The New Intimacy

If your partner talks REAL dirty to you during sex, do they ever make them apologize after?

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Contributor: nolongerhere nolongerhere
Sorry, meant to say, do they ever apologize to you after...

My husband loves to say horrible things to me during sex, I like it too, but he always apologizes for calling me his dirty slut, or his tight-pussy bitch...etc...afterwar ds. It lets me know it was all in fun. Then we cuddle. Anyone else's lover do this?
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
Hell no, What happens during sex is fantasy and not to be taken seriously!
Persephone's Addiction , SexYnCute Couple , STOPS HERE , TitsMcScandal , Miss Cinnamon , LikeSunshineDust , RadRach , Sammi , Madeira , Alegria , sumie , mllebeauty , Dusk , Jenn (aka kissmykitty) , omgmegg , Adriana Ravenlust , mrs.mckrakn , Shellz31 , OhMy! , Sera , TheSexista , StrawberryEve , EdLynn , 4everHorny , Kim! , potstickers , Tasty Latina , superslinky , Illumin8 , Silverdrop , EvilHomer , AndroAngel , Anonymous.Brunette , Katastophy , geliebt , Eucaly , Princess-Kayla ♥ , kittychilla , stlouisxxx , Gingy , mudpie , Rarity , lost686girl , mpfm , KinkyKatieJames , SecretKinksters , sXeVegan90 , Vanille
48
No, but I wish he/she would
No, I'm glad he/she doesn't
Sir , EndlessFrost , eden89 , Sammi , Dusk , gone77 , LittleBoPeep , lil ladybug , cherie2188 , Lummox , Illumin8 , P'Gell , ParisLove , Silverdrop , AndroAngel , Ghost , geliebt , Princess-Kayla ♥ , Rarity , oneeyedoctopus , Beautiful-Disaster , Kitten has left the site
22
Yes, and I love it!
nolongerhere , Waterfall , SexYnCute Couple , padmeamidala
4
Yes, but he/she doesn't need to
StrawberryEve , ThoughtsAblaze
2
Other-please explain
DeliciousSurprise , Viktor Vysheslav Malkin , ~LaUr3n~ , Sir , Alicia , Misfit Momma , Airen Wolf , Lady Venus , Naughty Student , Jenniae09 , Sera , socceras , toxie m , cheetahpita , Breas , Silverdrop , Rossie , AndroAngel
18
Total votes: 94 (80 voters)
Poll is closed
10/03/2010
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Contributor: Viktor Vysheslav Malkin Viktor Vysheslav Malkin
I think it all depends on the mood, the context, if it went over board and what not?
10/03/2010
Contributor: ~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
They have apologized for out of character wildness, but they didn't need to. I loved it!
10/03/2010
Contributor: Persephone's Addiction Persephone's Addiction
He may say things that shock himself, but it doesn't phase me.
One day he says to me, "I was really thinking about calling you a dirty bitch last time." I give him a look. "You DID call me a dirty bitch last time."
He makes a shocked face. "I did? I'm sorry. Was that ok?"
"Yeah, it's fine."
We had a talk about it - the idea that what he says during sex(which is partially to get himself excited) isn't REAL. Obviously my pussy doesn't BELONG to him, I'm not actually his "fuck toy," nor am I really a "little girl" (lol that last one cracks me up) - so when he called me a "dirty bitch," it didn't even register as something that I could upset about or need an apology for. In fact, the dirtier he talks, the more I like it because it means he's really getting into it. He just about has free reign to say whatever pops into his head.
10/03/2010
Contributor: Sir Sir
I'm usually the one talking extremely dirty, calling her a slut and a whore. And she sometimes expects me to apologize, but I don't. Whenever she's talked dirty to me, the rare occasions, I have not had her apologize. There wasn't any need to!
10/03/2010
Contributor: Alicia Alicia
Not for calling me names or talking extremely dirty in bed, he knows I get into it and that it's just play, he doesn't need to explain himself or apologize to me I think he knows that I know him well enough without him having to apologize.

We have had some rough play where he actually made me cry from spanking me and he apologized then..although he really didn't even need to then..I think I was crying because of some kind of release and not actual pain..but he felt really bad. I remember after that talking to him and saying "I thought you didn't even really like the rough sex, you got pretty into that.." and he said "I said I didn't like it..I didn't say I wasn't good at it.."
10/03/2010
Contributor: STOPS HERE STOPS HERE
Quote:
Originally posted by nolongerhere
Sorry, meant to say, do they ever apologize to you after...

My husband loves to say horrible things to me during sex, I like it too, but he always apologizes for calling me his dirty slut, or his tight-pussy bitch...etc...afterwar ds. It lets ... more
Sex talk is just that, sex talk, i feel it is a way to express our fantasies about our partners and how we would really like to be more open and expressive all the time. There is a place and time for all things though, personally when having sex i feel our sexual inhibitions should be let down and our real passions should take over, of course we don't feel that our partner is a whore or nasty! Words can convey many meanings, they can be taken out of context, but when sex is involved words and communication is taken to a level of showing our deepest desires to fulfill our partners needs, wants, and desires. So no i feel that apologizing for making your partner excited or turned on more is not needed! The most important part about this i guess is having the most extreme Respect for your partner to begin with, if this is a healthy part already of your relationship, then Naughty talk when having sex should not be an issue!
10/03/2010
Contributor: nolongerhere nolongerhere
I think it's more my partner, I think he feels guilty for calling me such naughty things, even though it totally turns me on and i even call myself the same during sex. I think he feels the need to say something afterwards even though I don't NEED him to. I am so in control of everything in my life. In the bedroom I let him take over and I think he sometimes shocked by how different I am. I think he can't believe I let him call me a slut during sex...He knows if he called me something much less mean in real life he'd be in all sorts of trouble. He just whispers it in my ear when we cuddle; it's so cute...
10/03/2010
Contributor: Misfit Momma Misfit Momma
He doesn't apologize for anything really, but I wish he would!
10/03/2010
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
(EF Review Program Mentor)
Quote:
Originally posted by nolongerhere
Sorry, meant to say, do they ever apologize to you after...

My husband loves to say horrible things to me during sex, I like it too, but he always apologizes for calling me his dirty slut, or his tight-pussy bitch...etc...afterwar ds. It lets ... more
There have been times either guy has stepped over the line but generally I'm either laughing or stopping the action to ask what the hell that was about. Then again dirty talk for us gets VERY raw since we can be into some heavy humiliation play at times. Either guy might ask afterward if what they said hurt my feelings but most often they know during whether they have struck a nerve.
10/04/2010
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
(EF Review Program Mentor)
Quote:
Originally posted by nolongerhere
I think it's more my partner, I think he feels guilty for calling me such naughty things, even though it totally turns me on and i even call myself the same during sex. I think he feels the need to say something afterwards even though I don't ... more
Heh both my guys call me filthy things even outside the bedroom...not in front of the kids or when we are having a "discussion" but just as a sort of tweak.
10/04/2010
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
(EF Review Program Mentor)
Quote:
Originally posted by Alicia
Not for calling me names or talking extremely dirty in bed, he knows I get into it and that it's just play, he doesn't need to explain himself or apologize to me I think he knows that I know him well enough without him having to ... more
He sounds like Sigel almost word for word! He doesn't necessarily LIKE rough sex but he's DAMN good at it. Arch likes it well enough but he prefers to be on the receiving end...Sigel laughs endlessly when we get going cause it's like "YOU BAD BAD BOY" spank spank, "Now do me!"
10/04/2010
Contributor: LikeSunshineDust LikeSunshineDust
J and I don't say anything too over the top during sex, but I'm sure he wouldn't even thin about apologizing.
10/04/2010
Contributor: Sammi Sammi
No, I've never seen the need for apologizing - I'm a willing participant to it, and I don't think there's anything he could say that would warrant an apology.
10/04/2010
Contributor: Naughty Student Naughty Student
Well dirty talking is sort of regular for us in the sense that my man uses the same terms all the time and sometimes he's so horny that what he says doesn't make sense. So I just make him feel at ease about the mistake and continue. It never really gets to the point where it hurts my feelings, it has never got there. We're not very good at dirty talking...
10/05/2010
Contributor: Dusk Dusk
Nah, no need. He usually does ask me before we start something though, whether or not I'm comfortable with him calling me names and such.
10/05/2010
Contributor: Jenn (aka kissmykitty) Jenn (aka kissmykitty)
(EdenFantasys)
No apologies necessary. My husband sometimes gets a little bashful about it afterward, but I love it.
10/06/2010
Contributor: Illusional Illusional
Quote:
Originally posted by Jenn (aka kissmykitty)
No apologies necessary. My husband sometimes gets a little bashful about it afterward, but I love it.
Same with my boyfriend. He can be real rough and dirty during sex, but this is a man who is a cuddler afterwards and will just as gently massage me down afterwards.
10/06/2010
Contributor: gone77 gone77
Nope, no apologies given or expected. Now we'd discuss it if he said something that threw me off or made me uncomfortable, but that has yet to happen with any of my partners. We always talk about what we like during dirty talk beforehand, and I think I'd feel weird if a partner apologized afterward. Like, "I'm sorry I said all of those nasty things to you to get you off." Um, what? Getting me off is a good thing and no apologies are needed! lol
10/06/2010
Contributor: mrs.mckrakn mrs.mckrakn
apologize for dirty talk. wtf...first time i hear this
10/06/2010
Contributor: mrs.mckrakn mrs.mckrakn
haha!! my hubbie did once slap me across my face. heat of the moment thing. and he apologized right after. didnt even feel it. haha!! i love vodka...
10/06/2010
Contributor: nolongerhere nolongerhere
Quote:
Originally posted by Illusional
Same with my boyfriend. He can be real rough and dirty during sex, but this is a man who is a cuddler afterwards and will just as gently massage me down afterwards.
This is what I meant, I don't expect an apology, or think one is required, I just think it's cute and sweet.
10/09/2010
Contributor: Shellz31 Shellz31
Nope and I wouldnt expect one. I enjoy it.
10/13/2010
Contributor: Sera Sera
Quote:
Originally posted by nolongerhere
Sorry, meant to say, do they ever apologize to you after...

My husband loves to say horrible things to me during sex, I like it too, but he always apologizes for calling me his dirty slut, or his tight-pussy bitch...etc...afterwar ds. It lets ... more
I slip sometimes, doing it, and it hurts his feelings. He never does it to me, because I hate it, and it hurts my feelings.
10/13/2010
Contributor: TheSexista TheSexista
I LOVE when my hubby talks dirty to me. He ONLY does it because I enjoy it. I know when he calls me his little dirty slut that is is just that words, and has no real meaning after sex.
10/13/2010
Contributor: StrawberryEve StrawberryEve
I really like that sort of thing, but my current partner is so reserved about it. He's always trying to be in control of his emotions so when they get away from him, he gets embarrassed and he thinks that he did something wrong and apologizes.
10/23/2010
Contributor: socceras socceras
nobody has ever said anything i would make them apologize for yet
10/29/2010
Contributor: 4everHorny 4everHorny
Yeah I gotta agree with most here and say there's no need to. I'm the one calling my wife the names but she loves it. She gets into it and uses the names herself even. Like I tell her how she's my slut and her pussy is mine to do with what I please. But in the same token my cock is her's to do with what she sees fit too. I'm just not saying it is all, but we both know its just a fantasy.
10/29/2010
Contributor: mcl272 mcl272
i've also never heard of this! dirty talk is dirty talk! not a big deal.
09/10/2011
Contributor: toxie m toxie m
Most dirty talk is a-okay by me but sometimes he'll say something that just wasn't quite my cup of tea, so afterwards I'll bring it up just to let him know that I wasn't digging that phrasing combination or whatnot. He always apologizes, though it's never really a big deal. Just sorta working out what's sexy and what isn't
09/10/2011