its been years since Ive posted on this site but when I did you guys helped me with a lot including losing my virginity. So anyway I lost my virginity at 23. before that I masturbated at least 3 times a day. So I have a high sex drive. Im 29 now and in my first serious long term relationship. We both live together. for the first time in my life I finally had someone to have sex with regularly I feel I'm still at my sexual peek and I haven't got all the sex out my system due to the years of sexual deprivation. We had sex all the time in the beginning then a death in her family. Went thru a dry spell then back at it sex all the time except for a week or two here and there. then another death in the family and now going thru a nasty custody battle with her only childs father. with the deaths and the court hearings it has taken a lot out of her. she just started medication for depression a few months ago with doesn't help with her sex drive we have been together 2 and half years and haven't been having regular sex since december. She would provide oral to me once a week to somewhat satisfy or tame my sexual frustration. but now its so bad i just feel bad asking. a few days ago we had sex for first time since January. I have been supporting her mentally and financially. I love her so much. Its just hard when the woman you love and are so attracted to is laying next to you everynight and my body wants her. I understand she is not in the mood/ her body does not care for sex. but I my body has needs and masturbating is not reliving or helping. What advice do you men or ladies have for what i am going thru? Any help or advice will be greatly appreciated. THANK YOU!
Featured by EdenFantasys
Help or advice for me?
04/20/2018
- 1
- 2
- 3
- 4
- 5
Have you guys communicated? It really does sound like she's going through an awful lot so it's very understandable. I recommend not pushing the subject, but definitely communicate your frustrations but frame it in a way that you do not want to put more stress/pressure on her -- just that you would like to be as transparent as possible. For you, maybe try doing some more romantic things? Do massages and other stuff to help her through the day (take on a nice dinner, walk, etc.). Women are usually more turned on by things that happen throughout the day, so make sure you are doing everything you can for the relationships and maybe her libido will come back a little.
04/22/2018
Quote:
Thank you! I will definitely take her out more often on dates and do little things through out the day for her. Money has been tight and we have not had a date night in forever but I will try to make time and squeeze some money out for it she obviously deserves it. we have communicated but very briefly even without me saying anything she would here and there apologize and say she is sorry for lack of sex etc. but right now it has gotten to the point where I feel I need to sit her down and tell her it is really affecting me I will do the romantic things first to get her into the mood if not I will just beg her and tell her even if it is just once a week I need something even if it is just a hand job.
Originally posted by
nanamondoute
Have you guys communicated? It really does sound like she's going through an awful lot so it's very understandable. I recommend not pushing the subject, but definitely communicate your frustrations but frame it in a way that you do not want
...
more
Have you guys communicated? It really does sound like she's going through an awful lot so it's very understandable. I recommend not pushing the subject, but definitely communicate your frustrations but frame it in a way that you do not want to put more stress/pressure on her -- just that you would like to be as transparent as possible. For you, maybe try doing some more romantic things? Do massages and other stuff to help her through the day (take on a nice dinner, walk, etc.). Women are usually more turned on by things that happen throughout the day, so make sure you are doing everything you can for the relationships and maybe her libido will come back a little.
less
04/23/2018
Quote:
I think that's the problem -- she is under a lot of stress and there has been no fun in the relationship in a while. I strongly recommend doing a date night. It doesn't have to involve that much money: make sandwiches and go on a picnic. Walk by the river and just talk. Explore fun and free things to do around your town. Then, go home and seduce her: wine, massage, etc. It's not expensive, and it'll help you guys bond a lot. Make sure to also say how sexy she is and how turned on you are by her to set the mood.
Originally posted by
michael scofield
Thank you! I will definitely take her out more often on dates and do little things through out the day for her. Money has been tight and we have not had a date night in forever but I will try to make time and squeeze some money out for it she
...
more
Thank you! I will definitely take her out more often on dates and do little things through out the day for her. Money has been tight and we have not had a date night in forever but I will try to make time and squeeze some money out for it she obviously deserves it. we have communicated but very briefly even without me saying anything she would here and there apologize and say she is sorry for lack of sex etc. but right now it has gotten to the point where I feel I need to sit her down and tell her it is really affecting me I will do the romantic things first to get her into the mood if not I will just beg her and tell her even if it is just once a week I need something even if it is just a hand job.
less
I recommend against begging for sex though, since I think that would just be adding more stress. She might do something, but might start resenting you for it because she simply isn't in the mood and feels pressured to do something.
04/23/2018
Quote:
I absolutely agree with nanamondoute.
Originally posted by
michael scofield
its been years since Ive posted on this site but when I did you guys helped me with a lot including losing my virginity. So anyway I lost my virginity at 23. before that I masturbated at least 3 times a day. So I have a high sex drive. Im 29 now and
...
more
its been years since Ive posted on this site but when I did you guys helped me with a lot including losing my virginity. So anyway I lost my virginity at 23. before that I masturbated at least 3 times a day. So I have a high sex drive. Im 29 now and in my first serious long term relationship. We both live together. for the first time in my life I finally had someone to have sex with regularly I feel I'm still at my sexual peek and I haven't got all the sex out my system due to the years of sexual deprivation. We had sex all the time in the beginning then a death in her family. Went thru a dry spell then back at it sex all the time except for a week or two here and there. then another death in the family and now going thru a nasty custody battle with her only childs father. with the deaths and the court hearings it has taken a lot out of her. she just started medication for depression a few months ago with doesn't help with her sex drive we have been together 2 and half years and haven't been having regular sex since december. She would provide oral to me once a week to somewhat satisfy or tame my sexual frustration. but now its so bad i just feel bad asking. a few days ago we had sex for first time since January. I have been supporting her mentally and financially. I love her so much. Its just hard when the woman you love and are so attracted to is laying next to you everynight and my body wants her. I understand she is not in the mood/ her body does not care for sex. but I my body has needs and masturbating is not reliving or helping. What advice do you men or ladies have for what i am going thru? Any help or advice will be greatly appreciated. THANK YOU!
less
Every relationship passes through different stages, including problems, crisis periods, and so on. Love is what always helps. Try to feel her, don't push, be supportive, add romance to your relationship. As soon as the situation changes for the better, I'd recommend you add some sensual items and couple toys to your sex routine.
04/24/2018
PumpkinButton
Communicating your needs, and understanding her needs. Her having gone threw all this a having a lot of control lost. Sensual play may be good but what that of understand the need for control. It does more to feel that she would have a bit more control so that she may be able to do things at her own pace, may haps? Always best to see what she is comfortable with and best not to beg then without asking nicely. If she's in the mood she may choose to happily partake. And there certainly isn't anything wrong with giving her praise. She's been threw a lot and this may be her way of getting some control back, even if it's just in the bedroom.
Communicate. Romance. Try things together and find a way that works best for you both.
and hey, worship her a bit. Kisses and little nips everywhere. No pushing, unless it is something she is wanting or in the very least she'd like.
Some days it maybe you taking care of yourself but that's not how it will always be.
Hold her and let her know you're there and you support her.
Communicate. Romance. Try things together and find a way that works best for you both.
and hey, worship her a bit. Kisses and little nips everywhere. No pushing, unless it is something she is wanting or in the very least she'd like.
Some days it maybe you taking care of yourself but that's not how it will always be.
Hold her and let her know you're there and you support her.
04/25/2018
Total posts: 6
Unique posters: 4