I don't think so but sometimes I question myself. I have been married for 44 years, 62 years old active and in pretty good shape. The reason I ask is I am getting tired of a very vanilla sex life. I am beginning to wonder if I have missed out on some things that most considered normal.For instance I have been craveing anal sex, giveing and recieving ( pegging or penile ).Also I have been participateing in an all male circle jerk with mutual touching. Very erotic.My fantasies center mostly on male/female interaction but the wife denies participating. I would love some face sitting, light BSDM,sloppy bj's,face fucking,watching porn togeather,etc.etc.Just plain old fun and laughter in the bedroom or wearever we decide to fuck.Transgender male to females are also begining to attract me to the point of searching out trans escorts.My wife is satisfied with regular sex and not interested in spiceing things up. It has always been my responsibilty for makeing the first move,buying toys, even leaveing the lights on when we screw. I recently bought a strap-on and brought the idea up of her pegging me. She was horrified at the idea and refused to even look at the dildo.We have sex 3 to 4 times aweek with oral, hand jobs and penatrative sex mixed in. And I always make sure she cums atleast once if not multiple times but there are times I do not climax because she gets too tired from her climaxes. Go figure. Our kids are gone why can't we just bust loose on occasion? Am I just looking for satisfaction or is my sex life plain vanilla? less

I don't think so but sometimes I question myself. I have been married for 44 years, 62 years old active and in pretty good shape. The reason I ask is I am getting tired of a very vanilla sex life. I am beginning to wonder if I have missed out on some things that most considered normal.For instance I have been craveing anal sex, giveing and recieving ( pegging or penile ).Also I have been participateing in an all male circle jerk with mutual touching. Very erotic.My fantasies center mostly on male/female interaction but the wife denies participating. I would love some face sitting, light BSDM,sloppy bj's,face fucking,watching porn togeather,etc.etc.Just plain old fun and laughter in the bedroom or wearever we decide to fuck.Transgender male to females are also begining to attract me to the point of searching out trans escorts.My wife is satisfied with regular sex and not interested in spiceing things up. It has always been my responsibilty for makeing the first move,buying toys, even leaveing the lights on when we screw. I recently bought a strap-on and brought the idea up of her pegging me. She was horrified at the idea and refused to even look at the dildo.We have sex 3 to 4 times aweek with oral, hand jobs and penatrative sex mixed in. And I always make sure she cums atleast once if not multiple times but there are times I do not climax because she gets too tired from her climaxes. Go figure. Our kids are gone why can't we just bust loose on occasion? Am I just looking for satisfaction or is my sex life plain vanilla? less

I have the same issues, buddy. I'm 50, been married about 19 years now. Wife never seems to be on my "sex level". I can come up with 101 different interesting things to spice it up...but she can rarely come up with 2 or 3. I too buy like 99% of the toys we have. I feel I need to initiate most of the "interesting" sex with her, or else it will NEVER happen. Even if we somehow do something "interesting", it often disappoints me because she just doesn't seem to put in the effort or fusses too much, etc. For example, I'd like to go to a nudie bar with her, but I'm afraid the experience will suck because she just won't get into it. There are a lot of freaky things I'd like to do to her and with her, but no longer really put in the effort to do so because I sense the "fuss".

Threesome? FFM or FFF or MMF...forget it - I've been barking up that tree for years now.

As far as "freakiness" is concerned, I'd rate my sex life with my wife a 4/10. It's not straight vanilla, but its just a hair better than that - and mostly because I am the one who pushes for it. With a standard effort on my behalf, there would be no freakiness. It could be so much better, however, but that is not up to me. But I will offer a few reasons why my wife (and yours) are content with plain/vanilla:

1. Never really had a boat load of sex appeal to begin with.
2. Learned being plain/vanilla from her plain/vanilla parents.
3. Not confident with her body/looks.
4. Motherhood took its toll and has re-shaped her sex thinking.
5. Maybe, she no longer looks at you like a sex thing (too much time together with the exact same person, perhaps?).
6. Nice girls don't do those things and she's too afraid to try now.

At this point in my life, the tiger isn't changing its strips. Probably same for you. You have to accept and move on. Get whatever you can, but find something else to supplement. I guess that's why God created internet porn. It's the next best thing to cheating without cheating. If she isn't up for it, a thousand other chicks (from 18 to 98) are willing and ready to indulge you.

Good luck!!! less

Well I finally had it two years ago and told her that things needed to change. At 60 I wasn't getting younger and wanted to experience things while I could, rather than regretting it later.Things improved maginally but not much.I just don't understand why a women who loves her husband can be so reluctent to do things she knows her husband would enjoy. I am a good guy,handsome,good provider,great father, mister fixit and I must say a pretty good lover.I would think that sexual exploration would be very enjoyable.Sex brings an immense amount of pleasure to me and I would hope it would to most women sooooo why not pursue it? At the very least take pleasure in pleasuring your partner, I do! How about some reciprocal treatment. I don't like pursuing sexual satisfaction elswere but I have. less

I think there are a lot of married guys like us...wanting our wives to be more freaky, sexually outgoing, taking the initiative, etc. There are some wives who do meet or exceed our desires (go check out the BET channel and watch music videos for about 30 minutes - these chicks are freaks!) And some wives are somewhere in the middle. But most probably aren't. I think part of the problem is the typical guy...guys by nature want variety and are risk-takers - more so than women. Thus, we are more likely to want to experiment with sexual satisfaction and fantasies. So our "bar" is set higher than the wives' bar. Most of them just can't match or exceed our desires for reasons I listed in my previous post. And I bet if you ask your wife if she is "freaky enough", she will say "absolutely yes". In their minds, they are giving us plenty, but in our minds, we aren't getting enough - its not miscommunication or lack of love...its just the "bar".

And of course when we push to get want we want, it never seems to satisfy us. Unless she is REALLY into it, and wants to put in the extra effort, we won't be satisfied. In the past I tried so many times with so many different possibilities, but most of the time I was left somewhat unsatisfied and slightly frustrated. So I have just shelved most of my freaky desires with her and now let internet porn take care of those cravings. It is what it is. However, you are married to her and you chose her. Not everyone is perfect. And like Springsteen stated, "you have to learn to live with what you can't rise above if you want a ride down into this tunnel of love".

I will add this final comment: Any wife who doesn't put out much or wants to keep things "bland/vanilla" has no right to ever get pissed off at her husband when she one day discovers his online porn excursions. Tough crap...you don't like it - do something to keep me from wanting to do it. Sorry to vent like this, but its all about the "bar"... less