes to the door to the basement and has it flopping in front of her and says, "Look Mommy... Boingy Boingy Boingy!"

Oh yes, the life of a sex toy reviewer with children is often QUITE entertaining.
12/16/2010
Contributor: Envy Envy
Quote:
Originally posted by BBW Talks Toys
My eldest, last year (4 years old) found our bright blue anal beads and wanted to know what they were for. I was asleep and I woke up to her wagging them in my face. I just snatched them and tossed them behind the bed and told them they weren't ... more
Just think when they're teenagers and figure out what it all is, then go "EWWWW! I touched mom's stuff!"

I only have birds, but I'm smart enough to keep them away from any and all toys. Some of them LOVE to chew soft things, like paper and rubber, so it's not gonna happen!
12/16/2010
Contributor: *HisMrs* *HisMrs*
Quote:
Originally posted by Envy
Just think when they're teenagers and figure out what it all is, then go "EWWWW! I touched mom's stuff!"

I only have birds, but I'm smart enough to keep them away from any and all toys. Some of them LOVE to chew soft ... more
I know what you mean about the teenagers figuring out what it all was! In my case it was I that found out what my parents had! lol! For years my mom had this thing that she always kept in her nightstand. It was large and plugged in. One day I asked her what it was for and she said it was a massager for your back. Well it wasn't til I was 19 and looking around a sex toy shop that I realized she had the Hitachi. It hasn't changed much and I'm sure she might've used it for her back but then again I'm sure it wasn't just for back massages.. I was a little freaked out to say the least!

My cat hasn't showed interest in my toys but then again, I put them away ASAP.
01/10/2011
Contributor: lamira lamira
My cat has never been in contact with my toys. But even if she did, she wouldn't know what to do with it. She's not very playful.
01/10/2011
Contributor: Hot'n'Bothered Hot'n'Bothered
The dogs never gotten ahold of anything. Thank goodness!
01/10/2011
Contributor: liilii080 liilii080
Wow, I am so glad I don't have any horror stories to put here. The worst thing my dog got a hold of is dirty socks... embarrassing when company is over but not nearly as much as if she'd been dragging dildos around in front of the guests!
01/10/2011
Contributor: Beaners Beaners
The cats will occasionally bat around our toys. It's pretty funny. One time I walked into our room and there was a small vibrator in the middle of the floor and I said to my boyfriend, "Babe...what on earth were you doing?"
01/10/2011
Contributor: xgreatlovex xgreatlovex
no pet stories but i swear in college someone stole my red pocket rocket out of my room
01/12/2011
Contributor: MrRainybowbow MrRainybowbow
Well my dog has been known to make off with my dirty underwear =/
01/16/2011
Contributor: LavenderSkies LavenderSkies
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
I know there are often discussions about pets disrupting sex...but do they ever get a hold of your toys? How about your small children?

I would imagine that a dog might be attracted to recently used dildos...they look and probably smell ... more
Luckily they are not in reach of toys!
01/18/2011
Contributor: deletedacct deletedacct
I opened a package once and pulled out a silicone dildo from Tantus. My door was open and my boston terrier seen it. He jumped up to sniff it but i put it away in a drawer. Later that evening i caught him sniffing around that very same drawer while i was in another room, he wanted to play with it i'm guessing. lol.
01/18/2011
Contributor: kawigrl kawigrl
never stole toys but a few yrs ago while family was visiting my dog pushed over the laundry bin and pulled out a pair of underwear. I didn't realize until we were all siting around the tv relaxing. He went up to my uncle and literally stuck his head and the underwear in my uncles crouch trying to get attention. I was like omg he's chewing on a sock let me get that so sorry he's bothering you- thank god it was already torn and not really identifiable as underwear
01/18/2011
Contributor: Adriana Ravenlust Adriana Ravenlust
My cat clawed the shit out of my Sinfflut Intensity
01/18/2011
Contributor: IrishLassie IrishLassie
our animals are not allowed in the bedroom ever since both our cats on 2 seperate occasions clawed my husband's balls while we were in mid-sex. ^_^

actually just a couple of weeks a go, the hubs forgot to put one of our toys away and the dogs go to it and completely obliterated the toy. They only thing that survived in 1 piece was the bullet. But yeah, ALL over the living room.
01/19/2011
Contributor: alliegator alliegator
My sister's visiting dog chewed up my Tantus O2. I was so pissed and bummed. Came home to find that she had pushed her way into my room and pulled the dildo out from where it was wedged in between the mattress and headboard, and which was wrapped up in a hand towel from the night before. Why she had to walk past all the various shoes and dog toys loose in the house and go through all that trouble to get to my $90 dildo I will never know. I wanted to yell at my sister to replace it but knew not only would she not, but she would mock my mercilessly. Now I enforce a very strict no dogs in the bedroom rule.
04/09/2011
Contributor: Mommy2 Mommy2
Luckily my dog never gets a hold of mine. She likes to drag stuff out in the yard, i can imagine when my mother in law comes over and there is a giant dildo out on the lawn...
04/13/2011
Contributor: Cream in the Cupcake Cream in the Cupcake
My dogs love to chew everything up. Mostly its the 9 month old german shepard who will pick anything up off the table and tear it to shreds. He would eat any toy but Im really careful about that. He is also the one who disturbs sex too. His giant nose pokes at our butts and he trys to lay with us.
04/13/2011
Contributor: Cream in the Cupcake Cream in the Cupcake
Quote:
Originally posted by Envy
Just think when they're teenagers and figure out what it all is, then go "EWWWW! I touched mom's stuff!"

I only have birds, but I'm smart enough to keep them away from any and all toys. Some of them LOVE to chew soft ... more
LOL I was thinking that too. Im glad I never found anything as a kid, and Im ganna be sure to hide my stuff well when I have kids.
04/13/2011
Contributor: Rossie Rossie
I always make sure our dog's locked out of our room, so there's no chance for him to mess anything up.
04/13/2011
Contributor: VanillaFreeSex VanillaFreeSex
Quote:
Originally posted by Persephone's Addiction
I keep mine hidden away so that my two Pekingese don't get ahold of them. That would be a sad day.

My sister-in-law, though, lost a vibrator because her toddler got ahold of it... She realized that he was being far too quiet and found ... more
lol, i needed that laugh!
04/14/2011
Contributor: ViVix ViVix
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
I know there are often discussions about pets disrupting sex...but do they ever get a hold of your toys? How about your small children?

I would imagine that a dog might be attracted to recently used dildos...they look and probably smell ... more
Every once in awhile I forget I have a toy drying somewhere and my little one gets ahold of it. Thank goodness she isn't even 3. Must find better drying techniques.
08/10/2012
Contributor: VanillaFreeSex VanillaFreeSex
lockbox! especially since it sounds like its kids that are the culprits
08/11/2012