The New Intimacy

Comprehensive overview poll about what is "normal" among those in the EF Forum "family".

Skip to last post
Set alerts
Updates
Forum search
Contributor: Bignuf Bignuf
I have seen lots of posts about the SPECIFICS or oral sex, or the SPECIFICS of anal sex...and a few that say "do you like this, or that". What I have NOT seen is a kind of comprehensive survey of "what IS the normal" among this group.

I am going to use just some BROAD catagries and I am darn well sure I am going to forget to ask a bunch others, so please let me know which activities I have simply left out, and we can look at a more comprehensive future poll.

SO, the question is: Which if these activities is a NORMAL PART OF YOUR SEXUAL LOVE LIFE. ONLY CHECK AN ITEM IF IT IS SOMETHING YOU DO, OR ARE WILLING TO DO, MORE THEN JUST ONCE TO "EXPERIMENT". IN SHORT, WE ARE LOOKING FOR WHAT PEOPLE ARE WILLING TO DO MORE THEN JUST ONCE...MAYBE NOT FREQUENTLY , BUT ACTIVITIES YOU CONSIDER OKAY, ACCEPTABLE AND NORMAL AS PART OF YOUR LOVEMAKING. ALSO, MAY AS WELL ASK "WHAT WOULD YOU NEVER, EVER DO (OUTSIDE, AGAIN, OF PERHAPS EXPERIMENTING).
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Oral sex IS an acceptable part of our lovemaking.
97
Oral sex is NOT an acceptable part of our lovemaking.
Anal sex IS an acceptable part of our lovemaking.
62
Anal sex is NOT an acceptable part of our lovemaking.
26
S & M, or B & D IS an acceptable part of our lovemaking.
64
S & M, or B & D is NOT an acceptable part of our lovemaking.
19
Roll playing, dress up IS an acceptable part of our lovemaking.
57
Roll playing, dress up is NOT an acceptable part of our lovemaking.
18
Muliple partners IS an acceptable part of our lovemaking.
16
Multiple partners is NOT an acceptable part of our lovemaking.
66
Roll Reversal (Pegging) IS an acceptable part of our lovemaking.
41
Roll Reversal (Pegging) is NOT acceptable part of our lovemaking.
35
Total votes: 501 (99 voters)
Poll is closed
10/17/2011
  • Upgrade Your Hands-Free Play!
  • Long-distance pleasure set for couples
  • Save Extra 20% On Love Cushion And Toy Set!
  • Complete strap-on set for extra 15% off
  • Save 50% On Shower Nozzle With Enema Set
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
All promotions
Contributor: GingerAnn GingerAnn
Forum highlights on Anal Sex:

Does the anal lubricant actually work better than the regular?
for anal sex... its not my thing, but sometimes its neccesary, so any information to make it more pleasant would be nice.

Question for WOMAN only, please. Anal Sex Request...is it a make it or break it in a relationship?
If you desire anal sex as a part of your love life, would you or have you, accepted a long term relationship or marriage to someone who simply will...

How old were you when you first tried anal sex
The title pretty much says it all. I'm curious to know at what age everybody had their first anal sex experience. I think to make it easy to compare...

Men & Anal Sex
I've been with a lot of men who absolutely hate the thought of receiving anal stimulation of any kind. I mostly want a male-opinion on this: what's...

Silver Bullets
I got a silver bullet vibrator in an anal sex kit, and I was wondering if it was me or is yours loud too??? It is a full sized silver vibe with a...
10/17/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
It's all acceptable, but that doesn't mean we do it on any kind of a regular basis.

Anal is once in a blue moon. BDSM aspects are cool, but only very specific ones. 'Multiple partners' has incredibly strict and well-defined boundaries. It's by no means a free-for-all.
10/17/2011
Contributor: unfulfilled unfulfilled
We do oral, anal on occassions (I'm still working my body to it), some basic beginner aspects of BDSM, and roleplay.
10/17/2011
Contributor: js250 js250
My husband and I tried anal about 12 years ago and I was permanently damaged due to our lack of knowledge for preparation. Anal is a huge HELL NO! now. I am a big wimp when it comes to an kind of discomfort and also very claustrophobic so we do not experiment with BDSM. However, we enjoy semi-public, light voyeurism/exhibitionis m (camming anonymously, c2c chatting, omegle, etc.) and am very open about fantasies, toys and new options.
10/17/2011
Contributor: Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
It's all acceptable, but that doesn't mean we do it on any kind of a regular basis.

Anal is once in a blue moon. BDSM aspects are cool, but only very specific ones. 'Multiple partners' has incredibly strict and well-defined ... more
Understood...and clarification appreciated. However, there are all kinds of "shades of gray" from "do it every day, to do it, as you say "once in a blue moon", for each of these, so right now, I was just asking for who WOULD do these things...and who would NOT (as an OKAY thing...not just a one time "experiment".
10/17/2011
Contributor: Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
My husband and I tried anal about 12 years ago and I was permanently damaged due to our lack of knowledge for preparation. Anal is a huge HELL NO! now. I am a big wimp when it comes to an kind of discomfort and also very claustrophobic so we do not ... more
"permanently damaged"???? Honestly, please share what that means, either as a warning or education to others. Even those who care to enjoy anal sex should understand how to do it SAFELY and without pain!!!
10/17/2011
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
It's not so much that any of these are unacceptable - but some are just not 'our thing' like BDSM or her thing like pegging.
10/17/2011
Contributor: AndroAngel AndroAngel
Most of those are acceptable, however, I don't believe in any such thing as "normal" sexuality, and I honestly think the concept is damaging to those who fall outside of common sexual practices.
10/17/2011
Contributor: Antipova Antipova
I wasn't able to vote that BDSM was or was not acceptable in my current relationship---I'm not sure where on the spectrum what we do falls. We do a little forced orgasm play and some spanking, but nothing very intense...
10/17/2011
Contributor: domsub1993 domsub1993
good poll!
10/17/2011
Contributor: Kkay Kkay
We fall more on the D/s side of things. Pegging is the only one I didn't answer- it's not something that we do, but it's a potential for the future and isn't blacklisted.
10/17/2011
Contributor: Anjulie Anjulie
I'm not into multiple partners if I am in a relationship with someone. Everything else is pretty normal for me.
10/17/2011
Contributor: Sweet-Justice Sweet-Justice
Everything but the Multi Partners is accepted in mine and my wifs relationship
10/17/2011
Contributor: The Curious Couple The Curious Couple
My fiancee and I aren't into having more than one partner, but everything else is fine for us!
10/17/2011
Contributor: Diabolical Kitty Diabolical Kitty
Everything except multiple partners is good with us too!
10/17/2011
Contributor: Midway through Midway through
I didn't vote on oral because it's honestly an "other"

I do not want him going down on me. I don't enjoy oral sex, but I don't mind giving him a blow job during foreplay.
10/18/2011
Contributor: null null
Heh, we do all of that except costumes!
10/19/2011
Contributor: chenault chenault
Technically my partner and I are incapable of pegging, as neither of us are men, and I wasn't really sure what else would count as "role reversal", given that we're both switches... so I left that option alone. And we've never tried multiple partners, and I'm not really sure how I feel about it, so I left that one alone too. Everything else, we've done and liked (except costumes, we're too lazy, LOL).
10/23/2011
Contributor: TheSlyFox TheSlyFox
My relationship is pretty open when it comes to everything. (:
10/24/2011
Contributor: Chirple Chirple
The ones I said no to were :

Anal, just because neither of us are really interested at this time. We don't think it's weird or gross or wrong or anything. It's just not something I care about. I haven't even gotten fully in touch with my other parts yet, anyway. :s

Ds, honestly, I've always had an interest, but partner does not, not at all. While I wouldn't mind trying, it's not killing me not to. I would consider it "normal" in the sense that it wouldn't be crazy and weird to me. I think it's a very creative aspect sex/love/interaction and that interests me, as does different sensations.

Multiple partners, we're both rather shy and I think it'd be hard to find someone we were both *that* comfortable with. I think it would be very hard for me to be comfortable in that situation, it would take a lot of work.


But heck yes, costumes.
12/03/2011
Contributor: geliebt geliebt
Role reversal and multiple partners were the only things I checked no for. Everything else is all good! Role reversal is just a turnoff for both of us, big time, and multiple partners are a no because we both like monogamy in our relationship.
And I gotta agree with Chirple, heck yes costumes!! We both costume for fun and for charity on a normal, daily basis, so... bringing it into the bedroom is really a small step, haha!
12/03/2011
Contributor: Princess-Kayla ♥ Princess-Kayla ♥
I only checked no for role reversal and multiple partners.
I have several sets of lingerie and a few costumes, and we enjoy to dabble in some BDSM. I'm not a huge fan of anal sex, but I don't hate it. And oral sex is amazing. <3
12/27/2011
Contributor: Harpina is gone Harpina is gone
I would consider all except for multiple partners.
02/16/2012
Contributor: gloomybear gloomybear
wow great poll
04/03/2012